


Into Each Life Some Rain Must Fall

by SkylarEQuinn



Series: InkVerse [2]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-10
Updated: 2017-03-10
Packaged: 2018-10-02 06:05:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 50,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10211213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkylarEQuinn/pseuds/SkylarEQuinn
Summary: InkVerse WWII Human AU. Matthew Williams had always advised his rambunctious, younger half-brother to never fall in love when stationed in a foreign land, believing that nothing good can come out of it. But when he meets a young waitress by the name of Irunya Chernenko while stationed on the Ukrainian border, he can't help but fall for her charms. He finds himself rethinking his advice.





	1. Chapter 1

Autumn, 1929, Des Moines, Iowa

Matthew Williams gripped his father's hand tightly as his deep blue eyes took in the military school he would be attending. He clutched at his white teddy bear. It was far from home, but he knew it would be hard, yet there was someone here who he hoped would make it worth it.

Matthew was always aware of the fact that he had a brother, and he knew the boy's name. He knew they were roughly the same age, but he had never met him. They had the same father, but different mothers. Matthew's mother had been a woman their father had met while on a business trip in Canada while he was married to his brother's mother. They had met and fallen in love, resulting in Matthew. His father had quickly divorced his brother's mother and came to marry his mother. Yet Matthew never thought that was right. Though he was only six, and didn't know much about the world, he still knew enough to know that what his father had done was wrong. And he couldn't imagine how his brother must feel about it.

He looked up at the name plate on his bedroom door. "Matthew Williams". It made the decision to attend this academy more final. The name below his was familiar enough. "Alfred Jones". He tried to read it, yet his reading wasn't all that great yet. Matthew shrugged his shoulders and got situated.

"Well, I better get going, sport," Henry Williams said after helping Matthew unpack and situate himself. He pushed his blond bangs out of his blue eyes. Matthew had been told he looked almost like a younger clone of his father. "Will you be okay?"

Matthew nodded. "Yes," he said in a soft voice. He was always very soft spoken, a trait he had received from his mother. "Will you visit?"

Henry patted Matthew's head, ruffling his hair. "Of course I will," he answered with a grin. "Why wouldn't I?" Matthew shrugged. "You just have fun, okay? And write often, got it?" He winked at Matthew before kneeling to hug the frightened boy.

Matthew wrapped his arms tightly around Henry's neck, the situation finally becoming real as he blinked back tears. He wasn't going home with his dad. "I love you," he softly said.

Henry smiled and pulled away, kissing the top of Matthew's head. "I love you too, Mattie," he said. "Be good." He turned and left, leaving Matthew alone in the room.

Matthew crawled onto his bunk in the room and held his teddy bear tightly to his chest. "It's just us now, Kumaburo," he softly whispered to it. "We'll be okay, won't we?" He tipped over, resting his head on the pillow. "Maybe things will get better if we can find my brother."

The door opened and a boy Matthew's age walked in. Matthew blinked in surprise. The boy looked nearly identical to him, same hair color and eyes. Who knew finding him would be so easy?

"You Matthew?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at Matthew, who solemnly nodded. "I'm Alfred F. Jones, your roommate. If you need someone to show you around, just let me know." The boy suddenly blinked in surprise as if noticing that Matthew looked just like him. He suddenly looked very uncomfortable. "Just let me know," he huffed before going to his bunk and busying himself with polishing his boots.

Matthew lowered his eyes. Alfred obviously didn't want to talk, so he kept his mouth shut as well, not wanting to offend the boy. Instead, he focused on his stuffed bear, his only friend he's had for the past three years. After all, most parents didn't want their children to be friends with a boy whose mother was a mistress to a married man. A lot of parents in his hometown looked to Matthew as if he were an abomination, the most filthy child they had laid eyes on. He just hoped that one day, he could have a good bond with his brother, the only person he felt would understand.

.

Early February, 1942, London

Matthew Williams patrolled the hallways of the military base, his captain badge polished and shining on his chest proudly. He nodded to his superiors and smiled brightly at the people below him. He was looking for one person, and one person only. The one person who would be proud of his accomplishment.

Shouts could be heard from down the hall and Matthew picked up his pace, especially when he recognized one of them clear as day. Someone was picking a fight with his brother again, which was a thing that happened on a regular basis, especially because Alfred was very hot-headed and always fought back.

"I'm not the fucking captain!" Alfred's voice shouted when Matthew got closer, causing the captain to stop in his tracks. "You've got it all wrong! That's my brother, not me!"

"You expect us to believe that you have a brother who looks exactly like you?" a new recruit demanded. "We all know that you're not a twin! You can't pull that! We saw a picture of you getting the badge! All we want is to see it!"

"I don't have it!" Alfred yelled. From his tone, Matthew could tell he wouldn't last much longer without violence. "And he does look just like me! If he ever comes to the base, you'll see for yourself!"

Matthew knew he had to intervene, so he entered the room to see Alfred cornered by some new military recruits who didn't know their place. They looked like fighter pilots, though. Matthew knew how cocky their type was. And from where he was, he could see Alfred's fists clenched in rage. Yet no one noticed him as he stood there.

"Gentlemen, what seems to be the problem?" Matthew kindly asked, raising his voice slightly above the usual quiet tone he used so he could be heard.

The pilots turned to him and their eyes widened and their jaws dropped.

"And how long did you plan on keeping quiet about being at the base?" Alfred demanded, giving Matthew an annoyed look. "About time you showed up, Mattie."

"Captain Williams," Matthew corrected, shooting Alfred a stern look.

"Yeah, whatever," Alfred muttered, sulking to himself.

Matthew smiled fondly at his brother before turning to the pilots, giving them a look that was less kind. "So do you have a reason for harassing a soldier?" he asked. "The fact that you two are pilots does not change the fact that we are all fighting for the same thing. I will not tolerate bullying in the base while I am around. You two are dismissed."

The pilots left, bewildered. Neither of them could tell if the young captain was angry or not because he never once raised his voice. Yet his eyes held fire in them.

"I could've handled that on my own," Alfred grumbled, crossing his arms. His bad attitude faded when he looked up at Matthew's kind smile. "We need to catch up on a few things, don't we?"

Matthew nodded and glanced at the clock. It was pretty late at night. He knew Alfred could talk for hours. "Come to my bunk, Al," he said, nodding in the direction of his quarters. He knew Alfred wouldn't get in trouble being in his quarters if he was there, and since they were brothers, no one ever thought it was weird when Alfred followed Matthew around. Honestly, Matthew secretly liked the attention his brother gave him. It was pretty much the only attention he ever got.

Alfred eagerly followed Matthew and patiently waited for him to get dressed and ready for bed, foot tapping like crazy due to his impatient tendencies. "Mattie, hurry up," he finally groaned.

Matthew walked out of a bathroom stall, buttoning up his night shirt the rest of the way. "Okay, let's go, Al," he sighed, leading the way to his bunk. He sat and pulled the covers up over his lap with just enough room for Alfred to sit next to him. "What did you want to talk about?"

Alfred sat back against Matthew's pillows and sighed, looking up at the ceiling. "Where do I even start?" he sighed. "Well a few weeks ago, I came across a little Chinese kid being bullied by some kids at a local school."

"A Chinese kid in London?" Matthew asked, situating himself on his pillows so he could relax without falling asleep.

"Let me finish," the younger brother stated. "So I got the kids to leave him alone. The little boy's name was Leon Kirkland. A pretty English last name for a Chinese kid, you know? So I think he's adopted. Anyway, I walk him home, and no one is there when we get there. Turns out, his dad is off at the pub next door, getting drunk. Can you believe that?!"

Matthew yawned a little. "Why would he do that?"

"I realized it when Arthur came home," Alfred sighed. "That's the dad's name, Arthur." He got a dreamy look in his eyes. "Arthur is full English, pale skin and all. Leon had mentioned that his mom died when he was born, so I figured Leon must look like her. And that's when I realized that Arthur went to the pub every day to get drunk, so that he wouldn't have to see his dead wife when he got home, so he couldn't recognize his own son…" He sighed. "Just like she used to do to me when I was Leon's age. Dammit, he's only five." Alfred clenched his fist. "He shouldn't have to live that way!"

"'She' meaning your mother?" Matthew cautiously asked. He knew that was a touchy subject, considering that he and Alfred had the same father, whom they both looked exactly like.

"I don't care what anyone says, Colleen Jones is not my mother," Alfred grumbled, crossing his arms angrily.

"Do you ever wonder if Leon thinks the same about Arthur?" Matthew quietly questioned.

"Not at all," Alfred answered, shaking his head. "That boy thinks the world of Arthur. But he thinks Arthur hates him." His face clouded over. "Mattie, this little boy is nearly six years old and he sees the world through the eyes of an adult." The words pained him as he said, "This little boy once asked me if he thinks I think his father hates him because he killed his mother…"

Matthew gasped, horrified. "Why would a five-year-old even have a thought like that?"

"I feel like that boy is so much smarter than he lets on," Alfred sighed. "And he's seen more than his father knows."

"You relate to him, don't you?" Matthew asked, laying back comfortably now.

"It's more than that," the soldier sighed. "I can't stop going over there. I'm there whenever I have free time. But my favorite part isn't when I'm playing with Leon." He lowered his voice so only Matthew could hear. "My favorite part is when I'm alone with Arthur, and he's sober. He is kind and funny and open. We stay up and talk after Leon goes to bed. Mattie, Arthur has the most beautiful green eyes I have ever seen. They're like emeralds."

Matthew frowned. He remembered the last time Alfred had spoken this way about someone. It hurt his heart to think of the way it had ended. "Tell me more about Arthur," he encouraged. He knew he was the only person Alfred could probably ever talk to like this, the only person Alfred really could trust completely with who he really was.

"Where do I even begin?" Alfred began quietly, a dreamy look in his eyes. "He pretends to be a complete gentleman, but after he gets comfortable around you, he swears like no other. And I know he really does care about Leon from the way he changes his mannerisms around the boy. I notice that he tries to be more cheerful and all that when the boy is around." The smile that was on his face when talking about Arthur slowly faded. "You know, Leon did something kinda weird the other day…"

"What did he do?" Matthew asked, rolling over to face his brother. He was fighting sleep really hard by this point, having been up since the crack of dawn.

"He called me 'Dad'…" Alfred softly said. "And then after he said it, his eyes got really wide. And he looked so scared. He clung to me and begged me not to leave him, telling me he was sorry and that he wouldn't do it again…" He shook his head. "It was so sad to see. He was scared that I would leave him for calling me that."

Matthew yawned and bit his lip. "That poor kid." He couldn't keep his eyes open any longer. "Alfred, if his father is as neglectful as you think, please keep an eye on that boy."

Alfred smiled. "I'll keep an eye on more than just the little boy," he quietly teased with a wink. He still had that dreamy look in his eyes. "Mattie?"

"Yeah?" Matthew mumbled, slowly slipping into a deep sleep.

"I haven't felt this way about something before in my life," the younger brother softly admitted. "Mattie, I think I'm in love…"

The captain mumbled some kind of encouragement and then placed a hand over Alfred's mouth. "If you're going to stay here with me, you're going to sleep, Alfred," he muttered to his brother.

Alfred pouted a bit but then laid down as well. "Goodnight, Mattie."

Matthew nodded and muttered something like a response and fell into a deep sleep.

.

Late March, 1942, London

Matthew marched down to the corridor of the base to the command office. He had been called there by a superior officer. He already had his suspicions of what it was. His men had all been wondering when they would be transferred. This probably had to do with a transfer.

"Good afternoon, Captain Williams," a general greeted. He nodded to the young captain.

"Afternoon, General," Matthew answered, saluting the man. He always felt nervous around men who were higher up.

The general smiled lightly at Matthew. After all, Matthew wasn't the type of person someone could be around without smiling. "We have your assignment, Captain Williams," he said. "You and your men will be stationed in a small Russian town on the Ukrainian border. Just a warning, it will be cold."

Matthew bit his lip. "With all due respect, sir, I am technically Canadian. I am sure I can handle the cold."

The general laughed. "Ah, Williams, always one with the jokes! We'll miss you around the base!"

"When are we to be shipped out, sir?" Matthew asked.

"Tomorrow morning, 0600 on the dot," the general stated.

Matthew nodded and saluted. "Yes, sir," he said.

"And one more thing, Captain," the general said. He gave Matthew a concerned look. "Can you make sure that brother of yours behaves himself while you are gone?"

Matthew bit his lip and nodded. "Yes, sir," he obediently said. "I will speak with him when I am done here."

"You are now dismissed, Captain," the general stated, saluting Matthew back.

Matthew left to find Alfred. After a while of searching, he realized that he should probably check the time. A clock told him that it was half past five. Alfred was at Arthur's. Matthew had been told he was welcome there at any time. He didn't really want to intrude upon his brother's time with that family, but he felt he needed to spend time with him.

.

A small Asian boy looked up at Matthew at the door of Arthur's flat. His brown eyes sparkled with excitement. "Alfred!" he called into the flat. "Alfred, your brother is here again!" He looked excitedly up at Matthew. "Come on in, Captain Williams!"

Matthew smiled and entered. He patted the boy's head after he shut the door. "How many times have I told you, Leon? Call me Matthew."

Leon grinned widely as Alfred walked into the front room. He looked confused, but happy to see Matthew. A shorter blonde man with emerald green eyes, Arthur, followed just after, looking just as confused but happy.

"Hey, Mattie!" Alfred greeted. Arthur cringed from the volume of his voice and shot Alfred a warning glare. Alfred noticed and gave Arthur an apologetic look. "What brings you here today?"

Matthew smiled sympathetically. "Can I talk to you privately?" he softly asked.

Alfred's eyes widened. "Is something wrong?"

When Matthew took a moment to answer, Arthur read the atmosphere and placed his hands on Leon's shoulders. "Let's go, Leon," Arthur said, leading the small child from the room. "Alfred and Matthew need some time to talk."

"Mattie, what's going on?" Alfred asked his brother once Arthur and Leon had left the room, brow furrowing in worry.

"I got my latest assignment," Matthew simply said, trying not to meet his brother's eyes. "I'm being shipped off to the Russian border tomorrow morning."

Alfred's face fell. "Mattie?" he softly said. His voice broke Matthew's heart. Alfred's voice was never this quiet. "Please, just…" He took a deep breath. "Tell me it's not true…"

"Al," Matthew softly said. He stepped over to Alfred, closing off the gap of space between them. His arms wrapped around his younger brother in a comforting hug. "I'll be okay, I promise. Don't worry about me."

Alfred took off his glasses and let them drop onto the soft plush carpet. "Mattie, you're all I have left," he struggled to say. "You're the only member left of my family."

Matthew frowned. "It will be okay, Alfred. Nothing bad will happen to me." He held his brother, who had begun to shake. "I'll be extra careful. I'll come home, I promise."

Alfred hiccupped and sniffled a little. "I'm going to come back to the base with you tonight," he decided. "We should get going…"

The captain frowned. "You don't have to, Al…"

Alfred shook his head. "No, Mattie," he stated. "This is the last time I'll see you until God knows when." Matthew was happy that he had at least kept a positive outlook instead of implying that he won't come back. "I need to be with my brother."

Matthew smiled softly. "We can stay here for a while longer if you'd like," he suggested. "After all, I wouldn't mind spending some time with Arthur and Leon before I leave."

Alfred pulled away and forced a smile as he tried to compose himself. "Yeah," he managed to say. "I think they would like that, too."

Matthew smiled. "Trust me, Alfred," he began, reaching out to wipe his brother's tears away, "I'm not leaving forever. And I'll write to you every chance I get."

Alfred smiled grimly. "You better."

For the first time in years, Matthew finally felt at a loss. His brother desperately needed him. The last time Alfred had fallen for someone, things ended worse than anyone could imagine. But this time, Alfred was in love with a foreign man, a man he would never see again after the war. He had always warned Alfred against falling in love while stationed somewhere, but it seemed that brother of his would never learn. At least Matthew was smarter than that.


	2. Chapter 2

Early Summer, 1937, Des Moines, Iowa

Matthew was awakened early on a Saturday morning by a rambunctious Alfred jumping onto his bunk. He rolled over and tried to catch his breath, having the wind knocked out of him. "What do you want?" he gasped.

"Mattie, the greatest thing happened!" Alfred practically sang at his brother. He reached onto the bedside table and grabbed Matthew's glasses, pushing them into his hand. "Come on! Wake up! I want to talk to you!"

Matthew groaned and put his glasses on. "Then talk," he mumbled. He sat up and rolled his eyes. The sky was red as the sun was beginning to rise. "Wait a minute! Were you out all night?!"

"Details, details," Alfred sighed. He pounced, poising himself on his hands and knees, leaning toward Matthew. "Now, let me tell you about my night!"

Matthew sighed. "I don't have much of a choice, do I?"

Alfred smiled. "No, not really."

Matthew groaned. "Then tell me."

He listened as Alfred talked about his night with a boy he had met the day before at the park. Alfred had spent the entire night out walking around with the boy, who was seventeen, two years older than them. The story concluded with Alfred and the boy sharing a steamy passionate kiss with some other sexual activity involved. Matthew begged for him not to go into detail with that.

"You know you're the only one I can talk to about this, though," Alfred sighed, sprawling out over his brother. "Just let me talk. I swear I won't go into horrifying details."

Matthew sulked a little. "Fine, but I'm taking a shower after. It's the only way to get your sinful stories off of me."

And thus Alfred began to tell more about the previous night with the mysterious boy, going into great detail, much to Matthew's dismay. But Alfred did have a point. Matthew truly was the only person he could ever tell.

.

Late March, 1942, London

Matthew woke up around 5:30 the morning of his departure to Russia. He frowned when he looked over and saw Alfred sleeping next to him, glasses resting crookedly on his nose. Alfred wasn't there when he had fallen asleep. He shook his brother lightly by the shoulder. "Al," he whispered. "Al, wake up."

Alfred's eyes fluttered open. "Good morning, Mattie," he greeted with a sleepy smile. "Heading out soon?"

"In half an hour," Matthew confirmed, rubbing his eyes before reaching for his glasses on his night stand. "When did you crawl into my bunk? I must've been out."

"A couple hours ago," Alfred admitted, biting his lip. He was quiet for a few moments before saying, "I don't want you to leave, Mattie."

Matthew gave his brother a sympathetic look. "I know you don't, Al," he sighed, placing a gentle hand on Alfred's shoulder. "But they didn't give me the title of Captain for nothing," he assured. "It means I will definitely return, so don't worry about me. Everything will be fine." He reached over and fixed Alfred's glasses. "Please take care of yourself while I'm gone and try to stay out of trouble, got it?"

Alfred yawned and nodded. "Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got it," he grumbled. He sat up and took off his glasses for a moment to rub his eyes. There were slight hints of dark circles beneath them.

"So when did you finally fall asleep?" Matthew asked curiously as he stood up and began to change into his uniform.

Alfred sighed and laid back, placing his glasses back on his face. "Probably about a half hour ago," he yawned. "I don't want to do training or anything today."

Matthew gave his brother a sympathetic smile. "I know you don't," he sighed. "But do it for me. Until I come back, do everything military involved for me, okay?" He sat on the bunk and rested a hand on Alfred's shoulder. "I need to know that you'll be okay," he softly said.

The younger brother sighed. "I will be," he slowly said. "Don't worry about me. I mean, I still have Arthur and Leon, right?" That comment made Matthew smile with relief. "Besides, the war will be over before you know it and we'll see each other again."

Matthew smiled. "That's right, Alfred. We'll go back to Iowa, and things will be okay again."

"About that," Alfred began. He refused to meet Matthew's gaze. "I don't think I want to go back there."

Matthew was confused. "Then where would you go?" he asked. "If not back to Des Moines, then where?"

Taking a deep breath first, Alfred finally said, "I want to stay here if I can. This is where Arthur and Leon are."

"Getting citizenship of another country is harder than you think, Alfred," Matthew advised. "Trust me, I would know. You remember how much studying I had to do when we were younger to become a citizen of the United States."

"Arthur's worth it," he finally said.

"I'm glad you have something to work for, and someone to work for." Matthew ruffled his brother's hair. "My baby brother is growing up," he teased.

"Baby brother?" Alfred questioned. "You are three days older, Mattie. Three days! I'm not a baby."

Matthew grinned and returned to putting his uniform back on. "Whatever you say, Alfred. Just respect your elders."

Alfred sighed. "Do you really have to go, Mattie?" He frowned and stared up at the ceiling. "I don't want you to go."

Matthew frowned as he buttoned up his jacket. "Look, Al, I'm not happy about it either, but I know we'll be stationed in the same base again. It's only a little while. Kinda like when we left the academy and had to go to two different bases to train? Think of it like that."

"You didn't have a chance of dying at the base!" Alfred nearly shouted, sitting up.

Matthew froze. "I'm going to be fine," he stated, turning to Alfred. "Come on, it won't be forever. I can't leave until I know you're fine." He looked at the clock. "Please calm down. I'll write to you on the way there and send it when I get there. Will that help?"

Alfred sulked a little but finally nodded, a bitter expression on his face.

"You coming to see me off?" Matthew asked, lacing up his boots.

"What kind of brother would I be if I didn't?" Alfred asked, cocking his head to the side. He frowned and stood up, pulling his own boots on and lacing them up. "I may not like it, but I know that I should." He pouted a bit as he tied them.

Matthew ran a comb through his hair and adjusted his cap on his head. He frowned when he saw Alfred's badge was crooked and leaned over him to fix it. "What am I going to do with you?" he sighed.

"Dunno," Alfred casually answered. "Guess I need you around." He batted his eyes at Matthew. "Does this mean you have to stay here?"

Matthew scoffed and messed up Alfred's hair. "Nice try," he said with a smirk. "Come on, let's get going. It's nearly six."

Alfred huffed a bit and fixed his hair before standing up and stretching a little. It was very obvious that he had barely slept the night before. Matthew could see it in his gaze that refused to focus for longer than thirty seconds. It made the older brother feel bad, knowing that Alfred had lost precious hours of sleep over him.

Matthew led the way down the corridor, Alfred dragging his feet all the way. He turned around and gave his brother a disapproving look. Alfred grudgingly picked up his feet as he walked, frowning and sulking until they reached other military personnel. Both brothers stood at attention and saluted the other soldiers.

The send-off was too fast and before Matthew knew it, he was in the back of a military truck in a caravan, watching Alfred as they drove away. His heart broke at the obvious tears streaming down his brother's face. He hoped he would be okay. After all, this goodbye didn't mean forever.

.

After nearly an entire day in the truck, Matthew felt about ready to scream. The soldiers in his battalion had asked nearly every hour on the hour where they were. Every three hours, they would stop to fill up gas and so the men could get out and stretch their legs. He was sick of this truck and wanted to be done with it but he knew he still had at least another day of it left.

At one of their stops in Warsaw, Poland, they heard screaming as two young men ran to their trucks. One had shoulder-length brown hair and pleading blue eyes. He looked about Matthew's age and was holding the sleeve of a boy who looked very young. The boy also had blue eyes but short, choppy brown hair. Both of them looked terrified as they spoke rapidly in another language that Matthew couldn't comprehend.

"Do you speak English?" Matthew finally asked slowly.

The older boy gave him a confused look. "You are English?" he finally asked.

Matthew breathed a sigh of relief. "Not exactly. I'm Canadian-American. We're of the American military. Is something wrong?"

"The Germans!" the younger one cried out. "They're here! They took Feliks!"

The older boy looked pained at the name "Feliks". "Please! You must help us! We're Jewish! Do you know what they will do to us if they catch us?!"

"I don't want to go to a camp!" the younger one cried out, grabbing Matthew's sleeve tightly. "Please don't let them take me! I can't!"

"Raivis!" the older one scolded, shooting the younger boy a stern look. He looked up to Matthew. "Please! At least save him! He's only fifteen!"

Matthew frowned and looked toward his commanding officers. "I will see what I can do," he stated. He turned to the men of his battalion. "In the meantime, I want you to hide these two in case there are any Germans around here." The soldiers nodded and Matthew stepped over to his officers and explained the situation as much as he could with the little information he was given.

"Could we smuggle them into Russia?" one general asked another. "After all, they would be safe there."

After about five more minutes of discussion, Matthew was ordered to give them spare uniforms and have them change into them in the back of the truck. The older boy introduced himself as Toris Laurinaitis and the younger as Raivis Galante. Raivis trembled so badly that Toris and Matthew both had to help him get dressed.

When they all climbed back into the truck, Matthew sat next to Toris as Raivis napped on Toris's shoulder. It made Matthew wonder what all they had been through on that day. He also wondered who this Feliks person was, but judging by Toris's reaction to the name when Raivis said it, he decided to save that question for later.

There was a point in the middle of the night where only Toris and Matthew were awake. Neither of them could sleep in a moving vehicle comfortably, being jostled in many directions at once. It was Toris who finally spoke.

"I would like to thank you for your kindness, Captain Williams," he finally said, voice soft and low.

Matthew glanced over at him. "You're welcome, Toris."

"If you wouldn't have helped us, we would've ended up like him." Toris blankly stared up at the ceiling. He muttered something in another language as his eyes clouded over a little.

"Where are you from?" Matthew asked after a moment. He glanced over at Toris when the other didn't reply immediately. He hoped he wasn't disturbing his thoughts.

"I am from Lithuania," Toris finally said. "Raivis is from Latvia. He is my cousin's son, so I feel responsible for him. I came to visit Poland for holiday from school, and my cousin asked me to bring Raivis along. You see, he is a very shy boy and does not get out much. He had always looked up to me though we did not see each other often." He smiled fondly at the boy sleeping on his shoulder. "I need to make sure he makes it out of this war alive, so I can get him home to his family."

Matthew nodded. "I have a younger brother who isn't all that great with people," he admitted. "His name is Alfred. I mean, he really is a swell guy, but sometimes he can be a real handful. He recently found someone who puts up with it, though." Matthew smiled, thinking of Arthur and how patient he was with Alfred. "We are all each other has in this world. We look like twins, but I'm three days older."

"Three days?" Toris asked, confused. "How is he your brother who looks like you, yet his birthday is three days after yours?"

"We have different mothers," Matthew admitted, looking down. "Our father didn't believe in loving only one woman. My mother was his mistress, whom he chose over Alfred's mother."

Toris frowned in sympathy. "I am sorry to hear that, Captain Williams." He was quiet for a moment. "Do you two have a good relationship?" he finally asked.

Matthew smiled to himself. "He's my best friend," he admitted. "We met when we were six at the same military school when we were assigned as roommates." He frowned. "He didn't like me all that much at first. But we started to bond and he taught me baseball. I taught him hockey." He smiled. "His mother drank herself to death when we were eight. Our father and my mother died in an accident when we were twelve. Being orphans, we chose to be wards of the state and stayed at the military school until we were eighteen, which is when we both enlisted, seeing nothing better to do than to give back to the country who gave us so much."

"But when you introduced yourself earlier, you added another country to your American status," Toris stated, confused.

"Yeah," Matthew sighed. "I am originally from Canada, which is the country to the north of the United States of America. But when I chose to be a ward of the state, I had to apply for American citizenship. Although, I didn't exactly get that until I was about thirteen."

Toris sighed and looked ahead of him blankly. "It sounds as if you have been through a lot, Captain Williams," he mused.

Matthew nodded. "But it was all worth it. I have no regrets regarding my life." He looked down at the Captain badge on his chest. "I've made my way up the ranks of the military."

Toris looked over at him and smiled. "That is wonderful to hear." He sighed. "So I guess it should be my turn, right?"

"Your turn?" Matthew asked, confused.

The Lithuanian nodded. "Yes," he answered. "You seem like someone whom I can trust with it."

"I have been trusted with many things."

Toris smirked. "While in Poland on my holiday, I met a man by the name of Feliks." His face turned slightly dreamy. "He was unlike any man I had ever met. Especially since he wore women's clothing. I thought he was a girl at first, if I'm being completely honest. He took quite the liking to me." His voice went lower, almost near whisper. "We fell in love not long after meeting," he admitted. "And when the Germans showed up at his home today, they beat him and dragged him out when he answered the door. Raivis and I barely escaped out the back." He hung his head. "I hate to admit that Raivis witnessed what the did to Feliks…"

Matthew frowned. "The American troops are working on helping those captured by the Germans. I hope we can save Feliks."

Toris smiled gratefully to Matthew. "Thank you, Captain Williams. Your kind words give me hope." Then he seemed to stare off into space once more, face blank.

Matthew decided it would be best to leave him be for the time being.

.

Two days later, they finally arrived in the town where they would be stationed in. After getting situated, Matthew and his men, including Toris and Raivis, decided to stop by a local restaurant to get something to eat, having not had real food in a few days.

The restaurant was nice. It had an eating area, a bar area, and even a dance floor, where they played both Russian and American music from a radio. It was very homey and made all of the soldiers feel at ease. Even Raivis had managed to stop trembling.

When they were all seated, a young woman who looked in her mid-twenties walked over. She had short, nearly white-blonde hair and big, blue eyes that held a sparkle of innocence in them. But the thing most of the men at the table immediately noticed was her large bosom. Some of the men in the battalion were almost gaping at it. Matthew looked away in embarrassment.

"May I get you gentlemen something to drink?" she asked, voice thick with a heavy Russian accent, though her English was very good.

The soldiers all made snide remarks under their breath, which made Matthew blush, having never heard men talk so vulgarly about a woman right in front of her. They all eventually placed their orders between comments to each other about the waitress's chest.

The waitress turned to Matthew as if blissfully unaware of the remarks of the other men at the table. "Excuse me, but I do not believe I got your request," she said to him.

Matthew glanced at the menu. "I will have a water," he stated.

She beamed at him. "Right away for all of you," she assured before walking away to fulfill their drink requests.

Matthew took a moment to glare at the battalion. "You do know she can understand you, right?" he quietly snapped to them. "That's very rude."

A soldier laughed. "Come on, Captain, she seems fine with it. Besides, since when are you so into the feelings of women? Must come from hanging around with that brother of yours."

Matthew's cheeks burned at the mention of Alfred in such a negative way. "There is nothing wrong with my brother!" he snapped, causing Raivis to jump. The captain regained his composure. "Please just try to be respectful and not wear out our welcome in this restaurant. It actually seems like a decent place to eat."

"Have you seen the woman who took our orders, Captain?" another soldier asked almost mockingly. "She makes it worth coming here!"

Matthew sighed. There was no getting through to them.

.

The rest of the meal was like that, the soldiers all commenting on their waitress and Matthew scolding them whenever she walked away. He was so relieved when it was time to leave that he even offered to pay the bill, telling his men they wouldn't be so lucky next time. The men all filed out as Matthew paid the bill, but the young Captain wasn't planning on leaving before having a word with that waitress.

He found her at the bar, filling up some drinks. He sat at a stool and gestured for her to come over.

The waitress smiled brightly at him. "Hello! What can I do for you? I hope your time here was well!"

"It was," Matthew said. He blushed a bright red. "I would personally like to apologize for the men in my battalion. I know you could hear what they were saying, and I know you understood them."

The waitress looked shocked. "Oh, it is fine. You do not have to apologize…"

Matthew slid some money into her hand. "You deserve every last bit of this," he told her, looking away. "Again, I am sorry for the inconvenience." He wracked his brain, trying to think of what she had introduced herself as. "I am sorry, but I do not believe I caught your name."

"It's Irunya," she softly answered. She looked at the money in her hand and her eyes widened. "Sir, I do not believe that you realize how much you have given me!"

"I know how much I gave you," Matthew assured, standing up. "And like I said, you deserve every last bit of it for putting up with the way they harassed you. Thank you for your time, Irunya." He turned to leave.

"Wait," Irunya softly said. She held the money back out to him when he turned back. "I cannot accept this. I don't even know your name." She frowned slightly.

"My name is Captain Matthew Williams of the American military," Matthew said. He waved her hand away. "It's yours. Please take it." He then turned and left before she could stop him again.

On his way out, the only thing he could wonder was why his men would openly harass a woman in a foreign country in that way, but not one back home. What made women so different around the world?


	3. Chapter 3

Matthew laid in his bunk that night. He had put his letter to Alfred in the mail, hopefully he would receive it within the next few days. His mind was still trying to wrap itself around the blunt and outright rudeness of his troops toward Irunya. He just couldn't understand what made her any different from an American woman.

Deciding not to think too much about it, he rolled over and set his glasses on his night stand. Instead, he thought of what Alfred was probably doing. It was still early afternoon in England, so Alfred was probably training and waiting to go to Arthur's house.

Matthew frowned as he imagined Alfred sobbing to Arthur about him leaving the other morning. He squeezed his eyes shut with a sigh. That was one thing he couldn't let himself think about at the moment. Anything but an upset Alfred!

His mind drifted off more as he felt himself fall under sleep's hold. He didn't want to sleep, yet he knew he couldn't fight it. These last few days had been too exhausting for him to not want to fall asleep the moment he reached a bed.

.

Late Summer, 1937, Des Moines, Iowa

Matthew frowned as Alfred sauntered into their shared dorm room one Sunday morning. "Alfred, this needs to stop. I'm running out of lies for you."

Alfred sighed. "Let me be in love, Mattie! Please!" he pleaded, pouncing onto Matthew's bunk. He ignored Matthew's scowl as he kissed his forehead sweetly. "You covering for me is the key to my happiness!"

Matthew sighed. When Alfred put it like that, how could he refuse? "You're going to get us both in trouble, you know," he scoffed. "And when do I even get to meet this guy?"

The younger brother bit at his lip. "You want to meet him?" He looked a little troubled. "Why would you want to meet him?"

Matthew raised an eyebrow in suspicion. "Why wouldn't I want to?" That seemed like a pretty stupid question to him. "I would like to meet the guy who stole my brother's innocence."

Alfred blushed deeply. "Why did you have to put it that way, Mattie?" He thought for a moment. "You see, he doesn't really know that you know about us is the thing…"

Matthew sighed. "Al, I've been lying for you for over a month now."

"I know that," Alfred assured, biting his lip. "It's just that…" He sighed. "Mattie, I'll lose him if anyone finds out."

"Alfred, I'm not 'anyone'," Matthew stated. "No one really even knows I exist and always mistake me for you. If anything, I'm no one."

Alfred's expression turned pained. "But you're not 'no one' to me. You're my best friend, Mattie."

Matthew smiled slightly. "Then prove it."

Alfred sighed. "Mattie, why are you doing this?"

Matthew frowned. "Doing what? Risking my reputation here? Risking expulsion? Risking my future in the military? I honestly don't know either!" He almost wanted to take back his words the moment he saw Alfred's face fall, but he knew that if he did Alfred would walk all over him. "So tell me what I'm doing that's so bad for you."

The younger brother sat on his bunk and hung his head. "I'm sorry," he finally said. His voice was soft and muffled, but Matthew heard it clear as day. "I shouldn't be so selfish all the time, Mattie."

Matthew hummed his agreement but chose not to say anything. He knew that his silence would affect Alfred more than his words. After all, Alfred had a very guilty conscience.

Alfred slowly got up from his bunk and laid down on Matthew's, putting his head in his brother's lap to prove he was sorry. He reached for Matthew's hand so he could hold it. Matthew gave Alfred one hand and used the other to comfortingly stroke Alfred's hair.

"Are you mad at me?" Alfred hesitantly asked.

Matthew smiled down at him. "Not at all, Al." He patted his brother's head reassuringly. "I do these things for you because I want to, not because you're forcing me."

The younger brother's eyes closed for a moment, exhausted from staying out all night. "You're all I have now, Mattie. I just have to make sure I'll never lose you." He squeezed Matthew's hand. "You know, you're the best brother a guy could ever ask for. I hope you know that."

Matthew chuckled lightly to himself. "So I've been told once or twice," he teased to Alfred. "Why don't you get some sleep? You look exhausted."

"Can I sleep right here?" Alfred asked, opening one eye to look up at Matthew.

Matthew sighed, smiling warmly. "Why not?" he agreed. Deep down, he was secretly overjoyed that Alfred favored him to anyone else. After all, his brother didn't trust easy, so him relying on Matthew to keep his dirty, little secret nearly overjoyed the young Canadian. And ever since his parents died a couple years before, Alfred was the only person who truly understood him.

Alfred smiled up at Matthew. "Good night, Mattie."

Matthew smiled back. "Good night, Al."

.

Mid-April, 1942, Ukrainian Border

Matthew sat at the bar in that Russian restaurant he went to on his first day. He was alone that day, enjoying some of his free time alone. Irunya was busy tending the bar and bussing tables, along with a small girl who looked highly unfriendly, a mocking scowl on her face. He decided not to bother them at all, even coming to the point where he was wiping down the bar whenever someone left.

He heard a teasing laugh behind him as he wiped a part of the bar. "You're like a mother, you know that?" a heavily accented female's voice teased from behind him.

Matthew turned around, startled. He hadn't noticed Irunya watching him. His face turned a deep shade of red. "A mother?" he asked, squinting at her through his glasses. They were dirty with specks of dust and splashes of alcohol from trying to help clean.

Irunya smiled warmly and plucked his glasses from his face, taking a clean cloth from her pocket and wiping them clean. She handed them back once she was sure they were clean. "Better?" she asked, smiling brightly.

Matthew put his glasses back on and blinked in surprise. They were the cleanest they'd been in a long while. "A lot better," he said. "Thank you." He offered her a smile. "Sorry if it feels like I'm taking over your job. I noticed the restaurant was busy today, so I thought I'd help a bit."

Irunya laughed brightly. "No, you do not need to help, Captain Williams." Her smile illuminated her face. "I mean, we do appreciate it, but that's what Natalia and myself are for."

Matthew blushed a little. "I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to do your job, ma'am…"

Irunya winked at him. "We can handle this, Captain." She turned to walk away.

"Matthew," he softly corrected, his voice barely above a whisper.

The Ukrainian woman hummed an acknowledgement to him as she turned around. "What was that?" she asked, cocking her head to the side in confusion.

"Matthew," he quietly repeated. "My name is Matthew."

Irunya smiled knowingly. "So that is what the 'M' on your badge stands for," she mused, eyes twinkling. "It is hard to say."

"What would be a good substitute for it?" Matthew asked. "Captain Williams is too formal."

"Matvey," she decided after thinking for a moment. "It is perfect for you." Some men at a table across the room began calling loudly to Irunya. "I need to get back to work now. It was nice talking to you. I hope to see you again soon, Matvey."

Matthew watched her walk away. He smiled and decided he should probably head out soon. After all, he had awkwardly been there all afternoon. Yet just as he was leaving, he ran into Toris and Raivis at the door with a couple of his other troops.

"Captain Williams?" Toris asked, confused. "What are you doing here?"

"Table for six?" Irunya asked, walking over. She shot a discreet wink to Matthew.

"Actually, I was just…" Matthew began.

"Come join us," Toris encouraged as Irunya led them to a table.

Matthew followed along, blushing a little. Irunya and Natalia were technically the only people who knew how long he had really been there, yet Irunya didn't seem to mind him being there a little longer. In fact, it seemed he was going there a lot. He seemed drawn to this little restaurant whenever he had free time. Maybe it was the welcoming environment. He wasn't completely sure, but he liked whatever it was there.

"Anything special tonight, Irunya?" Raivis asked curiously. He shivered a little with excitement.

"Actually, tonight there is a dance being held here," Irunya told them all, smiling brightly as she did so. "It starts in about an hour. They are usually a lot of fun. You can dance and eat and drink and have fun!"

Toris smiled. "Then I guess we picked a good night to come here. Tell me, do you dance at these?"

Irunya blushed deeply. "Me? No, never. No one has ever really asked me to dance."

"No one?" asked one of the troops. "Well, Miss Chernenko, your luck may change tonight!" He elbowed the other soldier in the ribs, winking.

Matthew didn't like the way he said that, but he knew better than to call the man out in public.

The waitress shrugged carelessly. "Well I mean regular men ask me to dance all the time," she began. "But it takes someone truly genuine and special to get me to dance." She shot a wink to all of them. "I take it the usual for all of you?" The men at the table all agreed. "How did I know?" she teased, smiling before she walked away.

"Genuine and special, eh?" one of the soldiers at the table scoffed. "Women never know what they want. At least we fit in that category since we're all foreigners, am I right, Laurinaitis?"

Toris smiled. "Possibly," he thought aloud. "Yet I wouldn't ask her to dance, to be honest."

"And why is that?" the other soldier asked.

Toris's eyes followed the second, smaller waitress around the room. "I've got other ideas."

Raivis followed Toris's gaze and tried to hold back an almost scoff. "You think she would say yes to you?"

"Who could deny a handsome Lithuanian man such as myself?" Toris confidently said.

Raivis laughed nervously. "Me."

Toris shot Raivis a look and turned his focus to the table. He seemed a little troubled, yet no one really knew what to say to him. Matthew was the only one besides Raivis who knew about Feliks, so he felt a small twinge of pity.

Irunya returned to the table with a tray of drinks. She began to set them all on the table saying, "For you," to every man. Her hand lingered on Matthew's drink for a moment before she took it back and said, "And for Matvey." She smiled. "Your food will be ready soon."

"What did she call you?" Toris asked him, wide-eyed. "Matvey?"

"I guess so," Matthew softly stated with a shrug. He busied himself with drinking some of the soda placed before him.

"Maybe she has developed a liking to Matvey," stated Raivis.

Toris looked over at him scoldingly. "Raivis, think before you speak," he snapped at him. The younger boy quickly lowered his head. "I've studied a little bit of the Russian language," Toris continued to Matthew. "I'm pretty sure the name Matvey means 'God's gift', if I'm not mistaken."

Matthew's cheeks burned with a sudden blush. "I think she just chose it because it sounds similar to my first name," he softly assured.

"You never know," Toris said with a shrug.

.

The dance was loud and wild, men dancing all over the floor with women to loud Russian music to an occasional English song. Matthew found himself tapping his foot under the table to a lot of the music playing. The dancing was lively, and he enjoyed the beautiful, graceful dancing when the songs turned slow. It reminded him of the ballroom dancing classes the academy had him and Alfred take when they were younger.

Irunya stood behind the bar, laughing and turning down every man who asked her to dance. Matthew didn't want to feel conceited about it, but he could've sworn her gaze wandered to him on multiple occasions. He blushed at the thought of it. Then a song that he knew all too well came on.

"Last dance!" a man called out in a thick, Russian accent. He then proceeded to yell what Matthew presumed was the equivalent in Russian.

Matthew glanced to Irunya and noticed she was watching him. He blushed a bright red. Was she wanting him to ask her? What if she openly turned him down as well?

"Captain Williams," Toris said, moving closer to Matthew to be heard. "Miss Chernenko has been watching you all night. I think she wants to dance with you."

"Nonsense," Matthew stammered at him. "Impossible. Don't think such things."

"Go ask her," Toris encouraged. "You may never get another chance like this."

"What makes you so certain?" Matthew asked him, raising an eyebrow.

"Natalia, the other waitress, may have hinted it here and there," Toris finally admitted. "Look, you need to ask Irunya to dance. You'll never get another chance so perfect."

Matthew blushed and stood after a few moments. He timidly made his way to the bar. "M-Miss Chernenko," he slowly began, getting her attention.

Irunya smiled brightly at him. "Ah, Matvey!" she greeted happily. "What can I do for you?"

The poor captain struggled to find his voice. "I-I came t-to ask if you'd like to dance," he finally said.

Irunya smiled at him for a moment, her eyes sparkling. "I'd love to," she said, emerging from behind the bar. She took the hand Matthew timidly offered her and let him lead her to the dance floor.

Many onlookers stood in shock, knowing that Irunya always denied every man who asked her to dance at these. A few couples even left the floor to make sure there was room to dance. A lot of men stared at Matthew in awed envy as the two gracefully danced.

"Into each life, some rain must fall, but too much is falling in mine," a voice sang from the speakers as Matthew softly hummed along.

"You know this song?" Irunya asked him, smiling. "I have heard it once or twice, and I always thought it so pretty."

"My brother listens to music like this a lot," Matthew admitted. "He is a lover of all types of music." He was amazed at how natural dancing seemed with her, at how skilled of a dancer she really was.

Irunya grinned happily. "So you have a brother? Tell me more about yourself, Matvey."

"What is there to tell?" Matthew asked. "I am not too interesting of a person, I am afraid." He bit his lip a little, hoping she didn't think of him as boring for saying that.

Irunya giggled a little as she moved slightly closer as they danced. "I do not believe that for one minute," she simply said. "Everyone is great in their own way, whether they see it or not." She winked. "So what is it that you think makes you great?"

Matthew blushed a little. "I don't know," he finally admitted. "I guess it depends on what one would justify as great."

Irunya cocked her head to the side with interest. "Well put, Matvey. Yet there seems to be many things to make you great from my view."

"I guess it's just a matter of perception then," Matthew stated. "After all, you barely know me."

"That is true," Irunya agreed. "But you don't have to know someone completely to know whether or not they have a good heart. After all, not just any man who comes in here will wipe down the bar for Natalia and myself when we are busy."

"You've got me there," Matthew admitted, blushing deeper.

"Sometimes it's the little things that someone does to help someone determine their greatness," she softly said. The song ended and they stopped dancing. "Thank you for asking me to dance, Matvey. I waited all night, and I am glad that I wasn't disappointed."

"You waited all night for me?" Matthew asked in disbelief. "But earlier you said…"

"Someone genuine and special," Irunya finished for him. "And that's exactly what you have always been for me since day one." She curtseyed to him. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get ready to clean up. It was fun, and I hope to see you again soon."

Before Matthew could say anything, Irunya rushed off. Yet her words rang in his head over and over. "Someone genuine and special. And that is what you have always been for me since day one." Those words echoed in his head for the rest of the night as well. What exactly did it mean?


	4. Chapter 4

Early Fall, 1937, Des Moines, Iowa

Matthew stood in the park near the military school late at night. When Alfred had refused to introduce him to his mysterious suitor, he decided to follow him one night. He was sure that they would be there. After all, it was the place where Alfred's stories began every morning.

His ears perked up as he heard Alfred's voice. It sounded distant, yet nearby. Maybe his voice was just quiet compared to how it usually was. Matthew looked around wildly and eventually found Alfred with a guy who looked a year or two older than them. He tried to focus his gaze better so he could see the boy's face, but the sun had already fallen and his eyesight was already terrible as was.

Alfred leaned in and kissed the boy softly, causing a burning blush to fill Matthew's cheek. He had never seen Alfred that gentle with someone before. It was almost as if Alfred were a completely different person.

This Alfred was quiet and gentle. He didn't yell at this guy or push him. Alfred held his hand and spoke softly, stealing innocent kisses every now and then. It shattered Matthew's heart to thousands of tiny pieces. This was the part of Alfred that no one else could know. This was the part of Alfred that he could never let anyone see.

Matthew watched for a moment, wondering if this was what it was like to be in love. He had seen his parents when he was a child, but it was so long ago that he barely remembered. In his time at the academy, he wasn't around people who were romantic, so to speak. All he could gather from what his mother had told him when he was young was that falling in love in the way he was watching was something special that happened only once in a lifetime. And if you were lucky, it could happen twice. But rarely more than that.

"So my brother keeps asking where I'm going at night," he heard Alfred softly say, sighing.

"Tell that brother of yours to mind his own fucking business," the guy scoffed. "Seriously, he sounds like a drag from what you say."

"He's not," Alfred awkwardly tried to explain. "It's just that if the officers find out he's lying, we could both get expelled and he could get deported back to Canada and…"

"So he's not even American?" The guy scoffed mockingly. "What the hell is he doing at an American military academy with you then? Let him get deported."

"But…" Alfred went quiet. "He's my best friend…"

"What's better, Al?" the guy asked. "A best friend, or someone who loves you like I do?" Alfred was so quiet that Matthew felt the two could hear his heart pounding from his hiding spot. "That's what I thought. Look, Alfred, finding a man who attracted to other men is a rare thing. Best friends come and go. Think of what would be more important in the long run."

Matthew couldn't take it anymore. Was this why Alfred didn't want to introduce him to this guy? Because he constantly talked down to Alfred? Matthew could handle the insults to him, no problem. But what he couldn't stand was the way he talked to his brother. What gave him the right to say that to someone like Alfred?

It took every source of willpower that Matthew had not to break the guy's nose. Instead, he went back to the academy, fuming with anger. But he knew he couldn't tell Alfred he was there. If Alfred knew, things may get worse. After all, Matthew knew his brother couldn't keep his mouth shut, and it would only be a matter of time before the guy found out that Matthew had spied. Matthew had no doubt in his mind that the guy would take it out on Alfred and that would be one thing he couldn't stand for. He just hoped Alfred was smart enough to let go of him.

.

Late May, 1942, Ukrainian Border

After that dance, Matthew found himself going to that restaurant nearly every day, even days when Irunya wasn't working. Natalia, the other full-time waitress, would be the one to serve him. There were days she would scowl at him, and days where she would smile. It would all depend on if Toris was with him.

Matthew was alone on the day he had received his orders of a transfer. His heart felt heavy for some reason. He had grown quite accustomed to this small, Russian town. He was to be leaving in two days. In his blind distress, he wandered into the usual restaurant.

Irunya stood over him. "Matvey, is something wrong?" she asked, raising a concerned eyebrow.

Matthew looked up in a daze. "Irunya?" he asked, hardly able to recognize the lovely Ukrainian girl. He was struggling the think clearly, let alone see clearly. "I just have a lot on my mind is all."

Irunya frowned. "I am sorry to hear that." She sighed and looked to the clock on the wall. "Unfortunately I work to close tonight."

Matthew looked to her. "Why would you consider that unfortunate?" he asked her, frowning. "I mean, it's your job. You're here nearly every day."

"But my favorite customer is distressed," she sighed, leaning onto the table. "What is wrong, Matvey?"

"Do I have to tell you now?" he asked. "I mean, it's so early into your shift, Irunya." She frowned and hardened her gaze on him, which caused him to sigh. "I got new orders today."

Irunya began to slowly shake her head in disbelief. "No," she softly said.

"I'm being transferred to France in two days," he continued.

She pressed her hands over her ears, shaking her head wildly. "No!" she cried out. "Please! No!"

Customers watched the display she made, casting Matthew angry glares, although Matthew just stared at Irunya with a look that was a mix of both confusion and horror. He didn't know what to do to make her stop, and wasn't even sure if he could make her stop.

Natalia rushed over and began talking to Irunya in rapid Russian, to which Irunya tearfully replied in Russian. The smaller girl shot Matthew angry glares every few exchanges as she tried to comfort Irunya, who was sobbing by that point. Matthew was completely horrified and confused. Everyone was blaming him, but he had no idea what he had done. Natalia eventually rushed Irunya to the back of the restaurant, which had gone completely silent except for the music playing on the speakers.

Matthew felt horrible as the other customers glared at him. He slowly got up, preparing to leave when suddenly Natalia was standing before him, glaring.

"You're not going anywhere," she snarled at him, pushing him back into his seat, accent heavy. "Not until I have a word with you."

Matthew now realized why Raivis trembled whenever she was around. "I don't know what I did, but please don't hurt me," he managed to stammer after finding his voice.

Natalia's eyes were like ice blue daggers. "Why would you so casually say that to her?" she demanded. "Why would you just so casually tell Irunya that you are being transferred without even a care for how she may feel about it?"

"How she may feel?" Matthew asked, confused. "I have no idea what you're talking about. Why would she care?"

The young waitress's eyes widened in realization as Matthew's obliviousness hit her. "You have to be kidding me," she muttered to herself. She began yelling at him in Russian, knowing he couldn't understand her while the other customers watched with amused looks on their faces. When she was done and satisfied, she went back to the kitchen area to comfort Irunya.

Matthew was dumbstruck. What was going on? Why was Irunya crying? Why was Natalia yelling at him? Why was everyone staring at him like he was either an idiot, a god, or the scum of the earth?

A few minutes later, Irunya walked back into the restaurant area. She had composed herself and her puffy eyes were the only indication that she had been crying. She slowly made her way back to Matthew's table. "Matvey, I have something I want to say to you."

Matthew looked up at her, hoping she could at least explain things to him. "Are you okay, Irunya? I didn't mean to upset you, honest."

"Please," she softly said, holding a finger to his lips, "don't talk, Matvey. Just listen." Irunya sat as he table and leaned across it toward him, lowering her voice so only he could hear as Natalia purposely turned the speakers up so the restaurant couldn't listen in. "I have switched shifts with Natalia."

Matthew raised an eyebrow. "What does that mean? Why does that apply to me?"

Irunya pinched his lips shut with her fingers. "Matvey, no talking," she softly scolded. She sighed out. "That means tomorrow is my day off. I would like to spend it with you if you would have to time, for I have some things to explain to you."

Matthew nodded. "I am free after eleven," he answered. "Shall we meet here?"

Irunya eagerly nodded, smiling. "How does noon sound?" she asked. Her eyes lit up at her bright smile, causing Matthew to smile at her eagerness.

"It sounds swell, Irunya," he answered. "I will meet you here at noon. But in order to do that, I will have to leave now to make sure everything is packed and ready."

Irunya nodded. "Do what you must, Matvey, as long as you promise that you will spend my day off with me."

Matthew grinned at her. "I promise, Irunya," he assured.

Irunya gestured toward the door. "Then you are free to go. But just so we're clear, if you stand me up, it will be the biggest mistake of your life."

"I'm quite aware of that," Matthew laughed, "trust me." He stood and headed toward the door with a wave. His head was buzzing. Did this mean he was going on a date with her? Was it a date? Why was he so confused? He still didn't get why she was so upset about him leaving, but decided not to worry about it. After all, she said she would explain tomorrow. He would just have to wait until then.

.

Matthew was wearing civilian clothes outside of the restaurant when he checked his watch. It was noon, and he was tapping his foot as he waited nervously. He had never seen Irunya outside of when she was working, so he wasn't sure what to expect.

"Matvey!" Irunya's voice sang as she approached him. Her voice sounded so bright and cheery that it caused Matthew to look over at her.

Matthew had heard his mother mention once or twice how some women had the bodies of models, yet no one knew it. He was pretty sure Irunya was one of them as he saw what she was wearing. He had to focus his brain on his jaw muscles to keep it from dropping.

Irunya was wearing a mint green sundress that was form-fitting. It was tight enough to show she was a woman, yet loose enough to show she was a lady. Small, white canvas shoes covered her feet. In her silvery-blonde hair was a mint green bow with white lace on the edges.

"Good afternoon, Irunya," Matthew greeted, struggling not to trip over his words. Yet she was so beautiful that he just couldn't help it. Why hadn't he noticed how beautiful she was before? "You look stunning."

Irunya's cheeks dusted over with a soft shade of pink. "Thank you, Matvey," she shyly said, looking at her shoes. She brought her head up and smiled at him. "Shall we be on our way?"

Matthew offered her his arm like he had seen his father do with his mother all those years before. "Of course," he said.

Irunya smiled and accepted, slipping her arm through his. "Let us go anywhere but that restaurant." She smiled up at him. "Today, I wish to learn more about you, and I hope you learn more about me."

"How would you like to begin that?" Matthew asked. He began to lead her down the street toward a park. "Would you like to walk through the park?" A smile played on his lips a Irunya smiled and nodded. "Do you have any brothers or sisters?"

Irunya slowly nodded. "I have a younger half brother," she softly mused. "His name is Ivan, but he has a different mother than I."

"You too?" Matthew asked. "I have a younger half brother as well. Mine's name is Alfred. He is three days younger than me, also with a different mother. Everyone says he and I look nearly identical. It is said that there is a trait in our father's family that every male born looks exactly like his father. That must be why people think Al and I are twins."

Irunya smiled. "I learn something new every day," she softly mused. "Where is your brother right now, Matvey?"

"He's in England," Matthew softly said. "We joined the military together. Ever since we were six, we've done just about everything together. He's my best friend."

"I am glad you two have each other," Irunya said, smiling up at Matthew.

"What about Ivan?" Matthew asked. "Where is he? What's he doing?"

Irunya shrugged. "Who knows? I haven't seen him since he was small. The last time I saw him, I was nine years old." She giggled a little. "Fifteen years ago."

"You're twenty-four?" Matthew asked.

Irunya looked at him. "Is that so hard to believe?"

Matthew shook his head. "No, not at all. I just thought you were younger is all."

Irunya smiled at him. "Everyone does. How old are you, Matvey? You seem like the age one perceives you at is incorrect as well."

"I'm nineteen," Matthew answered, nearly blushing. He worried if Irunya would see him as immature for being five years younger.

Irunya smiled warmly. "The same age as Ivan," she softly said. "I was always curious as to your age, Matvey. You seemed wise beyond your years, yet I could never actually tell when your years actually were."

Matthew smiled a little. "I've been told I'm a bit mysterious," he admitted. "Some people don't even believe I exist until they actually meet me. But everyone knows my brother whether they want to or not." He bit his lip and muttered, "God, I hope he's okay."

"You worry about Alfred?" Irunya asked, observing.

"More than I care to admit," Matthew softly said. "He's different than most people I know. He sees the world differently, and very few people are aware of that fact because it would be dangerous for too many people to know." He sighed. "I mean, I have to believe that he's doing well so I can keep myself from worrying about that moron at all times." He chuckled to himself. "He's a great guy, I swear. He's just a bit stubborn and ornery."

Irunya smiled widely. "Matvey, tell me more," she insisted. "I want to know more about you, more about America and your life there."

So the day went on with Matthew talking about America with Irunya, and Irunya occasionally talking about how things were for her when she was growing up in Ukraine. She explained how she had moved to Russia a couple years before with her family after her father had gotten promoted at his job. Things seemed well for her family, which made Matthew happy. All of the talk had made Matthew completely forget that he would be leaving the next morning, probably to never return to this small town.

"Matvey, I will miss you," Irunya softly said as the two sat on a park bench, the sun setting in the distance. They were the only two there, which was just how she wanted it. "I wish you didn't have to leave."

That was when it hit Matthew once more. He was leaving for France in less than twenty-four hours. "Yeah," he softly said. "I will miss you too, Irunya."

She looked over at him. "You will?" she asked, eyes widening.

"You're the only person I could actually call a friend that I've made in this town," Matthew shyly admitted. "And I've enjoyed spending the day with a beautiful woman such as yourself, and being the envy of every man who we have encountered together. That dance last month was an incredible night. I had never danced with a girl like you, and it was a lot of fun. The military doesn't allow me to give you a return address, but I would love to write to you if you would allow it."

"Matvey, I…" Irunya's voice trailed off as she looked to him. She frowned when Matthew looked to her as well, confused. "I…"

Before he knew what was going on, Irunya was kissing him. It was Matthew's first kiss, and he wasn't quite sure what to do. But as it continued, he sort of naturally figured it out as his arms wrapped around her torso and pulled her closer to him, her arms snaking around his neck as she pulled him closer as well. Though he had never considered the fact that he could be in love with a girl like Irunya, there was no mistaking it now.

Matthew was, without a doubt, head-over-heels in love with a girl who never made her feelings known until it was too late. He was in love with a girl he would never see again after this night. His mind screamed at him about why he should never fall in love when stationed in a foreign country, knowing he will never see her again once he left, yet he couldn't help what he felt. His heart ached when he realized that the reason he was so defensive of her around the other men, especially his own soldiers, was because he was unaware of how he really felt toward her.

Then his thoughts flickered to when she had cried only the day before. No wonder she had cried! She was in love with him! That was why she had cried! He was so careless in the way he had told her he was leaving!

"I'm sorry," he finally told her, breaking off the kiss. "I shouldn't have told you the way I did yesterday. If I had known this was how you felt, I wouldn't have said it like that."

"Don't talk, Matvey," she breathlessly said. "Just kiss me. Please."

"I love you," he whispered against her lips before resuming kissing her.

Irunya sighed against his lips happily. "I love you too, Captain Williams," she breathed, kissing him back. "Ever since I met you."

The two sat there like that for a long time, the kisses becoming more frantic and passionate. Irunya had eventually moved to his lap so she could be closer, but soon even that seemed too far away for her.

"Matvey," she softly said, breaking off the kiss. Her cheeks, as well as his, were flushed bright red. "What do you say we take this somewhere else? I know just the place." She got up and grabbed his hands, helping him to his feet. "No one will bother us there." She pressed her lips to his in a lingering kiss. "Let me love you, if just for tonight."

Matthew, unable to say no, took her hand as she led him away from that park bench and, undoubtedly, toward a place where he knew they would spend the night together.


	5. Chapter 5

Early Fall, 1937, Des Moines, Iowa

Matthew left before Alfred could one evening, his rage burning inside of him. He couldn't control it anymore. Those words that guy said to his brother were just eating him alive. If they didn't bother Alfred, they sure as hell bothered him, that was for sure!

He made his way to the infamous park toward the infamous bench and saw the guy waiting there. He approached him, internally fuming, yet looking composed on the outside.

"Alfred?" the guy asked.

"Are you that fucking dense?" Matthew angrily demanded, crossing his arms. "We may look alike, but there is a significant difference. My brother tolerates bullshit from people like you, but I don't!"

"What are you talking about?" he asked, tensing up slightly.

"I know what you said to him," Matthew stated through clenched teeth. "I know the way my brother is, and that's not the way you should treat someone you claim to care about in that way."

"In what way?" The guy's eyes widened.

There were pounding footsteps as Alfred ran over. "Mattie, what are you doing?" he demanded, panicked. He turned to the guy on the bench. "Oh, hey."

"My brother won't be able to tutor you tonight," the guy on the bench quickly said to Alfred, standing up, horrified. "He got sick this morning, so he sent me to tell him."

Alfred slowly nodded. "Thanks. I appreciate it."

"No problem," the guy awkwardly said before quickly leaving.

Matthew groaned internally before turning to Alfred. "Alfred, I-"

"What did you say to him?" Alfred slowly asked. Tears were building up in his eyes, tears that Matthew knew he had caused.

"I've heard the way your 'tutor' talks to you," Matthew quietly said. "That's not the way someone who cared about you would talk to you."

"And how the fuck would you know that?!" Alfred shouted at him, the tears spilling from his eyes.

"Do I talk to you like that?" Matthew asked.

"You're my brother, Matthew!" Alfred explained as if it were obvious. "It's kind of a thing you have to do!"

"Is it?!" Matthew demanded as he raised his voice as well. "You really want to see if I absolutely have to give a shit about you, Alfred?!" From the look on his brother's face, he could see that he had gone too far, but he couldn't stop himself. "Because I can guarantee you right now that I don't!"

Alfred's voice shook as he struggled to say, "You weren't the first person in my family to not give a shit about me, Mattie." He clenched his fist as his lip trembled. "But I guarantee you that you were the last." He quickly turned on his heel and ran.

Matthew sat there in dumbfounded silence. He knew he should have kept his mouth shut, yet he couldn't any longer. All of his built up frustration over the summer had finally been released onto the wrong person. The only thing he could do now was run after his brother and beg for forgiveness before he did something stupid and made him an only child.

.

Late May, 1942, Ukrainian Border

Irunya led Matthew down a street that looked like any residential street in any country, almost reminding him of the street he had lived on when he was a young boy in Canada. "This is my neighborhood," she quietly explained. "My family is out of town, though." She stopped outside of a large, white house and unlocked a door before leading Matthew in and locking it after them. Her smile was hypnotic to him as she led him down the hall to her bedroom.

Matthew examined the peach-colored walls as he walked in. The soft, tan carpet felt nice on his feet after kicking off his shoes, following Irunya's lead when she did the same. He felt the wind nearly knocked out of him as she tackled him onto her large four-poster bed, yet he got over that quickly as she began kissing him once more.

"Matvey," she softly asked, breaking the kiss, "do you love me?"

Matthew brought a hand up and brushed his fingertips across her cheek. "Of course I do," he answered.

"Then I need you to do something for me," she slowly answered, biting her lip. "When the war is over, Matvey, I need you to come back for me. I do not wish to stay here forever. Please rescue me. Take me back to America with you!" Her voice was nearly pleading at the end. "If you were able to become American citizen, does that not mean I can too?"

"It is hard to do," Matthew said, "but I know an easier way than way I did."

Irunya's eyes widened. "What way is that?"

"Marry me," Matthew softly told her. "When this whole world is done fighting and trying to destroy each other, I will come back here again and ask you properly. But until then, I would at least want to have the hope in my heart that you would agree to it."

"Marry you?" Irunya asked, eyes widened. Her lips met his with a fiery passion. "I would love to!" she excitedly giggled when she came up for air. "But please promise me that you will!"

Matthew traced an "X" over his heart with his finger like he used to with Alfred when they were kids. "Cross my heart," he assured.

"What does that mean?" Irunya curiously asked.

Matthew smiled, realizing she was unfamiliar with American phrases. "It means that may I be struck down by any higher power if I were to lie to you," he explained.

"That is terrible!" she gasped, covering her mouth.

"But at least you know I'm not lying," Matthew assured.

A smile played at her lips. "Matvey," she softly said, giggling before kissing him once more. "I love you." She trailed a few kisses along his jawline and back to his lips. "I have one request."

"What is that?" Matthew asked, blinking.

She rested her head on his chest as her fingers traced hearts on his bare forearm. "I don't want to wait until you return, Matvey. I want the assurance that you love me now." Irunya positioned herself on her hands on knees over Matthew, peering down at him, her short hair framing her lovely face as she gave him a pleading look. "You leave tomorrow, and only God knows when you will be back. So…" Her face turned bright red as her confidence vanished completely and she became timid, moving to sit next to him.

Matthew sat up and grabbed her hand, noticing a shift in her attitude. "What is it, Irunya?"

Irunya's voice was barely above a whisper. "Make love to me," she finally said. She could tell Matthew could barely hear her, so she raised her head and looked him in the eye as she repeated herself slightly louder, "I want you to make love to me, Matvey."

Matthew's face was bright red. He had never expected a girl to make a request like that of him, especially so soon after confessing her love to him. Then again, he never expected to be so certain of wanting to marry someone as he was right now. All he could do was nod absently before Irunya, overcome by a mixture of love and lust began undoing his belt.

Matthew hadn't realized how painfully aroused he was until her hands lightly brushed that area. He blushed as the bulge between his legs grew considerably larger, embarrassed by his lack of control over himself. Sure, he had dealt with things like this by himself, but never with anyone present, especially a beautiful woman like Irunya.

Irunya unbuttoned his shirt and ripped it from his arms, her jaw dropping when she saw his finely toned muscles and abs. She ran her fingers over them in awe before bringing her lips to them, kissing every inch of his glorious, golden skin.

Matthew's breath hitched for a moment before he realized he was holding it. This was really happening. He was going to lose his virginity to the woman every man's heart desired. Yet hers only desired him. His heart was pounding at a speed he never knew was humanly possible, and he knew it would only get faster as they progressed.

Irunya began to mess with the buttons on his trousers. "Matvey, what is it?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"What is what?" Matthew asked, trying to focus his thoughts back to the present and trying to breathe normally.

"Why won't you touch me?" Irunya softly asked. Her lips formed into a pout as she locked eyes with him.

"I just…" Matthew struggled to find words to say. He was so flustered as he dug through his mind for the proper phrasing. "It's not that I don't see you that way, it's just that I don't want to see me seeing you that way. For the past two months, I've been watching men lust after you from the sidelines and now that you're mine I'm so excited that I don't know where to start. And, uh, to be perfectly honest," he stated, blushing, "I've never done something like this before. I don't really know where my hands go or what to do or-"

Irunya silenced him by pressing her lips to his once more. "You think you're the only one?" she softly asked when they pulled apart. "I have been waiting for the perfect man to come along, and now that he's here, I'm determined not to miss out. Just follow what your heart tells you, Matvey. You can't go wrong."

Matthew slowly nodded. He couldn't focus on remaining a gentleman at this moment, because he was certain Irunya didn't want gentleman. Irunya wanted a lover. So that was what he was determined to give her. His hands fumbled with the buttons on the back of her dress.

Irunya smiled widely as her hands reached back to help him with expert ease. She smiled as their hands touched, unbuttoning the final button together. Her dress dropped to the floor, revealing her white undergarments. She then unfastened his trousers and pulled them off, throwing them to the floor. "Matvey," she softly said, "are you ready?"

Matthew gulped, feeling a large amount of pressure building in his chest, yet he knew it was too late to back down now. He leaned back against the headboard, trying to calm his nerves, yet when looking at Irunya he was anything but calm. His heart was pounding so loudly that he was almost certain she could hear it and see it racing in his chest.

Irunya's hands went to the straps of her brassiere as she slid them down her shoulders before unhooking it in the back. She slowly removed it, face bright red as she clumsily dropped it to the floor.

Matthew once more struggled to breathe as his eyes widened. He felt like he was being too perverted as he realized his gaze rested on her large breasts. His soldiers would always bet on if she stuffed her bra before leaving home, but now he knew for sure that she definitely did not, though he would never let the soldiers know. That was his secret to know, and theirs to never find out.

Irunya smiled as she grabbed his hands, slowly bringing them up to rest on her breasts. She moaned out softly at the contact, pressing his hands firmly to them and moaning out slightly louder when he squeezed. "Matvey," she softly sighed out, positioning herself so she was straddling his hips. She arched her back with pleasure as she felt her body burst into inner flames from the waist down.

Matthew, by this time, was painfully hard and was starting to view his boxers and her underwear as a nuisance. He wanted them gone and got the feeling that she felt the same. His fingertips plucked at the top of her high-waisted underwear, hoping he wasn't being too forward.

Irunya got the hint and quickly removed them before pulling at his to show that she wanted his gone as well. Her face was too flushed and her body was far too hot for her to even form a complete sentence at the moment. Yet when Matthew finally removed his boxers, her eyes widened. She had received standard sexual education at school and from her mother, and she had looked after baby boys before, but she had never seen the anatomy of a grown man in person before.

"Matvey," she softly said as she reached out and softly touched it with her finger. Her eyes widened at the reaction from Matthew.

He squeezed his eyes shut, pleasure coursing through his body. An unexpected moan escaped as he became fully erect. He could feel it all building up inside of him now. Without thinking, his hand reached out and grabbed Irunya's, closing her fingers around his length and moving her hand up and down it, showing her.

Irunya caught on quickly, smiling. She was amused by the moans coming from Matthew and wanted to hear more of them. Her grin widened as he continued, moans growing louder, as her hand moved faster.

The pressure inside of him came to a crescendo. "Irunya!" Matthew moaned out as he lost all sense of everything for a moment, releasing all the built of sexual frustration of the evening onto her.

Irunya blinked in surprise for a moment before realizing what had happened. She looked down at her torso, which was drenched in it, yet at that moment she didn't care in the least. "Matvey," she softly said, "you did it wrong."

"What?" Matthew asked, regaining awareness of the situation. He then looked at Irunya and turned bright red, realizing what she was covered in. "Shit, Irunya, I'm sorry."

"You should be," she giggled. "Because you didn't do it right."

"Didn't do what right?" Matthew asked, cocking his head to the side. He was breathing heavily as he felt his sex drive already building back up due to a naked Irunya on his lap.

Irunya's fingers began stroking at his length once more as she watched it start to build back up. "I'll show you," she softly said. She struggled to keep from rubbing her legs together, anxiously awaiting to feel him inside of her.

Matthew breathed heavily, struggling to keep his focus as she worked him back up to fully erect before moving her body up slightly. That was when he realized what she was doing as she slowly lowered herself onto him, moaning out loudly. The feeling of being inside of her was like a euphoria he couldn't even begin to describe.

He was brought back to earth when he saw her face. His euphoria paused as he cupped her cheek in his hand. "Irunya, are you hurt?" he asked, concerned.

She sucked in her breath slightly. "I will be okay," she softly assured. "Just give me a moment to adjust, Matvey." Irunya grunted slightly, wiggling a little and within moments she opened her eyes. "I'm ready," she told Matthew before attacking his lips with her own.

For the next few minutes, the room filled with moans and cries of pleasure before the two of them laid beside each other in the bed, feeling overheated and exhausted, but most of all, in love. They gazed into each other's eyes as they snuggled close to each other, never wanting the night to end, for they knew what the morning would bring.

Irunya struggled to keep her eyes open as she rested her head on Matthew's chest, tracing hearts onto his collarbone. "Matvey, promise me you'll come back for me," she softly said.

Matthew placed a kiss on the top of her head. "I promise," he assured. "I will come back for you, and I will take you away from this place. We will live together in America for the rest of our lives, and I will love you until the day I die."

"That sounds wonderful to me," she softly responded, yawning. Her heart wrenched in her chest. "I don't know how I'll be able to bear it, Matvey," she admitted after a moment.

"Bear what?" he softly asked, giving her a concerned frown.

Irunya looked up at him as her eyes brimmed with tears. "Waking up alone," she said, voice cracking as a tear trickled out and onto Matthew's chest. "But falling asleep alone would be worse…"

Matthew nodded solemnly. "I wish I didn't have to leave, Irunya," he quietly admitted. "Or I wish I could take you with me. But I would never drag you through the battlefield like that. You're safe here for now, and after the war, I will come back for you. We will go back to America together, and we will be happy."

"Happy," Irunya echoed, smiling. "I can't wait to be happy with you, Matvey." She finally lost the strength to keep her eyes open. "Stay with me as long as you can after I fall asleep."

"I promise," Matthew assured, kissing her softly. "Now sleep, Irunya. I'm here right now, and I will write to you always."

"I love you, Captain Matthew Williams," she whispered.

Matthew loved the way his real name sounded when she said it with that beautiful accent of hers, even if she slightly stumbled over it. "I love you too, Irunya Chernenko. Always."

.

The next morning, Irunya woke up to an empty room, yet she was clothed in a nightgown. She smiled to herself at Matthew's thoughtfulness but then sat up and hugged her knees to her chest as her emptiness consumed her. Though she knew it would be hard, she never thought that waking up without him would be this hard.

Her eyes looked around the room. Matthew had cleaned it and even hung up her sundress from the day before on the back of the chair on her vanity. But there was a piece of paper on her vanity with her name on it.

She jumped off her bed and ran to the vanity, heart racing. He had left her a note! Her heart pounded as her mind raced with thoughts over what kind of a note it could be.

Dearest Irunya,

Words cannot express the joy you have brought to me in these past few months. Though it was only a short period of time, you have captured my heart in a way that no woman has ever managed to.

You were the reason I always went to that restaurant, yet I wasn't aware of it until I realized I was in love with you. And that night we danced together was the best night I had while here, other than last night, of course. The song we danced to is one that my brother and I used to listen to a lot back home. Now every time I hear it, your beautiful face will appear in my mind, which will always make me smile. I thank you for that.

I promise that I will return to you after the war, Irunya. You have my word. My loyalty will always lie to you. I hope I proved that to you last night.

I love you, Irunya. Please, always remember that. I hope to see you again soon.

All my love,

Captain Matthew Williams

Irunya blinked back the tears in her eyes as she pressed the note to her heart. She was glad that she had fallen in love with the most wonderful man in the world. She couldn't wait to hear from him again.


	6. Chapter 6

Early Fall, 1937, Des Moines, Iowa

Matthew ran after Alfred, heart racing and frightened adrenaline pumping through his veins. He was terrified for his brother. His mind was in straight-up panic mode. If anything were to happen to his brother, he knew he would never forgive himself for those hurtful words that he said.

"Alfred!" he called out, voice choked by the wind and lack of oxygen getting to his lungs from all of the running. "Please! I'm sorry! I didn't mean it!" He looked wildly around him. All of the running caught up to him and he doubled over. Alfred had always been the one who could run faster and longer than him without having to catch his breath, and Matthew cursed himself for not training himself better.

Matthew's lungs were burning. He gasped for breath, but it wasn't coming to him. He couldn't breathe at all, but he didn't care about that right now. All he cared about was finding his brother. All he wanted was to make sure his brother was going to be okay. That's all he wanted. THat's all he cared about.

He began to take some shaky steps in the direction he thought Alfred might be. People stared and tried to help him, tried to make him sit on the sidewalk benches, but he shook his head and pushed past them, mentally reminding himself to apologize later when he could actually talk, let alone breathe.

His stumbling steps led him to a spot by the Raccoon River, where he found Alfred gazing into the rushing waters. It had rained the past couple days and the water had a strong current. Unable to run, Matthew stumbled as quickly as he could and grabbed Alfred's elbow, falling to his knees. Now that he had reached his destination, he didn't have to hold on any longer.

A few raindrops began to fall from the sky as Alfred looked down at his brother, confused. He didn't understand what was going on. Why couldn't Matthew stand or breathe or talk? When Alfred felt he was the hurt one, why was it that Matthew was the hurt one now? Did Matthew get hurt on the way here?

"Mattie, what's wrong?" Alfred asked, kneeling next to his brother. The rain began to pour around them, but he didn't care about that. All he was worried about was Matthew, whose breath was coming out in short, shaky gasps. "Who did this to you?"

Matthew shook his head at Alfred and still clung to his sleeve. He put his right hand to his chest and moved it in a circular motion to express one thing to Alfred that they learned in a sign language class when they were young. It meant "I'm sorry".

Alfred's eyes filled with tears. "No, Mattie, I didn't mean it," he said. "I really shouldn't take advantage of your kindness to me. Just because you're my brother doesn't mean you have to care about me. I should've learned that from my mom as a child. Family doesn't mean you have to care. It just means you can if you want to." He stood up and heaved Matthew onto his back. "So that's what I'm going to do, Mattie. Something's not right here, and I'm going to find out what. We're going to get you to the doctor at the school, okay? And I won't leave your side until I know you're okay."

Matthew leaned his head on Alfred's shoulder and nodded agreement, struggling to take slow, even breaths. Though the situation was grim and unfair, he couldn't help but let a small smile make its way to his face. He really had the best brother in the world, and would never trade him for anything.

.

Late May, 1942, Military Car

The vehicle Matthew was in stopped. This ride seemed to go a lot faster than the other one did. Maybe because Matthew daydreamed a lot of the way. Also because it was only him and three other people, and the other people slept a lot.

"Damn, I'm going to miss that one waitress from that Russian restaurant," one of the men sighed out.

"You mean the one with the large breasts?" another man asked.

"That's the one," the first man said. "I mean, damn. What man wouldn't miss her? She seemed like a bombshell. It's too bad she froze out every man who even looked in her general direction." He groaned. "Do you think she was secretly as much of a bitch as that tiny one she worked with?"

Matthew clenched his fists in silent fury. How dare they talk about Irunya in such a way! They didn't even know her! She was such an amazing woman, and so much smarter and more pure than they will ever know!

Then he got to thinking. Irunya wasn't as pure as she used to be. And that was his fault. He had taken that innocence away from her. But he had to shake that thought out of his head. She had wanted that. She had practically begged him to do so! It wasn't his complete fault! That was what Irunya had wanted!

"You all right, Williams?" the driver asked, noticing Matthew vigorously shaking his head.

"Huh?" Matthew asked, freezing in place. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"Something must've happened to him," a soldier commented.

"Heh, maybe that waitress got to him, too," the first soldier scoffed. "With a woman like that, a kid like him could never recover. That's for sure."

.

Late May, 1942, Paris, France

Matthew blinked a little when the bright sunlight hit him as he got out of the back of the truck in Paris. It was so bright after being in the back of a truck for nearly three days. He was so tired, and all he wanted to do was sleep. But since it was the middle of the day, he knew that would not be allowed.

"Greetings, gentlemen," a French officer greeted, smiling brightly at them. His teeth were so white they almost gleamed and reflected the sunlight. Matthew almost cringed, but held it in out of respect. "I understand you are all captains?" His accent reminded Matthew of his mother's. She had been French-Canadian, and hearing this man talk made his heart hurt. "I will introduce you to your troops."

Matthew followed, wondering how he would ever last here in France with all of the accents and the gleaming teeth and the charming smiles. True, he was fluent in both English and French, his mother made sure of that, but his French was pretty rusty. He just hoped that things would be easier with time.

Then his mind went to Alfred. He really hoped his brother was okay. Alfred was hard for people to establish a bond with and hard to get along with if you didn't understand him. He just really hoped that people were being nice to him.

His mind then flashed to Irunya, the person he thought of most. His heart ached as he thought of how she must've felt when she woke up alone the morning after they had slept together. The same way he had felt when he had to leave her. But the note he had left was true. He would always love her, and no one else. He was too in love with her to even look at another woman.

"Captain Williams?" the French officer asked.

Matthew looked up at him. "Hmm? I'm sorry, I'm a little out of it. I haven't slept in days."

"That is okay, monsieur. I am just making sure you are aware of who your troops are," he said politely. He gestured to a group. "Here they are." His eyes narrowed. "Wait, one is missing." He sighed. "I know which one it is. He's always causing us trouble, that stupid American."

"Private Jones?" Matthew asked, smiling. His heart soared a little, hoping his guess was right. More than anything, he wanted to lay on his bunk and talk to his brother about Irunya all night, just like how Alfred used to talk about Arthur.

"How did you know, Captain?" the officer asked, blinking in surprise.

"He's my brother," Matthew answered, smiling brightly. "I mean, we probably don't look anything alike right now, considering I haven't had a haircut in a considerable amount of time, but we usually look exactly alike."

The officer looked at him. "Same face," he observed. "I can see it now. You are correct." He sighed. "Private Jones is usually in the barracks. Please go talk some sense into him and let him know you are his captain, please."

Matthew nodded. "Merci," he said, smiling. He then hurried off to the barracks to find his brother.

Sure enough, there was Alfred, sitting on his bunk and tossing a ball against the wall. It bounced back to him and he caught it every time, a grim look on his face. He seemed lonely to Matthew, or maybe deep in thought.

"Al?" Matthew asked, coming up behind him.

Alfred whirled around. "Mattie?!" he gasped out in shock. His eyes were wide and he jumped up, placing the ball gently on his pillow as if it would break. He hurried over to Matthew and picked him up in a crushing hug. "Oh, my God! You're here!"

"That's right, Al," Matthew softly said, hugging his brother back. "I'm here. And I'm going to stay here with you. I'm your captain."

"No way," Alfred said, pulling away. "You're really my captain? That's great!"

Matthew grinned at his brother. "And this time, Al," he began, "I have a story to tell you." He felt a blush cross his cheeks.

Alfred's eyes widened after a moment to show that he understood. "You fell in love, didn't you, Mattie?" he finally asked. "For the first time in your life, you finally fell in love with someone." He stared at Matthew as if he were some alien and then a wide smile crossed his face. "I'm so happy for you, Mattie! Isn't being in love wonderful?!"

Matthew blushed and awkwardly laughed. "It really is, Al," he nervously replied. "It's like nothing I've ever felt in my life."

"So what's her name?" Alfred asked, sitting on his bunk. He leaned easily against the pillows and reserved some room for Matthew to sit as well, patting the spot for him to sit next to him.

Matthew gratefully sat next to his brother, leaning back as well. "Her name is Irunya Chernenko," he stated, almost dreamily. "She is originally from Ukraine, but her family moved to Russia when she was seventeen due to her father's job." He yawned a little. "She's twenty-four, and-"

"Wait, she's older than you?" Alfred asked.

Matthew blinked at him. "Yeah, why?"

Alfred smiled widely. "You get that older woman," he encouraged. "Tell me more about her."

"Anyway, most men like her because she has the largest breasts I have ever seen," Matthew said. "But I think she's just beautiful. She has a lovely smile. Her laugh is so airy and light and makes me want to laugh with her and forget everything else. And the way she says her nickname for me…" He sighed, wishing he could be with her again. Matthew shook his head. "I can't talk about her…"

"You miss her that much?" Alfred asked, inspecting the ball in his hand. It was the same ball he had been playing with earlier.

"I do," Matthew softly said, sighing. He remembered putting a nightgown on her sleeping form and placing a kiss on her forehead before leaving. That note he had written her. Oh, how he hoped she had gotten it…

"I get how you feel," Alfred sighed. "I'm just glad we don't have to get any 'Dear John' letters, you know?" He frowned, looking at the ball. "Our loves can't write to us."

Matthew frowned. "It's a blessing and a curse," he sighed. His curiosity got the best of him. "Where did you get that ball?"

"Leon gave it to me," Alfred said, not taking his eyes off of it. "He said I'm supposed to take care of it because it's his favorite." He smiled a little. "We're going to play catch with it after the war is over."

Matthew smiled, thinking of the innocence in Leon's thinking. "That sounds fun," he said. "I'm glad that you have that to look forward to."

"And what do you have to look forward to?" Alfred asked, turning his head to look at Matthew.

"Irunya," Matthew simply answered. "I'm going to go back to America and buy us a home. I'll fix it up and make it perfect if I have to. Then I'll go back to that stupid Russian town, find her, and take her home to America with me. And we'll be together forever."

Alfred smiled at his brother. "I'm glad that you'll have a happy ending, Mattie," he said. He turned his attention back to the ball. "I hope I get one, too."

"You will," Matthew assured. He, too, looked at the ball. "They love you, Alfred. Arthur loves you so much. I've known that since the day I met him. And Leon wouldn't be the same without you. Alfred, you performed a miracle for that family, whether you know it or not. You belong with them."

Alfred sniffled a little as his eyes filled with tears. "You really think so?" he whimpered slightly.

"I know so, Al," Matthew assured. He leaned against Alfred, resting his head on his brother's shoulder. "If it wasn't for you, Leon and Arthur wouldn't have that bond that they have now. Arthur would still be a drunk. Leon would still be ignored. And Victoria wouldn't be getting her education. Alfred, you helped them. And I'm so happy that you did that."

Alfred smiled proudly. "Mattie, you always know what to say," he sighed out happily. "You're the best brother ever!"

Matthew smiled tiredly. "Hey, can you do something for me?" he asked, yawning. "I haven't slept in a few days. Can I take a nap and you not tell the superior officers?"

"Deal," Alfred said, smiling.

"I owe you one," Matthew said, slowly fading off into a dreamless sleep.

"Family doesn't speak of debt, Mattie," Alfred said, smiling. "We do things for each other out of love."

.

Matthew woke up next to Irunya and smiled. She was still sound asleep, but looked so beautiful as she slept. Something seemed different to Matthew, though. There was something different about the way she was positioned. He decided to take a closer look.

He lifted the blanket slightly and examined her sleeping form a little further. He blinked a little, realizing he didn't have his glasses on and reached for them on the nightstand. But what puzzled him was how he knew they were there. He had never been to this house before.

Before he could look closer at Irunya, he heard a small child crying from the other room. The cry was small and distant, but frightened nonetheless.

"Matvey," Irunya mumbled, sleepily swatting at Matthew. He turned to her as she said, "You go this time. Please let me get some sleep."

Matthew smiled and nodded before kissing her forehead. "You sleep, Irunya."

"Irene," she sleepily corrected with a yawn.

Matthew looked puzzled but got up. His body led him around the house he had never been to before, but he just followed the screams until he found himself in a room with a little boy in a crib. The boy looked just like a smaller version of Matthew, but without the glasses.

"Hey there, little guy, what are you so scared of?" Matthew asked, picking him up. He cradled the little boy close to him and rocked him. The boy snuggled into Matthew's arms and chest and fell asleep within minutes. Matthew smiled at him. Though he didn't know the little boy's name, he knew for sure that he was definitely his son. There was no mistaking it at all.

When Matthew returned to his bedroom, Irunya was fast asleep once more. His eyes were used to the dark by this point and he instantly noticed what was different about her. She was pregnant, very pregnant!

Matthew blushed deeply. This was what he wanted with Irunya. This was what he had always wanted with Irunya, yet he knew this was just a dream he was having. Why did his dreams have to be so cruel? He cursed his head for it as he laid back down. If it was a dream, he might as well enjoy sleeping next to the love of his life.

As he laid there, all he could think of was how he didn't want to wake up in France. He didn't want to wake up in France. He wanted to stay here with Irunya forever. She was too perfect not to.

.

Matthew opened his eyes to find Alfred softly snoring next to him. It was dark outside and he sighed softly. He hated it in France and wanted to go back home to America with Irunya. He was so done with all of this. So done with the military. Once this stupid war was over, he was certain he was going to resign and live happily with Irunya and have a family and a normal life. That was all he wanted in the world.


	7. Chapter 7

Winter, 1937, Des Moines, Iowa

Matthew sat back against the wall on his bunk as Alfred slept on his own. He couldn't sleep that night. In fact, Matthew had been having trouble sleeping since his first asthma attack. He had never been more terrified in his life over the fact that he couldn't breathe. He had never related more to the phrase "fish out of water" in his entire life. And even though he was treated for it, he was so scared that it would happen again.

He sighed and hugged his white teddy bear close to him. "Kumajiro…" he sighed to it. "I ruined my brother's life, didn't I?" He frowned. Why did he have to get involved in Alfred's love life?

Ever since the day of Matthew's asthma attack, not only was Alfred always careful and cautious around him, but he was also mopey. Alfred used to always be happy and bouncy and full of life. Nowadays, Alfred would choose to walk instead of run. He would always look over his shoulder for Matthew, treating him as if he were some breakable object instead of the brother that he used to wrestle and spar with in the open fields in the summertime. How Matthew wished they could go back to those days before this past summer had happened!

A tear slid down Matthew's cheek as he snuggled that worn out bear closer to him. He didn't care that he was fifteen and still snuggled a teddy bear. Right now, that's what he needed. His heart felt like it was broken, but he didn't know why. He felt jealous, but he didn't know what he was jealous of.

"Was Alfred really in love?" he whispered to Kumajiro. He knew the bear couldn't talk back, but it still felt better to talk to something. "I wonder what it's like to be in love, Kumajiro…" He thought for a moment, but realized something that he didn't know if it made him sad or not. "I don't think I'll ever fall in love. I don't think I want to…I just...I don't think that kind of stuff is for me."

He began to question himself. Why did he think that? Why wasn't love for him? He had seen his parents in love. He had seen Alfred in love. Didn't he want something like that for himself one day? Why didn't he see himself falling in love one day? Why didn't he want to fall in love? Or did he want to fall in love, but was scared no one would love him back?

That was too much for his mind to comprehend so late at night. He decided to lay down and sleep, tucking his bear in next to him. "Goodnight, Kumajiro," he softly said to the bear. "You really do give the best advice, you know that? Even if you are full of stuffing."

.

Mid-June, 1942, Paris, France

Matthew sat with Alfred in a bar, both brothers bored out of their minds. They didn't even know why they were there. Neither of them were interested in drinking. The other guys from the base kinda just dragged them there, so they went along to take the drunk ones back later on. The bartender kept giving the two of them weird looks that made both of them uncomfortable. Neither had to say a word to the other to know how they felt about it.

Alfred sighed. "I want to go back to London," he said to Matthew. "I don't like it here. Arthur was right. The French aren't all that great, and their accents are nauseating."

"Watch it," Matthew warned, glancing over at him. "My mother was French Canadian. She had an accent just like this."

"Then all French accents but Genevieve Williams's," Alfred corrected, causing Matthew to smile. "I just don't like it here. I want to go back to London."

"I want to go back to Russia," Matthew softly said, his voice barely heard over the rest of the troops in the bar. "Irunya is waiting for me…" He thought of when he left her, sleeping in her bed. She had looked so peaceful. He didn't want to imagine how much her heart had ached when she woke up alone in the morning. "I need to return for her."

Alfred blinked at him. "You really are in love, Mattie. I knew it." He smiled knowingly. "I'm glad that you can understand how it feels now."

"But now I know the pain of what it's like to be so far from the one you love," Matthew sighed, tracing small hearts on the table with the fingertip of his index finger. "I can't stand it, Al! I want to see her so bad. I need to know if she's okay. It's been a month, and I can't stand it. I feel like I can't breathe. I'm suffocating without her."

"Oh, Mattie, you've got it bad," Alfred sighed. He let out a low whistle. "You know, maybe you do need a drink." Alfred raised a hand to wave over the bartender.

"Alfred, I swear to God, I will fucking castrate you if you wave that god-awful bartender over here," Matthew threatened, jaw clenched in fury. "I mean it."

Alfred grinned easily at his brother. "Oh, Mattie, you're scared of him? What's there to be scared of?"

Matthew felt uneasy, feeling the bartender's eyes on them. He glanced over to see the French man's blue eyes trying to meet with his and quickly looked away. "I just don't like the vibe he give is all," he sighed. "Al, I just really want to leave. Can we go?"

Both brothers looked toward the door when they heard a shriek come from a young girl outside, followed by a man yelling in French. Matthew was horrified when he heard what the man was saying.

"Alfred, I don't care who that girl is, we have to help her, and we have to go now," he said, standing up. Before even he knew what was going on, he ran to the door, Alfred on his heels. "Wait a minute, isn't that…"

And right there, before his eyes, Matthew saw a girl he had only seen once in his life, a girl he never would have dreamed to see in this sort of situation. Her skirt was torn from the man tugging on it and her silky, black hair hung to her waist instead of being tied up properly. Tears poured from her pretty, blue eyes as she stared at the man, terrified. It was none other than Arthur's old nanny, Victoria.

Alfred ran to her and stood between her and the man. "Leave her alone," he snarled to the man, looking more angry than Matthew had seen him in years. He had his teeth barred and everything. If he were foaming at the mouth, Matthew could have compared him to a rabid dog.

Matthew walked over to her and gently placed his hands on her shoulders. "Victoria, it's Captain Williams. I don't know if you remember me, but I am a friend of Arthur's. You are safe now. We're going to take you home, okay?"

Victoria turned to him and threw her arms around him, sobbing into his shoulder, terrified. "You remind me of Alfred," she softly said once she was calm. "You look so much like him."

Matthew smiled. "Victoria, Alfred is right in front of us. He won't let that guy hurt you anymore."

Suddenly the man's fist met with Alfred's face, sending Alfred stumbling back into Matthew and Victoria. Matthew's pent up anger at being transferred to France and having to put up with that obnoxious bartender all night flared up inside of him and he passed Victoria on to Alfred and asked him to calm her down. No one punched his little brother, especially after harassing a kind young girl like Victoria!

Matthew laid into the man, swearing at him repeatedly in French as he punched him over and over in the face. It was like he was an entirely different person when he was this angry. He could barely hear Alfred begging him to stop. He could barely hear Victoria sobbing behind him. All he could focus on was damaging this man the way he damaged Victoria and Alfred.

Alfred finally grabbed him under the arms and pinned him. "Mattie, stop!" he shouted. "I think he gets it!"

Matthew was breathing heavily as he looked around him and realized how many people were now watching what was going on. Every man in their battalion was watching, along with everyone else who was in the bar, including the bartender. Every person on the street was watching. People were leaning out of windows that lined the streets. No one said a words. There was only dead silence.

"Let's just take Victoria back to her dorm, okay?" Alfred suggested. "And then let's get back to the base. I think you need to sleep. All of these sleepless nights are really getting to you, huh, Captain?" He nodded to everyone. "There's nothing to see here, folks. Go back to living your merry lives."

Matthew felt himself being ushered away by Alfred and Victoria, who seemed to have recovered by this point. He let them lead him down the street, away from all of the madness that had happened.

"Mattie, you could've killed that guy!" Alfred nearly shouted once they were a few streets away. "I get that you were trying to help Victoria, but that was too far. And I thought Canadians were peaceful, eh?"

Matthew scowled at him. "If you could've heard his intentions for Victoria you would've done the same," he snarled. "I don't regret what I did, and I don't care if I get demoted. I did what was right."

"He's been like this ever since he fell in love," Alfred said to Victoria. "It's his first time ever."

"You're in love, Captain?" Victoria asked, raising her eyebrows in interest. "Who might be the lucky lady who holds your heart, if I may ask?"

"Her name is Irunya Chernenko, and she is a goddess," Matthew said. "She lives in Russia."

Victoria smiled brightly. "Well she sounds lovely."

Matthew smiled. "She is." He thought back to that perfect smile of hers. A smile found its way to his face and he felt that familiar swell in his chest that he got every time he thought of her. He had never been in love, but he loved this feeling.

Alfred led the way to Victoria's dorm, with her giving him directions. He kept an arm linked with hers so no one would bother her. Then again, Matthew doubted anyone would mess with any girl who was being escorted by two military personnel. Especially one who had made such a scene on a street.

When they had reached the dorm, Alfred knelt down and kissed Victoria's hand. "Give Arthur and Leon my regards," he softly told her. "And if you ever have another late class, let me know in advance. In fact, how about you let me see your schedule, and I will escort you home after every class?" He stood back to his full height and smiled. "It would be no bother to me."

Victoria nodded. "Of course. Please, come inside. I cannot invite you past the front door, but it's safer than the streets, I can assure you." She opened the door and gestured the brothers inside. "I will return in a moment."

Matthew looked around and then saw a few girls peeking at him and Alfred from some of the doors that were slightly cracked open. He had never really noticed girls as females until after Irunya, but now it was like he was hitting puberty all over again. And this time, he was hitting it "properly". Yet every time he thought of a girl in that way, he thought of Irunya's face instead of any other girl. And eventually Irunya's perfect body replaced any other body type Matthew's mind could imagine. For the rest of the time Matthew was imagining women, it was only Irunya, which he had absolutely no problem with at all.

Victoria returned to them moments later. "This is my schedule for late classes," she said, handing Alfred a piece of paper. "Sorry it took so long. I just decided to write down when I get out of class and where so you can just pick me up."

Alfred smiled at her. "Thank you kindly, ma'am." He brought her hand to his lips and kissed it as Matthew did the same with her other. "Until we meet again, Victoria. And please, give them my regards."

"I certainly will, Private Jones," Victoria said with a smile. "Captain Williams," she said, grabbing his sleeve when he turned to leave, causing him to turn back to leave. "Thank you for what you did for me tonight. Even if you went too far, I still appreciate the gesture. Irunya Chernenko is so fortunate to have a man like you." She blushed. "I hope that one day I can find a man even half as great."

"Don't settle for any less," Matthew told her, smiling back. "And thank you, Victoria. I hope that our paths cross again. If I am permitted, I would enjoy walking you home with my brother."

"I would enjoy that as well, Captain," Victoria said, grinning. She curtseyed to both men. "And I bid you both goodnight."

.

The next morning, Matthew was called into a commanding officer's office. He knew what it was about. It was for beating a civilian senseless.

"Williams, I assume you know why you're here," Officer Delacroix stated.

Matthew nodded. "Oui, Monsieur," he stated.

"You realize you can be demoted for assaulting random civilians, correct?" he asked Matthew. "We have it here that you did not even look into the situation before completely laying into this man."

"That is untrue, Monsieur," Matthew stated, standing his ground. "He had plans to kidnap and rape a civilian woman, and he assaulted one of my men."

"It was that retarded one, wasn't it?" the officer asked. Matthew felt his jaw clench as the officer went on. "I don't see why you waste your time with that hot-headed guy anyway. He's just going to end up hurting himself or someone else. I don't see how they let someone like him in the forces."

"With all due respect, Private Jones is my younger brother," Matthew slowly stated. "That is why he was transferred into my unit. Because I can work well with him."

"But still, that civilian woman is none of your concern. It's not like you knew her."

"With all due respect, I do know her, Monsieur," Matthew stated. "She was the nanny of a friend of mine." He felt he was getting out of line, yet he didn't really care at that moment. Officer Delacroix had called Alfred retarded, and that was something Matthew would not stand for. "I know her."

"Stand down, Captain," Delacroix commanded, glaring at Matthew. He stood up, a few inches taller than Matthew. "Or do you forget your place?"

Matthew held Delacroix's gaze evenly. He had no idea where all of this confidence was coming from, but he was glad to have it at that moment in time. It was all he could do to keep from trembling where he stood, to keep from passing out on the spot out of sheer intimidation. Ever since he lost his virginity he felt like a part of him had died and become a new him, a better him.

Delacroix smirked at him. "You have balls, kid," he commented to Matthew. "I respect that in someone your age. I'll let your misdemeanor slide this once. If I ever hear of something like that again, you're demoted, got it?"

"Oui, Monsieur," Matthew stated, saluting the superior officer.

Delacroix patted him on the back, chuckling to himself. "Good, now get back to training."

Matthew quickly left that office, not wanting to awkwardly stand in the presence of Delacroix any longer. He was done with all that. Yet he was surprised at how easily he got away with that. And how easily he got away with disrespecting a superior officer. It seemed like ever since he started seeing himself as more of a man, he began to get treated more like a man. And he enjoyed that more than almost anything in the world. Almost. Irunya still came first.


	8. Chapter 8

Once training for the day was done, Matthew went to find Alfred. He sighed when he found him out in the field behind the base, writing a letter. He crouched next to him. "Writing to Arthur?" he asked.

Alfred jumped. "Mattie!" he gasped. He took a moment to catch his breath. "Yeah, I am. I've been putting it off because I miss him so much…" He sighed. "I haven't seen you write a letter either. Same reason?"

Matthew sighed and sat down. "You caught me," he admitted.

Alfred handed him some paper and an extra pen. "Here, write to her. Since you're so crazy about her, it should be easy, right?"

Matthew took the pen and paper and gulped. It wasn't easy. His hands began to shake and he had to set the pen and paper in his lap and clasp his hands firmly together. His vision began to blur with tears as he bit his lip so hard he was surprised he didn't bite all the way through. He finally shook his head. "It's hard," he finally said. "I don't know what to say. It was easier when she was right there. Now that I'm so far away, I have no idea what to tell her. She probably forgot all about me by now anyway…"

"Why would you think she forgot about you, Mattie?" Alfred asked, cocking his head to the side.

Matthew looked over at Alfred. "Are you fucking kidding me?" he asked, voice barely above a whisper. "Everyone forgets me, Alfred! I never make an impression! No one ever remembers my name!" He grabbed tufts of grass and ripped them from the ground, throwing them in the air. "It's so damned frustrating! Why do they always remember you, but not me?!"

Alfred just silently sat there and let his brother rant. He knew it wasn't his fault, but he couldn't help but feel guilty for being the one that was always remembered by everyone.

Matthew took some deep breaths to calm himself down. "It's not your fault, Al," he softly said. "You're remembered because you're great and you make an impression. I'm always too quiet to. That's why no one notices me. You are loud and proud. You know how to communicate and talk to others. I don't."

"Then why are you the captain and I'm the underling?" Alfred simply asked.

Matthew blinked at him for a moment. "What?"

"Mattie, you're a captain for a reason," he said. "It's because you're a good leader. It doesn't matter how loud or quiet you are. You were chosen to lead those me. Not me." Alfred smiled. "And I think you're pretty damn good at it. I wouldn't want anyone else to be my captain, or my brother for that matter."

The older brother smiled. "Oh, stop it." He looked down at the pen and paper in his lap. "If you can write to Arthur, then I know I can summon the courage to write to Irunya." He picked up the pen and began to write.

Dearest Irunya,

I am so sorry I did not write to you sooner. Things have been busy. But that is no excuse. You deserve the truth. And the truth is that I missed you too much to write to you.

I talk about you a lot. In fact, I brag about you to my brother. The men that were transferred with me often talk about you as well, but I keep what happened between us our little secret. After all, you are more precious to me than anything this world has to offer.

You are a great person, and I am sure you know that. I hope you don't ever forget me, like most people tend to. God, I wish you could write back to me. But just knowing that you got these letters is enough for me.

All my love,

Captain Matthew Williams

Satisfied with his letter, Matthew smiled and kissed the paper, causing Alfred to snicker to himself. Matthew reached over and punched his arm, glaring over at him. He went back to smiling at the letter. He was proud of what he had written. His only hope was that Irunya truly loved him back. With all the doubt going around in the world, he hoped that it was true.

.

That night, Matthew sat back in his bunk and thought about his letter. He hoped it would make it through the censors and make it to Irunya. He hadn't written anything bad or inappropriate, so it should make it through. His heart pounded wildly in his chest as he thought of her.

Irunya's laugh echoed in his ears. Her smiled was burned into the back of his eyelids when he closed his eyes. Her silvery-blonde hair blowing in the wind and the sparkle in her blue eyes was still as lively as he remembered.

Matthew felt a pain in his heart. It ached so badly as he longed to hold her in his arms once more. He longed to kiss those soft pink lips again. He wanted to feel her skin on his skin once more, to have their bodies become one again.

He groaned softly as he remembered where he was, rolling over onto his side. He hated being in France. Matthew wanted to be out of there. He wanted to go home and take Irunya with him. He wanted to start the family that he dreamed about. He wanted that son that looked just like him, and a daughter who would hopefully look like Irunya.

Matthew closed his eyes and tried to fall asleep again. He hated staying up all night and being alone with his thoughts. It bothered him. All he wanted was to get some good rest for once, instead of thinking all night. He was tired of waking up exhausted and sad.

He didn't know how to explain this sinking feeling in his gut whenever he thought of Irunya. He knew he was in love, but why was he always so sad when he thought of her. Shouldn't he be happy because he was in love? Why did he feel sick and exhausted just by thinking of her? He was so in love. But if he was, why did he feel like he was slowly crumbling on the inside? Why was he falling apart from the inside out?

Matthew had heard of depression before, but was this what it felt like? Some of his troops had told him that they had felt depressed, but he never believed it could happen to him. He always believed himself to be stronger than that. But was he really?

.

"Mattie, what's eatin' ya?" Alfred asked Matthew the next morning. He could tell his brother was distracted at breakfast. "I can tell you ain't sleeping well. What do you do all night?"

"I just think a lot is all," Matthew mumbled, nibbling on a piece of toast. He felt numb inside, but he didn't know what to do about it. What was this feeling that he felt? It was terrible!

"What do you think about?" Alfred asked, resting his head on his hand. He took a bite of his toast and a sip of coffee, making a disgusted face. The two flavors did not mix well in his mouth.

"Everything and nothing," Matthew sighed. He sipped at his coffee. He would need the caffeine to keep him going through the day. His body ached from lack of sleep. Everything hurt inside of him. He felt dead inside ever since he got to France. It was like the country was sucking the life out of him.

Alfred frowned. "You don't look too good, Mattie," he observed. "Are you doing okay?" He was very concerned. "Ever since you got here, you've been acting kinda odd."

Matthew looked up at him. "Odd?" he asked. So other people were starting to notice it, too. This wasn't good. He frowned. "I'm fine, Al. You don't need to worry about me. Everything is going to be okay."

"How do you know that when you're not even okay?" Alfred challenged from across the table.

Matthew gave him a sharp look. "I just told you that I'm okay," he snapped. "Respect me as your superior officer!"

"You're my brother first!" Alfred shot back, glaring at him.

Matthew glared back, refusing to back down. Yet why was he getting so defensive over something like this? "Older brother!" he reminded.

Alfred's breathing was getting heavy, but he did not drop his glare. He had his Iowa stubbornness, and he refused to lose this fight with his brother. He knew he could take on Matthew easily, but he also knew that Matthew could punish him if he wanted to. At the moment, he didn't care at all.

"Stand down, Jones!" Matthew commanded, slamming his hands on the table and standing up.

Alfred slammed his hands down and stood as well. "No!" He held Matthew's gaze evenly, nostrils flaring. "There's something wrong with you. You're not the same."

Matthew's jaw clenched. He knew he wasn't the same person he was before going to Russia. Irunya had made him into someone better, someone to be proud of. But then again, why was he so angry with Alfred? Why was he angry in the first place?

Matthew felt a tap on his shoulder and turned to see Delacroix. "What's this?" Delacroix asked. "Can't control one of your own men?"

Matthew quickly turned to him. "Non, monsieur," he quickly answered. "Nothing like that. Private Jones and I were just having a discussion that got a little too heated."

Delacroix stared down his nose at Matthew in a way that made Matthew feel belittled. "Well, Captain, make sure your discussions don't get too heated. If you can't control all of your men, what does that say about your skills as a leader, hmm?" He walked away, hands clasped firmly behind his back.

Matthew felt a burning rage in his gut as he watched Delacroix walk away. He wanted to pick something up and throw it at him. He hated that man so much that it made him sick!

"Mattie, I didn't mean to get you in trouble," Alfred slowly said.

"Of course you didn't," Matthew snapped, grabbing his breakfast tray. "You don't ever mean anything you do. Just don't talk to me right now." He stormed off to be alone. The last thing he wanted to do was take out the rest of his pent up anger on his brother, even if he did deserve it.

.

Matthew took out all of his pent up anger on a punching bag for nearly an hour. Sweat coated his entire body by the time he was done. He felt a billion times better as well. He no longer felt angry, just exhausted and desperate for a shower.

As he walked toward the showers, he heard some voices talking. They were two that he knew. One was of a French troop of his named Levesque, and the other was Alfred's. He stopped just before the doorway and listened in.

"So I heard Captain Williams is on his way to getting demoted if he keeps acting up," Levesque said. "I thought you said he was a nice guy."

"He really is," Alfred insisted. "He's just had a lot going on. There have been a lot of things going on. He hasn't had the support from me that he needs, and I need to tell him that I'm sorry."

"Look, I know you two are brothers and all, but maybe you should step down," Levesque warned. "If he goes down, there's a strong chance that you'll go down with him, Alfred."

"You think I'll abandon my brother in his time of need, Jean?! Are you out of your fucking mind, you stupid frog?!" Alfred's voice had an angry tone to it. "Family is the only thing that matters to me! Mattie is all I have left! We joined together! If he goes down, you bet I'm going down with him!"

Matthew smiled at Alfred's loyalty to him, but then realized that a fight was about to break out and thought he might as well stop it before something came of it and he got in even more trouble that day. He went into the room and saw the two red-faced and in fighting stances.

"All right, you two, let's calm down," Matthew said. "Let's calm down here." He sighed. "Alfred, come with me. Leveque, just stay away from him for now, okay?" He grabbed Alfred's arm and removed him from the room. "I appreciate the sentiment of you defending me, but do you have to get in fights on my behalf?"

"This morning wasn't your fault," Alfred said. "I wasn't being cooperative." He bit his lip. "I'm sorry, Captain."

Matthew smiled at him. "No need to be so formal, Al. Like you said, I'm your brother, right?" He sighed. "I guess my lack of sleep really got to me this morning. It seems that when I actually do sleep, I always wake up exhausted and sad."

Alfred frowned. "Mattie, that's not good. You sound like the guys who get depressing letters from home. The last time you felt this way was when Dad and your mom died."

"Yeah," Matthew agreed, slowly nodding his head. He frowned. "But I don't know why I feel so sad. I'm in love, and I have good things going for me."

"Is it because she's so far away?" Alfred asked him. "Maybe you're getting depressed because she's so far from you. Mattie, I haven't seen you this depressed since we were twelve." He sighed. "I don't want to see you depressed again."

Matthew shook his head. "I won't stay depressed, Alfred," he assured. "I'm stronger than that." Even as he said the words, he wondered if he truly meant them.

"I really hope so," Alfred said. "After all, you have a lot of people who look up to you, especially after seeing the way you stand up for yourself against Delacroix. Everyone thinks he's a total dick anyway." He smirked. "You inspire a lot of people."

Matthew smiled to himself. "Thanks, Al." He wished he could say what he truly thought of Delacroix, but since he was a superior officer, he knew that wasn't allowed. If it were to get back to Delacroix that he said that to one of his men, he could easily get demoted.

Alfred laughed. "Levesque would probably kiss that guy's ass if asked," he said. "I never liked that guy. So when he said those things about you today, I just couldn't handle it. No one talks about my brother like that."

"I'm glad that you defend me," Matthew said, smiling.

"It's because I heard that you defended me against Delacroix," Alfred said. "And you defended Victoria as well, even risking demotion to do so." He smiled at Matthew. "That takes a lot of courage, Matthew. It makes me proud to say you're my brother. You know what's right."

Matthew smiled. "What is today? Compliment Matthew Day?"

Alfred shrugged, grinning. "We could make it that."

The older brother laughed. "I was kidding." He then remembered that he was coated in sweat. "Hey, I'm going to take a shower. Can you stay out of trouble for a half hour, Al?"

Alfred scoffed in mock offense. "Have more faith in me, Mattie."

"Just making sure," Matthew laughed. He headed toward his bunk to get his clothes. "Half an hour. I'll talk to you then."

As he showered, Matthew thought of how he felt at the time and compared it to when his parents died. It was a similar feeling. Alfred was right, though. He was acting similar to the way he acted when his parents had died. But was it really the same?

.

Matthew felt much better after his shower. He didn't feel all grimy and gross anymore, and he felt as if his bad mood went down the drain with all the sweat that seemed caked onto his body. His mood was so great that he whistled on his way to find Alfred.

Alfred was on his bunk, bouncing Leon's ball once more. He looked contemplative once more as he talked to the ball between bounces. "Be good," he said to it. He bounced it against the wall and caught it. "Listen to Arthur." Another bounce and catch. "He loves you so much, buddy."

"Alfred?" Matthew asked, hoping he wasn't interrupting anything. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," Alfred answered, holding the ball carefully in his hand. He gazed at the ball with a look of fondness in his eyes. "I'm just talking to Leon through the ball. Kinda stupid, I know, but I mean it works for me."

"If it's something that helps you, then it's not stupid at all," Matthew answered. "I wish I had something of Irunya's to talk to," he admitted. "Maybe it could make things easier."

"What if I told you I found something I think might be hers," Alfred said. "I was doing your laundry while you slept one time and I found a green ribbon in one of your jacket pockets with a note. I didn't read it, but I kept it safe for you in my stuff."

Matthew's heart pounded in his chest. "Why didn't you mention this sooner?" he asked, a hint of panic in his voice.

"I was waiting for the perfect moment, Mattie," Alfred said. "And I also kinda forgot…" He reached into a box where he kept a couple photographs that Matthew recognized as Leon and Arthur and Alfred on many occasions.

Alfred then pulled out the mint green bow that Irunya had worn in her hair the day she and Matthew had slept together along with a note. Matthew had wondered when Irunya had slipped those things into his pocket without him knowing.

Tears filled his eyes as he held that bow in his hand. His fingers were careful with it, as if it would break at the slightest touch. He held it close to his heart as the tears spilled down his cheeks. "Thank you, Al," he softly whispered as his fingers carefully unfolded the note.

My Beloved Matvey,

I love you more than words will ever say, and I will wait for you as long as it takes. I trust you when you say you will come back for me. Let's get married when this war is over. I want nothing more than to be married to my amazing Captain Williams. I never knew what forever meant until I met you. That was when I knew that I would love only one man forever. And that's you.

All my love,

Irunya Chernenko

Matthew smiled to himself. "Alfred, I'm glad you waited to give me this," he finally said. "It means more now than it would have the day I got here."

"I thought it would." Alfred smiled happily, knowing he did something right.

Matthew hugged his brother. "You are the greatest little brother in the world. I really mean that." He began to laugh as tears rolled down his face. He hugged his brother tightly to him, grateful that he finally had something of Irunya's to keep him going.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To all of my Francis Bonnefoy fans, I apologize for this chapter. He's better in my other fics. Much better, I swear!

June 25, 1942, Paris, France

Matthew felt uncomfortable sitting in the bar without Alfred. His men had asked him to come along, claiming he never went out much with them, which honestly was the truth. Alfred was out walking Victoria home from class, so Matthew had no choice but to be dragged along. He was very uncomfortable, though. He hated the looks he was receiving from the bartender.

"Good evening, mon ami," the bartender greeted, winking at Matthew as he walked over. "How may I serve you?"

"Please don't call me your friend," Matthew sighed, looking away. "I don't even know your name." An uncomfortable shiver ran down his spine.

"But are we not all friends if we fight for the same cause?" the bartender asked, raising his eyebrows. "And do forgive me. My name is Francis Bonnefoy. And what might your name be?"

"I'm Captain Matthew Williams of the American Military," he stated, bored. He wished Francis would just go away. His discomfort was becoming more and more noticeable by the minute. "For the record, I'm not here to drink. Please go serve someone else."

"If you are not here to drink, then what are you here for?" Francis asked, leaning easily against the table.

Matthew glared at him over the top of his glasses. "The men in my unit made me come with them. Now would you kindly leave me alone?"

Francis clicked his tongue at Matthew in a show of disapproval. "That is not the proper way to thank someone for their hospitality. Please, allow me to tempt you with a drink, non?"

"Non is correct," Matthew said, exasperated. "Now please leave me alone. I'm not interested and would like to be left alone." How many times would he have to say that before the man took the hint?

"So rude," the Frenchman sighed. "All of you Americans are all the same."

That sent Matthew's blood boiling. "I'm Canadian," he stated through clenched teeth. "Sure, I have American citizenship, but I am naturally born Canadian and proud of it. Now please go away."

"Why do you want me gone so badly?" Francis asked, ignoring the calls of the other patrons asking him to fill their drinks. "I never did a thing to you."

Matthew met his eyes evenly, unblinking. "But I can tell by your looks the kinds of things you wish to do to me," he quietly said so no one else could hear.

Francis's eyes widened. "Oh really? Then what kinds of things would those be?" His voice was just as quiet as Matthew's, his eyes narrowing in challenge.

The Canadian's eyes narrowed back at the Frenchman's, refusing to back down now that he had come this far. "Don't think I don't know what your preference is," he hissed. "Men with blonde hair and blue eyes? I notice the looks you give to my brother and me every time we come in here, Francis," he spat. "And don't you dare try anything on him."

"So only on you then?" Francis asked with a wink.

Matthew gulped. He didn't like where the conversation was going. "Please leave me alone," he said. His heart skipped a beat when Francis didn't even look away. "You have other customers besides me."

"Oh, do I?" Francis asked, voice starting to become nauseating to Matthew. He winked at the Canadian and walked away. "I shall return, mon ami."

Matthew's head began to spin. He had to get out of there! He slapped his hands onto the tabletop as he shakily stood up.

"You okay, Captain?" a man in his unit asked him as he walked by. "You haven't had anything to drink, have you? Do you need help with anything?"

Matthew shook his head. "I need to get back to the base," he quickly said. "Lots of work to be done." He glanced over at Francis, who seemed busy with other people. It seemed like there he was too busy to notice Matthew slipping out if he left that instant. "Give my regards to the other men, but I must get going."

"We'll see you back at the base then, sir," the man said, saluting him.

Matthew quickly slipped out and ran down the street, turning the nearest corner and leaning against the wall of the nearest building, trying to catch his breath and calm his racing heart. That was too close. He was terrified! Francis was not a man to be messing with like that! This wasn't the same as standing his ground with a superior officer! He had no idea what a man like Francis was truly capable of!

"Mattie?" he heard Alfred ask.

Matthew looked up to see Alfred approaching. "Al!" he gasped out. "Al, let's go back to the base!" He grabbed Alfred's sleeve as he hurried off, pulling him in the direction of the base. "I can't stay here!"

"What's going on?" Alfred asked, confused. "Is everything all right? You see scared."

"Everything's fine," Matthew insisted as he practically dragged Alfred down the street. "Why wouldn't it be? I'm fine. You're fine. We're all just fucking swell!"

Alfred planted his feet on the ground, causing both to come to a sudden stop. "Mattie, what's going on? And tell me the truth."

Matthew sighed. "I don't want to talk about it until we're a safe distance away, okay? I don't want anyone overhearing. It was the bartender, but I won't say anymore than that right now." He groaned. "Please, can we just get out of here?" he practically begged.

The younger brother's eyes widened. "Matt, you look terrified!"

"And what if I am?!" Matthew demanded. "Let's just go!" He tugged on Alfred's arm and Alfred picked up his feet and let himself be dragged once more.

.

Matthew was still nearly trembling by the time they were back to the base. "Al, you of all people know that I have no problem with people who have that preference," he softly said, voice shaking. "You know that!"

Alfred slowly nodded. "I know that, Mattie. You don't have to keep saying that. I get it. You don't have a problem with people like me." He opened the door to the barracks for Matthew and ushered him inside, explaining with gestures that Matthew was "drunk" to passersby. "It's okay. I know what you're saying. I get what you're saying. I'm not mad. No one is mad at you."

"Oh, he was," Matthew said, voice faltering. "I had never heard a voice that chilling in my life…He was threatening me, Alfred. Threatening me!"

"Are you sure it wasn't your imagination?" Alfred asked, scratching his head. "Threatening you?"

Matthew turned to Alfred, horrified. "You don't believe me, Al?" he softly asked, voice growing softer and softer with each word. "I thought you, of all people, would. You've seen the way he's looked at us…"

"Mattie, stop," Alfred said. "I didn't mean it like that. What I meant was…"

"I'm going to go and lie down," Matthew said. He felt the room spinning. His own brother didn't even believe him. Maybe it was because Alfred was gay and didn't see it as that big of a deal, but to Matthew that was huge! He felt sick and wanted to get away from everything for awhile.

"Do you want me to-"

"No," Matthew quickly said before walking away from his brother and to his own barracks. He found his bunk and curled up under his blanket like he used to. Part of him wished he still had Kumajiro. Oh, how he wanted that stuffed bear more than anything at that moment! But unfortunately, Kumajiro was back in America at the academy with the rest of Matthew and Alfred's belongings that they couldn't bring to war with them.

More than anything, Matthew wanted his parents. He wanted his dad to tell him it was all in his head, and he wanted his mom to hold him and tell him that everything was going to be okay. He wanted to go back to being six again before he decided to join the stupid military academy. Maybe if he had never joined, his parents never would have died! But then he would have never met Alfred…

Would it be worth it to go back in time and alter the past if it would take Alfred away? If it would take away the greatest friend Matthew had ever known? If it would bring back Matthew's parents, but take away the only other person who took the time to get to know every detail about him?

Matthew then thought of another thing. If he had never gone to the academy, he would've never joined the military. If that had never happened, he would have never met Irunya. It had to be worth it. It had to be! Irunya was worth everything! She was the only reason to breathe, to live! Irunya was the only reason to do anything in this godforsaken life!

Matthew sighed, coming back to reality. Perhaps he had been too hard on Alfred when they had come back from the bar. He should probably apologize to him. But he couldn't find much motivation to get out of bed.

Lately he had found it increasingly difficult to get out of bed. It had started taking longer and longer to get out of bed in the mornings and all day he wanted nothing more than to just crawl back into it again later. He couldn't explain why, though. It just felt like it was better than anything else the day had to offer. Some days off he would fake sick and just stay in bed all day. But he tried not to do that too often because it worried Alfred every time. Matthew wasn't normally one to get sick.

Instead of getting out of bed like he wanted, Matthew just laid there instead. He laid and overthought everything, just like he always did. Alfred was probably mad at him anyway, so he would just apologize tomorrow after training. If Alfred even wanted to speak to him…

Matthew hated thinking. It was like being trapped inside of a prison of his own thoughts. He hated it so much! Every thought got more and more depressing as the day went on until at night he could barely sleep. Each morning he would wake up more exhausted and sad than the last. It was getting more and more tiring to stay happy for Alfred, but he couldn't let on how sad he truly felt because he didn't want Alfred to know and start to worry. Especially since Alfred thought he was doing just fine. He couldn't let his little brother down now!

.

The next morning, Matthew sought out Alfred after training. "Hey," he softly greeted. "I wanted to apologize for yesterday. I guess I was just overwhelmed and overreacted. I've been having a rough time lately, and I'm really sorry."

"Don't worry about it," Alfred said, dismissing it with a wave of his hand. "We all have moments like those. I'm sure you've dealt with mine. You're fine, Mattie."

Matthew smiled. "I'm so glad to have a brother who is so quick to forgive," he said, breathing a sigh of relief. "I thought you would be mad at me."

"Why would you think that?" Alfred asked, confused. "It wasn't even that big of a deal. Mattie, you're acting so weirdly. You're always so sad and tired. Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," Matthew assured, forcing a smile to his face. "I'm not sad at all, and I get the same amount of sleep that you do, Al."

Alfred shook his head. "Why do you feel like you have to lie to me, Mattie?" he asked, hurt. "Stop lying and tell me what's really going on. I know that you're not really sick when you lay in bed all day on your days off. It's because you're sad. You miss Dad and your mom. You miss Irunya. You can't hide things like that from me because I know you like I know myself. Please stop lying to me, Mattie."

Matthew hung his head. So Alfred had seen through it. "Look, I'm sorry about all of the lies. I thought that if maybe I told you that, then I could believe it all myself…"

Alfred sighed. "Please stop lying to me and tell me the truth." He frowned. "I want to know what's bothering you."

"I think I'm depressed," Matthew admitted. "I feel as if I've received a 'Dear John' letter, but I haven't. In fact, I've received the opposite, and I have so much going for me after the war. It's just the war in general. I hate that I have to do all of this, Alfred. I hate being in the military. I just want to go home…I want to go home with Irunya and start a family and never want to have to raise a gun again…" He looked up at his brother with pleading eyes. "Is that too much to ask?"

Alfred shook his head. "No," he answered. "That's not too much to ask." He put a hand on Matthew's shoulder. "And I wouldn't look down on you for retiring after this stupid war. You have things you want to do with your life. I want you to do them."

Matthew smiled. "Thanks, Alfred. It means a lot to me to have your support, as the last living member of my family."

Alfred smiled back at him in a carefree manner. "It's because I know you would do the same for me, and that you will do so when the time comes. Mattie, I'm pretty sure I'll be with Arthur forever, whether we get married one day or not. I don't ever want to be in love with anyone else." He smiled wider. "And if I ever do get married, I expect you to be my best man."

"You'll be mine," Matthew assured him, smiling.

He was so relieved to discuss after-war plans with Alfred for once. It was something that made him very happy and good-spirited. He enjoyed talks like these when Alfred would talk about one day possibly marrying Arthur and Matthew would talk of marrying Irunya. Though he had never spoken of that dream he had that first day in France where Irunya was pregnant and they had a young son. That was his alone to know about and long for and desire.

.

Matthew found himself in that bar again that night. Luckily he had Alfred with him, but it was still unbearable to have that bartender making eyes at him from behind the bar as if to say he had won. And as much as Matthew tried to ignore him, he couldn't. It was starting to piss him off. He couldn't ignore that nagging feeling in his gut that he felt when looking at that French bastard!

"Mattie, you're turning red," Alfred warned. "You need to ignore him, or it'll eat you alive. Seriously, stop it."

"Then tell him that," Matthew snarled through clenched teeth.

Alfred rolled his eyes. "You men are so territorial," he sighed. "You're like children. If you keep this up, I might just go back to the base and leave you here to glare at him all night by yourself."

Matthew's eyes widened and his glare instantly disappeared as he looked over at Alfred. "You wouldn't dare!" he gasped.

"Then stop it," the younger brother warned. "Don't test me, Matthew. Because I will leave."

Matthew sighed and hung his head, grumbling to himself about how unfair Alfred was being. He even sulked a little, like a child.

"I can hear you," Alfred reminded. "I'm right here, Matthew."

The older brother looked up at him and glared. "Fine, then go back to the stupid base. See if I care. I can take care of myself."

"If that's what you really want, then I will," Alfred said, getting up. He rolled his eyes. "You're acting like a child over this, Mattie. He's a person, just like me. He's nothing to be scared of, just like me." That was when Matthew realized that he had offended Alfred by being scared of Francis flirting with him. "Goodnight, Mattie."

Matthew watched Alfred walk to the door, unable to apologize for what he had done the past few days. He felt hollow and empty after realizing how much he really had hurt his brother's feelings with how scared he was of another gay man who wasn't related to him. It made Matthew disgusted with himself. How could he have been so insensitive? Alfred had feelings, too!

"Scared your brother off, I see," Francis observed, walking over. "Of course, with an attitude like yours, it's no wonder."

"Just get me a fucking drink," Matthew snarled at him. "The strongest stuff you have."

"Aren't we just in a drinking mood?" Francis suggested, raising his eyebrows with interest. "But I'll get right on that, mon ami."

.

An hour later, Matthew was too drunk to keep his thoughts straight as they poured out to an ever-patient Francis, who was sitting across the table from him. All the other soldiers had left. Francis had closed the bar early, yet he had kept Matthew there for some reason that he couldn't remember for the life of him.

"You're still a very suspicious person," Matthew slurred at Francis, pointing his finger and moving it back and forth at the Frenchman who kept moving in his line of vision. "I mean, it's only me and you here and you haven't charged me yet for any of this alcohol yet."

"Think of it as a favor between friends, non?" Francis said, winking at him.

"A favor?" Matthew asked, blinking in surprise. "Then what kind of favor would I be doing for you in return? I don't understand you at all! What do I have to-"

Francis had had enough of Matthew' incessant talking and leaned across the table, eagerly pressing his lips to that charmingly drunk Canadian's, silencing him. "Come on, Mathieu. Let's go."

"Go where?" Matthew asked, eyes widening, but he felt himself being pulled from his seat and being dragged to the living quarters of the bar.

After that, everything became a blur, and Matthew was too drunk to remember a thing.


	10. Chapter 10

Matthew woke up later than everyone else in the barracks. He didn't wake up on his own, though. It was Alfred's panicked voice that brought him out of a deep and fitful slumber. He was so sore in all areas below his waist. His stomach churned with every moment as his head threatened to explode from the sudden burst of light when he slowly opened his eyes.

"Al?" he softly asked. He squeezed his eyes shut and threw an arm over them. "Al, I don't feel well…"

"Mattie, what happened to you?" Alfred asked. There were tones of panic in his voice. He sat on Matthew's bed, jostling Matthew slightly, causing him to groan in agony. "What's wrong with you? Are you okay? When you didn't show up to lead drills or training this morning, I was so worried!" His voice had cracked. "You look terrible! Are you sick?"

"Yeah, I'm sick," Matthew softly said, trying to remember what had happened. "I feel like I'm about to vomit, Alfred. Maybe I drank too much last night…"

"But you don't drink, Mattie," Alfred softly said. "Did you drink last night?"

"I did," Matthew struggled to say, fighting the vomit that threatened to come up his throat. He hated himself so much at that moment in time. He had let Alfred down, and worst of all, he couldn't remember a thing after he started drinking.

"Why?" Alfred asked. "Why did you drink last night?"

"You were mad at me," Matthew softly said. "I was upset and I was scared. Francis brought me the strongest liquor he had and I drank and drank…" He sighed. "I just can't remember what happened, Al. I'm trying to, but I can't remember…" He shifted a little and gasped in pain. His buttocks hurt so bad, but he couldn't figure out why.

Alfred leaned toward Matthew, jostling him again by accident, causing him to groan in pain once more. "Mattie, what is it?! What hurts?!"

Matthew sucked in his breath as he struggled to sit up, but he just couldn't. "I'm so sore, Alfred. And I don't know why. I feel like there are bruises all over my body from my knees to my waist…"

Alfred's eyes widened in understanding. "I'll kill him," he snarled.

"What did you say?" Matthew asked, opening his eyes. He ignored the headache he had as he stared at his brother, who was now wearing a look of hostility. "Alfred, what's wrong?"

"Matthew, do you not understand what that bartender did to you?" Alfred asked, tears in his eyes. "I'll fucking kill him!" he nearly shouted.

"No one is killing anyone, Alfred," Matthew softly said. "What happened? I don't remember a thing."

Alfred frowned. "Matthew, this will sound like an awkward request, but it's necessary. Let me see your thighs."

Matthew pulled his blankets up over him. "Are you crazy?" he hissed. "No!"

"You said you felt like they were bruised, right? So then how about you look and tell me if they are?" Alfred asked. His face pleaded Matthew to do it. "Please, Mattie. Just do it."

Matthew sighed. "Fine." He lifted his blanket and the elastic of the pants he was wearing to look at his thighs. He didn't even need light to notice the sickening purple bruises on his inner thighs. They were long and slender, almost like fingers. "There are bruises," he softly said, bringing the blankets back over him. "They're on my inner thighs, and they're slender and purple. Why does it matter?"

Alfred sucked in his breath and held it for a few moments. "I will fucking kill him," he hissed, exhaling. He sighed and looked at Matthew. "There's not an easy way to say this, Mattie. But I think you were raped last night." He looked around for people listening, but no one was. "Think about it. You were drunk, so you wouldn't remember. You said he had threatened you. And this morning you're sore all over with bruises on your thighs."

Matthew's eyes filled with tears at the realization of Alfred's words. "No…" he softly said. "That kind of thing doesn't happen to men our age." He brought his blanket up over him as if hiding his whole body other than his head. "Don't be ridiculous, Alfred…"

"I'm not," Alfred insisted, eyes wide. "Matthew, you need to report what he did to you."

"No," Matthew stated. "You know as well as I do what happens to men like that here in Europe. He runs a respectable bar, people enjoy him, and he seems to get along with many people. I'm not going to ruin someone's life for my sake, Alfred…"

"Matthew, this is the kind of thing people's lives should be ruined over!" Alfred insisted.

"No!" Matthew nearly shouted. "I'm not going to." He threw the blanket over his head. Matthew didn't have to see his brother to know how angry he was. He could hear Alfred's breathing from under his blanket.

"I am not fucking around, Matthew Williams," Alfred snarled. "You need to tell someone!"

Matthew threw the blanket off of his head. "And just who the fuck am I going to tell, Alfred?!" he demanded. "Delacroix?! You know as well as I that he'll blame me for being irresponsible and I'll get demoted or worse! I'm probably in enough trouble as is for skipping out this morning!" He gripped his head in his hands and groaned. "Please just kill me, Alfred. I just want to die. I'm miserable and in pain, and I don't want to go on…"

Alfred's tears streamed down his face. "Mattie, please don't say things like that…" he softly said. "You're all I have…" He sighed out. "If I follow your wishes, will you promise not to say things like that?"

Matthew sighed. "You mean you won't kill the bartender if I don't say things like that?" he asked. "If that's what you're saying, then it's a deal."

Alfred frowned. "Then I'll agree to your terms." He sighed. "Mattie, I hate that he did this to you, and I want to kill him. But I'll refrain for you. Only for you." He brought his hand up to wipe away his tears. "I don't know why you want to help him out after he did this to you, but if you insist on it, then I won't argue with you for now."

Matthew groaned. "Can we just drop this subject now?" he asked. "Help me lie to Delacroix about why I didn't make it this morning."

"I already covered for you," Alfred said. "I said you weren't feeling good last night, so they already know you're 'sick'." He groaned. "Is there anything I can do for you, Mattie? Anything at all?"

Matthew sighed. "Could you get me some water?" he asked. "And possibly a bucket? I feel like I'm going to vomit, and with me feeling this way I won't make it to the toilets."

At the mention of the way Matthew was feeling, Alfred frowned. "I'll be right back with both." He quickly stood, jostling Matthew and making him groan once more. "Sorry, Mattie. I'll be more careful, I swear!" He then rushed off to get the items Matthew requested.

Matthew groaned and laid in bed, trying to wrack his brain. The last thing he remembered before everything got all fuzzy was Francis kissing him. But he thought that was all that Francis did. What if it was someone else on the way back to the base? Then again, if Francis had kissed him, then who was to say he didn't do anything else to him? He knew it was going to be hard, but once he was feeling better, he would have to confront Francis about it. Just the thought of looking at the man made his stomach churn even more. The burning hatred for that man was strong in Matthew, especially if he had done what Alfred thought.

.

Matthew was in bed for two days, getting assistance from Alfred whenever he needed to get up to use the restroom. He was miserable and hated himself for drinking that night. Due to the alcohol, he had let his guard down and couldn't remember what had happened to him. One thing was for certain, though. Someone had definitely done something to him. There was no doubt about that.

"Good to see you up and at 'em, Captain," one of his men greeted his first morning back to training. "I'm glad to see you feeling well." He stood at attention and saluted.

Matthew saluted him back. "Thank you, Smith. It's good to be back. I am feeling a lot better." The truth was, he felt just the same, he just had to act like he felt better so Alfred wouldn't worry. But he knew how easily Alfred could see through him. He just wished he could fool Alfred for once. That would make things so much better.

Alfred even stood at attention, a rare occurrence for him. "Glad to have you back, Captain Williams," he stated, saluting his brother.

Matthew smiled as he saluted him. "I couldn't have done it without you, Private Jones." He addressed his entire unit as he said, "At ease, men." He clasped his hands behind his back and paced in front of them. "You have probably all been wondering where I was these past few days. I have been very ill, and I'm still not at my best, but I'm trying today. And that's what I want from you all. If you're not feeling your best either due to something in your life, all I ask is that you try. I am not asking for perfection today. With that said, please run your drills."

Without a doubt, that was the most motivated he had seen his men in a long time.

.

Matthew eased himself into a sitting position on a bench as he and Alfred sat with pens and paper. "So is she sure these will get to Leon on his birthday if we send them off today?"

"She's positive," Alfred said. "They'll be in the mail by tomorrow morning, which is when hers will be going." He smiled. "You should've seen his face when he found out you two have the same birthday, Mattie. His smile could barely fit! He thought it was the coolest thing!"

Matthew smiled. "I'm glad, Alfred." He began to write a short letter to Leon for his birthday. "He's a really smart kid, that's for sure. You were pretty smart at his age, too."

Alfred smiled as he wrote. "Yeah, he's a good kid. I feel like I almost have bragging rights to him as well. He's almost like a son to me in a way, I guess." He blushed. "I don't know. I've only known the kid for a few months, but I have a deep connection with him and Arthur, you know?"

"Maybe one day I'll have my own kids," Matthew mused. "And their Uncle Alfred will be their favorite uncle."

"Won't I be their only uncle?" Alfred asked, smiling at Matthew.

Matthew laughed and shook his head. "No, Irunya has a brother our age, and there will also be Arthur, right?"

Alfred smiled. "That's right. Arthur will also be your child's uncle." He laughed. "And then Leon will have even more cousins than just Blair and Arthur's other brothers' kids."

Matthew smiled. "Alfred, don't you see it?" he asked. "You have more family than just me. You have Arthur and Leon as well. Don't forget that. They're just as important because they're the family you chose."

"You're right, Mattie," Alfred said, grinning. "So I had better treat them right and write to them more often than I do now. And you should do the same with Irunya. Don't ever give her even a week to doubt your love for her."

"Yeah, that's right," Matthew said with a laugh. "Oh, Alfred, you'll love her. She's wonderful!" He smiled as he thought of how beautiful she looked on the day they had spent together. "I have never loved any woman the way I love her, and I know I'll never love any other the same."

Alfred smiled warmly. "I'm glad you found her, Mattie. She sounds good for you. I can't wait to meet her and welcome her into our family."

"She would love that," Matthew told him. "Especially coming from you. I'll be sure to bring her through England on our way to America, because I know you won't leave Arthur."

"No way in hell would I leave him," Alfred confirmed with a shake of his head. "I would never leave Arthur. He's already been left, and I never want him to experience that again." He smiled. "He is my destiny. I can feel it."

Matthew grinned. "Then you better stay by his side forever," he said. "Because he is one lucky guy if he gets the loyalty of my brother. I'm glad he earned it."

Alfred blushed. "Arthur deserves everything I can give him," he said. "Especially putting up with me being gone like this. Same with you and Irunya. Give her the world if you can, Mattie. She deserves it all."

"She deserves everything I can possibly give her," Matthew agreed. "And that's what I plan to give her. Everything that I can."

"Good," Alfred said. "A girl like that deserves everything."

.

Matthew laid in bed that night. He was feeling at least a little better. He was still sore as the day was long, but at least he wasn't hungover anymore. His bruises were fading fast and he only felt them when walking and running as his legs rubbed together against his pants. At least he was feeling better.

He didn't know what to do about Francis. Part of his was terrified of talking to him. What if Francis was the one who did that to him? Just the thought of that sent chills down his spine. He didn't want to think about that. It made him sick.

His mind once again drifted to Irunya. He wondered how she was holding up. It had been almost two months since he had left Russia. He hoped she was doing well and that she was okay. His heart raced as he thought of everything they had done together, from dancing to sleeping together. He wanted, more than anything, to hold her again and to kiss those soft, pink lips. He hoped his letters were reassuring her.

Matthew sat up and got into his suitcase. He dug to the bottom and found her bow, just where he kept it. He held the small thing in his hand and kissed it softly. "Irunya, I'll come back to you," he whispered to it. "You're my future, the only thing I have to look forward to. We'll be so happy together. Just wait a little bit longer, okay?" His hand held the bow tightly in it as his fist closed around it. He held it close to his heart as he sat on his bunk and closed his eyes, lying down. "I love you, Irunya Chernenko."

Inside his head, he could almost hear her sweet voice say back, "I love you too, Matvey."

He smiled to himself as he thought of her. He thought of her silvery-blonde hair and how he wanted to push it behind her ear. He thought of his hand on her waist as he danced with her. His mind went to what it felt like to kiss her for the first time, and the emotions he felt when he heard her tell him she loved him for the first time.

Matthew smiled as he thought of her. It made him happy to have someone to think about when times got hard. She made everything worth it in the end. If Irunya wasn't worth it all, nothing was. That was what he always told himself. It was the most true thing in his life at that time.

He closed his eyes and thought of her as he drifted off to sleep. His mind always felt at ease when thinking of her. She was so wonderful! How could he not be at ease? And that was how he knew for the first time in the past four nights he would sleep well.

.

July 1, 1942, Paris, France

Matthew woke to Alfred pouncing onto his bunk. He opened one eye as his hand fumbled around for his glasses. It was so early in the morning. What could he possibly want? He blinked at the window. The sun wasn't even up yet! The sky was just starting to lighten up!

"Happy Birthday, Mattie!" Alfred whispered excitedly, careful not to wake anyone else. He was grinning widely. "How are you feeling?"

Matthew yawned and stretched. "You know, I actually forgot that it's my birthday today," he admitted, slipping his glasses on. "Isn't that just a thought? I remember when we used to stay up all night on the thirtieth and the third just so we could be awake the moment our birthdays came around?" He chuckled softly to himself. "Oh, how I wish I were still a kid sometimes."

"Don't we all?" Alfred asked him. He sighed. "I just hope today is the best day that you'll have in France." He smiled at Matthew. "I woke up extra early just so I could be the first one to wish you a happy birthday!"

"Well thank you, Al," Matthew said, smiling. "I greatly appreciate it. I'm glad you didn't forget like I did." He sat up and stretched, looking out the window, which faced to the north. "Happy Birthday, Leon Kirkland," he quietly yawned toward the window. "I hope your birthday is just as great as mine, little guy."

Alfred smiled. "Arthur will make sure of that," he assured. "Just like how I'll make sure you have a great birthday." He gestured to himself with his thumb. "Leave it to your brother to give you a great birthday to remember."

Matthew smiled wider. "I can't wait to see what the day has in store then." He got up and stretched again once standing. "I think I'll go take a shower to start off my day. Since we're up before dawn, I know I'm sure to get a nice, hot shower." He grinned at Alfred. "Yeah, this birthday will be great!"

He went to the showers and took a nice, hot shower, just like he had wanted. He was happy his brother had remembered his birthday. It was official. He was twenty years old, an official adult. No longer was he a teenager.


	11. Chapter 11

August, 1942, Paris, France

Matthew still hadn't gone back to that bar yet, making him feel as if he let Francis have the last laugh. But at that moment, he almost didn't care. He had finally recovered from what happened, and he hoped he never had to experience something like that again. It was awful to him. He was completely traumatized from it.

Alfred sat on Matthew's bunk. "I want to write to Arthur, but I just can't do it, Mattie," he sighed. "It's just so hard, you know? I just can't do it because he can't even write back to me. How do I know if it's even getting to him anyway? There are so many factors in it."

"You're thinking way too far into this," Matthew sighed, yet he let his brother continue as he thought of a new training regimen. "Just write him a damn letter."

"Easy for you to say," Alfred said. "When was the last time you wrote to Irunya?"

Matthew looked up from his notes. "That is none of your business," he stiffly stated to his brother. "I write to her at least once a week, if you must know." He huffed and went back to his notes for his troops, writing them in both English and French. "So you should write to Arthur since you've only written to him twice."

Alfred nodded and sighed. "I guess so. It's just hard. Because then I feel bad that I only wrote to Leon once. Then I remind myself that Leon can't really even read right now. But then I think about when Leon will be able to read if he'd want me to write then. And how old were we when we started reading, Mattie?"

"First off, breathe," Matthew began, pointing at Alfred with his pen. "Second, we started reading when we were about seven years old. So we were around Leon's age."

"Fuck, Matt! I need to write to him, too!" Alfred nearly shouted.

Matthew smacked his brother with his notebook. "Calm down, Al! You're making a fool of yourself! It's fine to only write to Arthur and include a side note for Leon. Like a 'tell him hi for me' sort of thing." He sighed and went back to writing. "Do I have to think of everything today?"

"Mattie, what's got you so aggravated anyway?" Alfred asked, cocking his head to the side. "You seem very irritable today."

"It's Delacroix," Matthew sighed. "He's making me come up with new training regimens for my men. I have to have two new ones to try out by tomorrow. So if you could please stop talking so I can write them up, that would be great."

Alfred nodded his understanding and mimed zipping his lips shut. He stared at the blank paper in front of him, determined to write something on it to Arthur, yet not motivated enough to. Instead, he began to rock back and forth.

"Stop that, it's distracting," Matthew grumbled, glancing up from his notebook. "I will hit you with this again. Don't test me." He felt so irritable and cranky from everything going on in his life, but he was especially pissed off at Delacroix, resenting that man's mother for giving birth to him every moment of every day. "I'm really not in the mood for it."

Alfred sighed. "Fine, I'll go somewhere else." He picked up his stuff and walked away. "Next time, you can just say so. I hate when you drop hints and make me feel stupid."

"Sorry, but either way your feelings get hurt. You're a fragile person. I find this method more effective," Matthew stated without looking up from his notebook.

"I'll remember that," Alfred warned before walking away.

"You always say that," Matthew carelessly reminded. He rolled his eyes as he kept writing. Now that his brother was out of the way, he could continue with the regimens. Damn that stupid Delacroix! Matthew almost wanted to storm into his office and demand to know what was wrong with the original training regimen!

"Calm down, Matthew," he softly told himself. "You can't just go and tell people off, no matter how unreasonable they may be." He grabbed the notebook with both hands and shook it like he wanted to shake Delacroix. It helped relieve a little bit of the stress, yet it got him nowhere as he began to write again.

.

Matthew laid in bed that night, dreading having to wake up in the morning. It was the worst time of day for him. Mornings were the absolute worst. Everything seemed to drag on forever for him, and he just couldn't get a grip on reality or anything. He hated it. But as he came to realize, he was just starting to hate everything in general as time went on, not just getting out of bed anymore.

He like to think of happy things as he fell asleep, though. He thought of Irunya, the only thing that could even make him smile anymore. He used to be so proud of the fact that he was a captain in the military. He was so proud of that position, but ever since he got transferred to France, he had grown to resent it. Delacroix was a good reason to hate everything about life but Irunya.

Matthew couldn't wait to be back home in America with Irunya. Hell, he couldn't wait to even be in Russia with Irunya. Anywhere with Irunya sounded wonderful to him. Just as long as he got to be with her, and not with Delacroix.

His hatred for Delacroix was almost equal to his love for Irunya. That was how much he hated that man. Delacroix was the bane of Matthew's existence. He knew that much was for sure. There was no one else on earth who could get Matthew's blood boiling just from him hearing their name. Just him.

Yet Matthew always had to be civil with that damn man. He just made it so hard to be nice to him with the way he always looked down his nose at everyone! It pissed Matthew off to no end! He just wanted Delacroix to disappear or cease to exist suddenly, whichever came first, it made no difference to him.

.

Matthew was extra groggy the next morning. He was so tired of waking up earlier than everyone else so that he would be out of bed at the same time as them. It made him even more cranky during the day, but he knew it was necessary. If he was late to morning training, he would never hear the end of it from Delacroix, and just the thought of having to talk to or look at that man was enough to encourage Matthew to get out of bed so he wouldn't have to.

Something about this morning seemed different to Matthew, though. For the life of him, he just couldn't get out of bed. He hated it, too. It was making him mad that he couldn't. He had no motivation. Not even Delacroix could scare him out of bed, and that was saying something. He just couldn't figure out what was wrong with him, and it was starting to make him nervous. As much as he hated to admit it, did he have depression? Was that what was wrong with him?

Matthew didn't want to think about what that could mean for him if he was depressed. It could mean the end for him as a captain in the military. They could kick him out of the military and lock him away for it, especially if Delacroix were to say he was around firearms all the time. That would be just his luck as well, getting locked away so he could never return for Irunya like he promised to.

Matthew sluggishly drug himself out of bed. He slumped against the wall as he went to take a shower to wake himself up a little more, but the whole time the water poured on him, all he wanted was to disappear down the drain with it. It seemed preferable to the current situation he was in. And only when he realized how absurd that kind of thinking was, he drug himself from the showers and back to his bunk to put his dirty clothes away.

"Good morning, Mattie," Alfred greeted when Matthew walked out onto the training field. "What's on our new regimen thingy?"

Matthew scowled at him. "Wait until everyone else is here, will you?" He sighed. "Look, I'm sorry. I don't mean to snap at you first thing in the morning, but Delacroix is on my ass about everything right now and I'm really stressed out. I barely slept last night."

Alfred frowned. "Are you sure you want to stay being a captain, Mattie? You're not you anymore. You stopped being you when you came to France. I don't like this side of you." He crossed his arms and huffed. "It's almost like you're not even my brother anymore. What happened to the old Matthew Williams? I don't like this new guy. If you happen to come across the old Matt, could you send him back this way?"

Matthew sighed. "I'm trying, Alfred, okay? I have a lot going on."

"Like what, moping over Irunya?" Alfred challenged. "You don't see me moping, and I'm just as lovesick as you are! You're not the only one hurting, Mattie!" He glared at Matthew. "I'm also hurting because of what happened to you back in June! I want to kill that French bastard who runs that bar!"

"For the last time, Alfred, I'm not ruining some man's life over someone as meaningless as myself!" Matthew yelled back. "You're out of line! Either you straighten up, or you pay the consequences!"

Alfred glared at Matthew for a few moments before dropping his gaze and sighing. "Fine." He looked away. "I'm just afraid I'll never be straight enough for you," he snarled angrily at him. His breathing was heavy and ragged through his anger. "Just fuck off, Captain."

"Excuse you?" Matthew demanded, but Alfred had already stormed off. "Alfred! Get back here! I'm not through with you!"

"Well I'm through with you!" Alfred shouted back without turning around. "I'll talk to you when I'm damn well ready!"

Matthew had no words to say, and he knew better than to argue with Alfred when he was in one of his royal moods like this, so he just let him go. Besides, there were no witnesses, so there was no one to tell Delacroix that Alfred got away with disrespecting him yet again. He sighed as he watched Alfred disappear over the lawn, the distance between them getting larger and larger with every step his brother took. Matthew wanted to run after him and say he was sorry, but he just couldn't bring himself to do it. He was too miserable to motivate himself to do anything.

Instead, Matthew sat on the grass for a few moments, the morning dew seeping in through the seat of his uniform. He laid back onto the grass, feeling it in his hair, cold and wet. He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment before he began doing sit-ups until he felt like he was going to vomit all over the grass. His hands clutched his stomach as he sat in the grass, unable to move. He regretted every choice he had made that morning, especially getting out of bed. If only he hadn't gotten out of bed. Then he wouldn't have gotten into an argument with Alfred, causing him to take it out on himself and work out until he felt the urge to vomit everywhere.

Matthew just wanted to take back everything at that time. He was so filled with doubt that he could barely think straight anymore. There was just too much to think about. His mind could never focus on one set thing anymore unless if it was either his love for Irunya or his hatred for Delacroix, never anything else. And that bothered him so much. Why was his hatred for Delacroix overpowering nearly everything else in his head? He just didn't understand it.

.

Alfred found Matthew later. "Look, about earlier…"

Matthew looked away, choosing to focus on something else. "Look, let's forget it. I can't talk about stressful things right now, Al." He sighed. "I'm trying not to stress myself out. I can't keep stressing myself or I might kill myself or something."

"Please don't say that," Alfred softly said. "Don't ever say that you'll kill yourself, Mattie. If you actually were to kill yourself, I don't know what I would do." He wrapped his arms around his brother, hugging him close to him. "Don't bear every burden on your own, Mattie. Let me in. Let me help. You need me, and I need you. We'll never make it otherwise."

"I'm sorry, Alfred. I'm just too stressed out right now," Matthew sighed. "I don't mean to worry you. And I'll be fine. I can take care of myself. After all, I am a captain in the military. I can't be in charge of other men if I can't handle myself."

"Maybe you shouldn't be a captain anymore, Matthew," Alfred quietly said to him. "And before you get angry, just hear me out. I worry so much about you right now. Your condition is getting so much worse with every passing day. I know that you struggle to even get out of bed, and that you just lay in bed on most days off. Maybe it would be best if you just stepped down."

Matthew couldn't believe what Alfred was saying. "Step down? I can't just do that, Alfred! That would be letting down my country and all of the men that I am in charge of! Not to mention that Delacroix would never let me hear the end of it! How could you even suggest something like that to me?!"

Alfred sighed. "Mattie, please stop that. Hear me out. You're so stressed all the time, and you're always pushing me away."

"I am not," Matthew argued, but he knew deep down that Alfred was right. He had been pushing him away. Ever since Alfred caught on to how bad things were in his mind, Matthew had been slowly distancing himself, and he hated himself for it. But he only did it because he thought it was what was best for Alfred.

"Even you know that you're lying," Alfred said. "I know that you know that's a lie. Mattie, I don't know why you're pushing me away, but I know it has to stop soon. You're miserable, and you'll have no one if you keep it up. I don't want you to be by yourself. It's lonely, and it'll make me worry about you more than I already do. I'm just so scared that you're going to kill yourself or something."

"Alfred, I'm not going to kill myself," Matthew sighed, yet deep down even he didn't believe himself. Lately things had been so bad that not even the thought of being reunited with Irunya could keep him happy. He felt like he was slowly going braindead and numb, unable to feel normal human emotions anymore. "Please stop worrying about me. I'll be fine."

"And what if you're not?" Alfred asked. "What if one day I wake up to find out that I'm an only child? What then? You won't be there to tell me what to do next. I'll be all alone, and I'll probably resent you for the rest of my life and be left to wonder why you left me all by myself."

Matthew shook his head slowly. "Alfred, please don't say that," he softly pleaded. "I can't listen to you talk like that right now."

"Then when, Matthew?" he asked. "You're never ready to have reality thrown into your face these days! When did I start acting like the older one here? When did we switch personalities? When did I start caring more than you do?"

"That's not true!" Matthew weakly argued, but once again, he knew Alfred was right and that he was in no position to argue against his brother. "I care! I really do! It's just-"

"Just what, Mattie?!" Alfred demanded. "It's just that you can't control your depression anymore, and it's eating you alive from the inside out! You're worse than the guys who get 'Dear John' letters, and you know it! Only the thing is, you have so many things going for you in life! You have so many things to be happy about! So why the fuck are you so sad and depressing?! Why is it so hard for you to get out of bed in the mornings?! I don't understand! Make me understand! Help me understand!"

Matthew gave him an incredulous look. "So much going for me?" he softly asked. "I could get demoted at any given moment if anyone hears you talking to me like that, Alfred. I was raped by a bartender because I let my guard down after offending you. I care too much about the people I love and it always comes back to bite me in the ass in the end! That's what I fucking have going for me! I bet by the time I get back to Russia at the end of this stupid war, Irunya will be married to someone else or over me! Then what will I have, Alfred?! You tell me!" His breathing was heavy as he glared at his brother. "Then there truly will be nothing for me to live for!"

Alfred's face resembled that of a kicked puppy. "I'm not going to continue this conversation, Mattie. I tried to talk to you reasonably. But even I don't matter enough to you. You have just made that perfectly clear." He tipped his cap to his brother and walked back toward the barracks.

Matthew took a step after Alfred and froze. It was true. What he had said did make it sound like he really didn't care about his brother at all. "Alfred, I didn't mean it like that!" he called after him, but he knew it was no use. He was cruel and heartless these days.

Alfred was right. Ever since they had come to France, Matthew had become cruel and irritable. He had just turned into a monster that even he himself didn't know. He had lost control of himself and was losing everything he once cared about. And for what? A role in the military that he didn't even want anymore.

Matthew sat back in the grass again like he had done that morning. He grabbed handfuls of it, ripping it from the ground. "I hate it here," he kept grumbling to himself. "I hate France. I hate everything about this country. It's destroying me and everything I love. I want to go home…"

.

Matthew laid in his bed that night and thought about many things. He thought about Francis taking advantage of him when he was drunk and vulnerable. He thought of Delacroix and his constant lectures. But most of all, he thought about his constant fights he kept getting into with Alfred. With every thought, he came closer and closer to a decision he felt he wanted to make. No, it wasn't a want to him anymore. It was more of a need.

He got out of his bunk and crept out of the sleeping quarters, unaware of the shadow following him. His footsteps were stealthy as he crept to the gun and ammunition stock. This seemed like the only reasonable thing to do at that point as he crept out onto the lawn. It was the only thing he could do to make everything better for everyone else. Alfred would no longer have to fight with him and get upset anymore. Delacroix wouldn't have to yell at anyone anymore. And then Francis wouldn't have to worry about him telling what he did to him.

Matthew had grabbed a small pistol out of the gun cabinet and went to the far field where his men did their training. He had made up his mind as he put the barrel into his mouth. Tears streamed down his cheeks as he cocked the gun and put his finger on the trigger guard.

"Mattie, stop!" Alfred yelled out. "What the fuck are you doing?!"

Matthew pulled the gun out of his mouth. "Alfred, what are you doing out here? Go back to bed. Everything will be better in the morning."

"Not if my brother isn't here, it won't be," Alfred said, knocking the gun out of Matthew's hand. He wrestled Matthew's arms to his sides and hugged him, holding him in place like that. "Why would you do this? I can't live without you, Mattie! You're all I have left! I can't let you do this!"

"I'm no good for anyone! We can't even have normal conversations anymore!" Matthew sobbed. "All I do is upset you and you storm off every time! What kind of a brother am I anyway? All I do is piss you off! I suck at being a brother, Alfred! I'm better off dead! We both know it!"

"That's not true, Mattie! If you kill yourself, I'll shoot myself right after you, I swear to fucking God," he said. "And then Arthur, Leon, and Irunya will hate us. And that's only naming three people, Matt. Delacroix would come and spit on our graves. Matthew, we have so much left that we need to do. And then when this stupid war is over, you can quit the fucking military, okay? But until then, please stay strong!"

Matthew turned to Alfred and started sobbing into his little brother's chest. "Why? Why can't I be strong like you? Why is it so hard?"

"I don't know, Mattie," Alfred softly said, rubbing Mathew's back comfortingly. "I just don't know."


	12. Chapter 12

Matthew was extremely quiet the next day, more quiet than he had been in his life. He still couldn't wrap his head around what had come over him in the middle of the night. During the day, as he thought over it, it all seemed unreasonable and stupid. Why would he want to kill himself over something so stupid? To him, it seemed like him being immature and throwing a fit. But nighttime was hard for him. He couldn't deny that. But why did it always hurt so bad?

"Mattie, please say something," Alfred finally said at lunchtime. "You haven't said a word all day, and the guys are all worried about you." He frowned. "No, fuck that. I'm worried about you. Please talk to me."

"What can I say?" Matthew gloomily asked. "If anyone finds out what I did, I'll be kicked out of the military for sure. And it won't be an honorable discharge…"

"I won't tell anyone, Mattie," Alfred said, "I promise. You can trust me. I'm your brother."

"It's not you that I'm worried about, Al," Matthew sighed. "I'm worried that someone else could find out if we even so much as speak of it." He frowned. "God, why am I so fucking stupid?" He put his head in his hands and tugged at his blond locks. His eyes were bloodshot as he looked up at Alfred. "I have a problem, Alfred. I have a serious problem."

"I'm glad you figured that out," Alfred said. "Because you wouldn't have believed me if I would have told you. You know that, right? You would have denied it. I know you would have."

Matthew shrugged. "I suppose you're right," he sighed. "I would have denied it because I don't like being told that I'm something I don't believe I am. I need to figure things out for myself." He put his head on the table. "I can't keep doing this, Alfred. I'm dying here. I need to get back to Russia."

"Maybe if you turned yourself in they would understand," Alfred said.

Matthew raised his head to glared at his brother. "Not happening. You don't know Delacroix like I do. He'll kill me himself, or at least make me wish I had succeeded. I'm not doing that. And don't you dare tell anyone either, Alfred. I could not be any more serious right now. If you do, I will disown you and never speak to you again. Do you hear me?"

Alfred gulped and nodded. "Loud and clear," he muttered.

Matthew nodded. "Glad we're on the same page here." He sighed as he looked down at his tray of rations. "I can't eat any of this," he said, pushing it toward Alfred. "Here, you take it."

"Are you sure?" Alfred asked. "You haven't been eating much lately. Are you sure you're okay? You are starting to look as sick as I know you feel."

"I'm fine," Matthew mumbled. "Stop worrying about me, Alfred. I don't know how many damned times I have to tell you that."

"Tell me until it's actually true," Alfred said, looking at Matthew's tray. The food looked delicious, but he couldn't let himself take it. He didn't feel right taking his brother's food, whether Matthew was going to eat it or not. "Then maybe I'll stop worrying."

"Al, we're not kids anymore," Matthew sighed. "Nothing is ever okay like it used to be. I thought you would understand that. We grew up, and when you grow up, everything fucking sucks!"

"How so?" Alfred asked. "Is it because we don't get our way anymore? Is it because things don't work out the way we always thought it would? Is it because not everyone treats us poor, orphan boys with the same sympathy they gave us as children?"

"That's not fair of you to say that," Matthew said, tearing up. "Stop that." He shook his head. "I never asked for sympathy from anyone."

"But I know you took advantage of it as much as I did," Alfred said. "We used the sympathy to turn in our homework late, or as an excuse to stay up late at night. Don't even deny it. We even used it to become part of the military."

"And look where that fucking got us!" Matthew nearly shouted at him. He quickly lowered his voice. "Now we're both miserable as fuck in France." His lip trembled a little. "I want to leave. I don't want to be here anymore. I can't take it here. It reminds me of my mom, and I can't keep listening to people speaking French."

"And there's the sympathy right there," Alfred said, gesturing to Matthew.

Matthew stood and grabbed Alfred by his collar. "If you ever say that again, I will not hesitate to beat the shit out of you," he snarled into his brother's ear. "Don't ever say I'm seeking sympathy when you don't understand the kind of person my mother was. It's not my fault you don't understand how important a mother is when you yourself never had one."

Alfred's chair hit the floor as he got to his feet, grabbing Matthew's collar. "I will fucking kill you myself if you say something like that again," he growled into his brother's ear. "You don't know what it's like because you're just a spoiled brat who was given a fucking choice to move to Des Moines and join the academy, whereas I was forced to join. Shut your fucking mouth if you don't know what the fuck you're talking about." He let go of Matthew, throwing him into a wall and storming off.

Matthew didn't regret his words as he tried to catch his breath after having the wind knocked out of him from hitting the wall. He didn't care that Alfred was mad at him because he was mad at Alfred for once. Why didn't Alfred understand his pain? They both lost their father, even if Matthew had technically always been closer to him. But Alfred lost his mother as well, even before Matthew did. And even as a child, Alfred seemed so unaffected by her death, whereas when Matthew's mother had died, Matthew shut everyone out and cried for weeks.

"Sir, are you okay?" a soldier in Matthew's troops asked, walking over.

"Yeah," Matthew sighed out. "I'm fine. He just has a really bad temper. He always has." He didn't notice how many people had seen him and Alfred until he saw all the eyes in the cafeteria on him. He gulped. This would definitely get to Delacroix within the hour, and he was going to get into trouble for "inability to control" one of his men.

"Do you need help getting up, Captain Williams?" the soldier asked, offering a hand to Matthew. He looked worried as he stared down at Matthew.

Matthew accepted the offer. "Thank you. I appreciate it." He got up and nodded to the soldier. "Private Jones and I have some personal issues with each other that need sorted out is all."

"Aren't you two brothers?" the soldier asked. "I mean, I know it's none of my business, but I heard a rumor that he's your little brother."

"He is," Matthew confirmed. "Can't you tell? We look alike." He sighed. "He just has a lot of issues that need sorted out right now. I just hope he can do so."

"I don't think he's the only one, sir," the soldier said, saluting Matthew. He then turned on his heel and walked off.

Matthew blinked in surprise. What did the soldier mean by that? Did he notice Matthew's strange behavior just as easily as Alfred had been? If that were the case, he would need to start being extra careful. He couldn't let anyone else know that he was feeling like that. If others caught on, he was dead.

.

Matthew didn't end up talking to Alfred anymore that day. He went to his bunk after dinner and went straight to bed. Though he didn't get to sleep until long after the other men went to bed. He only pretended to be asleep, like he usually did, ignoring their comments of, "Damn, he goes to bed early!"

He didn't want to hear the other captains talk about their girlfriends back home as they got ready for bed. He didn't want to hear them talk about the letters they were receiving from them while he wasn't allowed to receive any from his love. It put an aching feeling in his chest to hear one of the men complain about how little his girlfriend back home wrote to him. Even if it was little, at least it was something! Matthew had nothing!

By the time everyone had quieted down and fallen asleep, Matthew felt ice cold on the inside. He felt half-dead after hearing the men complain about their girlfriends. It made him ache and want for Irunya. He wanted her so badly that it pained him on the inside. He felt as if those men had ripped out his heart and used it for target practice before placing it back in his chest, barely beating.

A shadow appeared next to his bed and Matthew nearly shouted before a hand was clamped firmly over his mouth. "Mattie, it's just me," Alfred whispered. "I can't sleep when you're mad at me. Dad always said not to go to bed angry anyway."

Matthew removed his brother's hand from his mouth and scooted over in his bunk. "Fine," he whispered. "But only this once, got it? And it's only because you used sympathy on me."

Alfred grinned at him, causing Matthew to smile a little, their fight earlier seeming stupid to both brothers. "I'm sorry about what I said, Mattie," he whispered. "I didn't mean what I said about your mom. She was always really nice to me whenever I talked to her."

"She really liked you, Al," Matthew whispered back, yawning. "And what I said to you about yours was uncalled for."

"It may have been uncalled for, but it wasn't like it was a lie," Alfred softly sighed. He leaned his head on Matthew's shoulder and took off his glasses, carefully placing them on the nightstand. "My mom was a terrible person. There is no denying that. But luckily, I got a pretty swell brother to make up for it all."

Matthew smiled. "I think my brother is a pretty swell guy too, Al," he said softly. He slipped his own glasses off and set them next to Alfred's before relaxing in bed. "It's been awhile since we've done this, you know. But I think tonight is a good night to. I was feeling so lost and sad and I think I really need you to be here with me tonight. I don't want a repeat of last night."

"Neither do I," Alfred softly told him. "I think that's why I felt like I needed to come here. Do you remember when we were kids and I was scared of the dark? I would always sleep in your bed with you. The staff at the academy would get so mad and tell me to conquer my fear, yet every night you would just let me sleep with you like it was no big deal."

"Because it wasn't a big deal," Matthew answered. "My little brother was scared. What else was I supposed to do, let you cry in your bed all night? Then I wouldn't get any sleep." He smiled at Alfred. "All jokes aside, I let you sleep with me because you were my little brother and I didn't care. It was before I knew, and even now that I know about you, I still don't mind you sharing my bed."

"Well yeah," Alfred lightly scoffed. "We're brothers."

"But I swear to God, if you hog the blankets again tonight, we're going to have some problems in the morning," Matthew warned. "Just letting you know now."

Though he tried to seem threatening, he was relieved that Alfred was staying with him in his bunk that night. Maybe he would finally get the sleep he needed. And in the morning, he knew that Alfred would be enough motivation to get him out of bed on time and in the showers. Matthew closed his eyes and was asleep within minutes, Alfred softly snoring next to him.

.

The next morning, Matthew woke up at his alarm, but more so when Alfred was startled from it and jumped a little, elbowing Matthew in the jaw. Matthew rubbed his jaw and reached for his glasses before realizing they were right next to Alfred's. He was going to have to use trial and error to find them since they had the same ones.

Matthew slipped on a pair and almost got an instant headache. "Alfred, here are your glasses," he muttered, handing the pair to his brother, who lazily took them from him as he yawned. He then found his own pair and put them on, smiling. "Much better," he sighed.

"You're a brave soul, Mattie," Alfred said. "Your vision is worse than mine, yet you're the one who always tests out the glasses in the mornings after we do this. No wonder you're the captain out of the two of us."

"Shut up," Matthew yawned as he sat up and stretched. He blinked his eyes a few times, feeling more energized and awake than he usually did in the mornings. Maybe that was just his imagination, though. Or maybe it was because Alfred was there to motivate him. After all, he didn't lay there for an hour before sitting up, like he usually did.

"Mattie, why are you up so early anyway?" Alfred groggily asked, rubbing his eyes. He slipped on his glasses. "I don't even get up until an hour from now."

"It's a captain's job to get up before his men," Matthew quickly covered.

"You're full of shit," Alfred grumbled. "But once I'm up, I'm up. Let's head to the showers. We'll get some hot water because no one in their right mind would be awake at this ungodly hour."

"I never once claimed to be sane," Matthew stated, getting out of bed. He stretched once more and got out his suitcase to get some clean clothes. "Now come on, shower time, Alfred."

"You're like a mother, you know that?" Alfred complained.

Matthew froze. He had heard someone tell him that before. That was the first thing Irunya had ever casually teased him about. He smiled a little. "I've been told that before," he said proudly.

"Oh really?" Alfred quietly laughed. "By who?"

"That's one of the first things Irunya ever teased me about," Matthew said. "She told me I was like a mother because I was cleaning off the bar at the restaurant she worked at because there was a rush and she was too busy to." He thought back to that day. He could still see her perfectly in his mind's eye. And if he were to close his eyes, it would almost be as if he were still there with her. "She always liked to tease me about things."

"Sounds like she'll fit in great in our family," Alfred said, smiling as he got out of Matthew's bunk and made it. "She sounds like a keeper to me, Mattie."

"She is, Al," Matthew happily sighed. "Trust me. She really is."

.

Matthew noticed he was having a better day that day. It was one of the best ones he had had in a great while, he had to admit. He felt more active and more outgoing. His body felt like it had more energy stored up inside of it as well.

"We notice a change in you, Captain!" Levesque said, saluting him after afternoon training that day. "Welcome back, Captain Williams!"

Matthew smiled. "Here's hoping it lasts." He saluted the soldier back. "Merci, soldier." He began to pace in front of his troops. "Now, we're going to have to be on the lookout for any German troops. They're getting closer, advancing toward us. Do you know what that means? It means we will be having to engage in combat soon." His eyes watched as all of his men, including Alfred, stiffened up. "I know that none of you have probably fought a real enemy before, but I tell you, it's a rush. There will be adrenaline pumping through your veins and you may not be thinking straight, but trust me on one thing. Your body will know what to do." He picked up a rifle. "You will pick up a rifle. Your legs may be shaking because you're terrified as hell, but you'll pick up that goddamn rifle and before you know it, that enemy soldier will be dead before you."

Alfred cringed. "I wish war was more peaceful."

"Isn't that what everyone wishes?" Matthew asked. "Don't we all wish that all the world's conflicts could be solved with a game of hockey or baseball? But it can't. Some people won't stop until there is bloodshed. That's where we come in to stop them. If they want blood to be shed, then it will be theirs, and not the blood of the innocent."

"Yeah!" a chorus of male voice cheered.

Matthew nodded his approval. "Now, men, what is our job?"

Levesque raised his hand. "I believe it is my job to protect my family and my country by being part of this military. I am here to lay my life on the line so that they can sleep peacefully in their beds at night and know that they are safe."

"Good answer, Levesque," Matthew said, nodding to him. "Anyone else?"

Alfred took a step forward. "I believe it is my place to protect and help out my family and my country and the people I care about by being here, sir," he confidently answered. "I may not always agree with the orders I am given, but in the end I see that they are given to keep me and my loved ones safe. It may suck that many people are dying and there is nothing we can do about that, but if we all stick together we can make it out of this and keep everyone we care about safe."

Matthew smiled. "That's right, Jones," he said. "If you ever need that extra push to remind you why you are here or what you are really fighting for, think of that one person who will make going home worth it. It could be your mother, father, brother, sister, girlfriend, whoever. Think of how happy they are that you are out here to keep them safe."

"Captain Williams, I know this is none of my business, but I heard that your only family is Private Jones," a soldier chimed in. "If he's all you have and you're here together, then what do you have to remind you why you are here?"

Matthew smiled slyly. "What? You think I don't have a girl waiting for me somewhere?" he asked with a chuckle. "Oh, I have the most beautiful girl that any man has ever laid eyes on waiting for me. She's everything I could ever want and more. If I didn't have her, maybe I wouldn't have anything to motivate me except for my undying love for the country that adopted me."

"That's right," another soldier said, "you're not even from America, are you?"

"Not at all," Matthew stated. "True, I am from North America, but I am actually from Canada, not the United States."

"You have some undying loyalty to things, don't you?" Alfred laughed. "First her, and now to my country. What's next, the country of Russia?"

"You never know," Matthew laughed back. "After all, I have only Russia to thank for my eternal happiness."

Both brothers laughed as the rest of the men looked at them like they were insane, yet Matthew's words from that morning rang inside the heads of the two. I never once claimed to be sane.


	13. Chapter 13

Early March, 1943, Paris, France

"Captain Matthew Williams and Private Alfred F. Jones, please report to Colonel Delacroix's office immediately," a voice commanded over the loudspeaker.

Matthew's heart began to race in his chest. "What the fuck does he want?" he hissed to Alfred, whom he was sitting with in the canteen for lunch. His eyes widened as he looked to Alfred. "You don't think he knows about…" He made a finger gun and gestured toward his mouth with it.

"No way," Alfred said. "That was over six months ago. How the hell would he know about that?" Even as he said it, he was still nervous that Delacroix had found out. "He probably just wants to talk about the fights we used to get into and wants to know if we've gotten into any more recently. We're fine."

Matthew's heart rate slowed a bit. "You're right," he softly said. "You're right, Al. That's what it is. I'm just overreacting." He took a deep breath. "We're the only two people who know about that. No one else would ever know about my stupidity that night." His nerves still didn't believe that at all. Truth was, he was scared shitless. He didn't want to go to that office.

Alfred stood up. "Come on, Mattie. We need to go."

The captain's legs felt like lead. "I can't do that," he said. "My legs feel too heavy to get up, Alfred. I can't go."

Alfred sighed. "Get up, Matthew. If we don't go now, it will only get worse. You know that as well as I do." He put his arms under Matthew's and hauled his brother to his feet. "I'll be there for support. It's going to be okay."

Matthew sighed. "It won't be, Alfred. He knows. I know he does." He groaned as they began walking. "I'm scared shitless of that man, Al. I'm terrified! I don't want to go. Please don't make me go, Alfred. Be a good brother and don't make me! Please!"

Alfred smacked Matthew on the back of the head. "Grow the fuck up, Mattie," he scolded. "Seriously, he's just a person." He shook his head condescendingly. "I swear, you act like a child whenever he is mentioned. I think you need to grow up and face him."

"You don't understand, Alfred. He's a terrifying man," Matthew insisted. "You've never had to deal with him like I have." He stopped as they reached the office and gave Alfred a pleading look. "Please don't make me do this."

The younger of the two opened the door and ushered his brother inside, closing the door after them. "Private Jones and Captain Williams reporting to Colonel Delacroix!" he announced as he and Matthew stood at attention.

Delacroix glared at each of them. "Stand down," he growled. He focused his gaze on Matthew. "How long did you two expect to keep your dirty, little secret?"

"What secret, sir?" Matthew asked, trying to keep his back straight. He struggled to keep his legs from shaking or giving way.

"I know what you did, Captain Williams," he snarled. "You are a disgrace to this military!" He walked over to Matthew and stood toe-to-toe with him. "Maybe you should have followed through with it and done everyone a favor!"

Alfred felt his anger rising inside of him. "Don't you dare talk to my brother like that!" he shouted. "You don't know what he's been through!" He clenched his fists and took a step toward Delacroix.

Matthew raised a hand at Alfred, never once looking away from Delacroix's furious gaze. "It's all right, Alfred. I can handle this." He met Delacroix's gaze evenly. "Demote me, sir. Do it. Demote me. Send me back to the fucking Russian border for all I care."

Delacroix's furious glare hardened. "I'll let you freeze to death at the Russian border," he snarled. "And until then, the two of you are going back to England, do you hear me, Private Williams?"

"Loud and clear, sir," Matthew said. "My brother and I will pack our things. May we be dismissed?"

"Get the fuck out of my sight," Delacroix snarled. "But before you leave," he began. He reached over and ripped the Captain's badge from Matthew's uniform. "I'll be taking this."

"It's yours," Matthew said before turning and walking out with Alfred.

Once they were down the hall, Alfred couldn't contain his joy anymore. "Mattie, you knew what you were doing all along, weren't you?" he asked, struggling to keep his voice quiet. "Now you'll be with Irunya again, and I'll get to see Arthur!"

Matthew smirked to Alfred. "Once people lose their tempers, they are easy to manipulate, Alfred," he simply said before going on ahead to his quarters to pack.

.

The first place they went when they got to England was Arthur's house. Poor Arthur had no idea what to say or do other than just kiss Alfred as Leon walked into the room. Matthew had to quickly usher Leon from the room.

"I knew Daddy was in love with Alfred!" Leon excitedly told Matthew once they were in the living room. "They have always been very close and I think I have seen them kiss another time before as well! I'm so happy, Captain Williams! Does this mean I have two parents now?"

"It could mean that," Matthew said with a shrug. "And please don't call me Captain Williams anymore. I'm not a captain anymore." He frowned. "I'm Private Williams now, if anything." It bothered Matthew that he was stripped of his status, but he was more than happy to be transferred back to Russia. He was going to be with Irunya soon! "But just call me Matthew, Leon. I would like you to call me Matthew."

"I guess I could do that," Leon said, smiling. "It's just that Daddy always taught me not to address people by their first names if they were adults."

"Well you have no problem with addressing my brother by his name," Matthew reminded. "What's up with that, Leon?"

Leon giggled. "Alfred insisted upon it."

"Well then I upon you calling me Matthew," he said, smiling widely. "So now you have to, Leon."

Leon giggled. "If you insist, Matthew."

Matthew smiled. "So how do you feel about having someone like my brother for a second parent, Leon? Are you okay with that? I mean, he can be a little silly sometimes, but he's a great person. I love him dearly."

"I think he's perfect," Leon said, smiling fondly to himself. "I was always hoping that he could be my other parent, if I'm honest. I always hoped that he and my daddy could fall in love." He looked up at Matthew. "Even though I know it's forbidden, does that make me a bad person? I know it's wrong for two men to love each other in that way, but I wanted my daddy and Alfred to fall in love. Am I a bad child?"

"You're not a bad child at all," Matthew said, smiling. "What you want is what you want, Leon. There is nothing wrong with it at all. It's completely fine. Alfred and your father are happy together from what I can tell. You're not wrong for wanting it, because I wanted it, too. I wanted Alfred to find someone who makes him happy, and that's what your father does."

Leon smiled. "I'm glad. I hope they can be happy together forever."

Matthew smiled and ruffled the boy's hair. "Me too, kiddo."

.

Two Weeks Later, Ukrainian Border

Matthew stepped out of the military base. Since he was no longer a captain, he didn't have any responsibilities to take care of before going to the restaurant where Irunya worked. He had to refrain from running there, but he managed to get there rather quickly.

As he opened the doorway, he saw Natalia, who was pouring coffee at a table. She turned around, saw Matthew, and dropped the coffee pot, shattering it on the floor. Her blue eyes were wide but then narrowed as she glared at him.

The man she had been pouring coffee for was no other than Toris, the Jewish man Matthew had rescued a year ago. He stood and walked over to Matthew. "It has been awhile, Captain Williams," he nervously said, cautious of Natalia's behavior as she went to clean up the coffee pot mess. "Look, I think we should go for a bit and catch up. I don't think we should be here, rather you than me."

"Where's Irunya?" Matthew asked him, confused.

"She doesn't work here anymore," Toris softly said. He ushered him out of the restaurant. "Now come with me, we have to go or Natalia will become more angry."

"I don't understand," Matthew said. "Is she mad at me?" What was going on? And where was Irunya? Matthew's brain couldn't comprehend what was going on.

"She's beyond mad, Matthew," Toris said, looking away. "She believes that you ruined Irunya's life."

"Ruined her life?" Matthew softly asked. "How did I do that?" He began to panic. "I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I ruined her life. I can't do it. How did I ruin her life, Toris? I need to know. I can't stand it if I ruined her life. She deserves and amazing life."

Toris bit his lip. "I can't tell you too much," he said. "But she's not the same woman you met a year ago. She's very different and won't let anyone help her. She was disowned by her family six months ago and now lives in a shack on my property."

"You own land here?" Matthew asked him, raising his eyebrows with interest.

Toris smiled. "Of course. My wife and I would have to live somewhere, right?" He smiled and showed Matthew the gold ring on his right hand. "Natalia and I got married five months ago. She is the most wonderful woman I've ever come across in my life. I've never loved another woman the way I love her."

Matthew smiled. "I'm glad you found someone like her, Toris." He thought for a moment. "Where's Raivis? How's he doing?"

"I got a letter from him recently," Toris answered. "He left back in November. He ended up in Switzerland, of all places." He smiled. "But I'm glad that he's happy. He met a girl named Lilli that he is in love with. I'm glad that he has someone. He's the age I was when I fell in love for the first time."

Matthew smiled. "I'm glad that he is well, too." He sighed. "I know this is a long shot, but could you please take me to Irunya?"

Toris thought for a moment. "It may be only a quick visit. I mean, it's not like she has a job, but if Natalia finds out, she'll be furious with me…"

"Why doesn't she have a job?" Matthew asked.

"No place would hire someone like her," Toris answered solemnly. "So we help support her as best as we can. It just gets hard sometimes. Especially in winter. In all honesty, we were hoping that you would return soon."

"Why is that?" Matthew asked.

"We've needed you badly," Toris answered. "She's starting to lose hope. The war just won't end fast enough. She needs you. Also, maybe you can help support her. That may help calm Natalia's nerves and make her less furious with you."

"I honestly don't care what Natalia thinks of me," Matthew answered. "I just want to see my Irunya." He sighed. "She's all I can think about, all I dream of."

"She may not be the same Irunya you remember," Toris warned, "but I'll take you to her."

.

Matthew stood outside of a small shack. Toris decided to wait inside of his house, thinking that their reunion was probably best to be kept personal, yet he didn't say anything other than that. As confused as he was, Matthew stood at the door and knocked. He heard harsh coughing on the other side of the door. It almost sounded like a barking cough. He was certain that it was Irunya, which made him worry.

The woman who opened the door had long, silvery-blonde hair that hung in a braid which was tied into a bun. Her blue eyes looked tired, no longer playful and adventurous. Her whole appearance just looked tired to him. Her stomach looked as if she had gained a little bit of weight, but the rest of her body looked just how he had remembered, except her breasts, which looked slightly larger.

"Matvey?" she softly asked in disbelief. Her hand reached out to touch his face. She needed to make sure it was him.

"It's me, Irunya," he confirmed, bringing a hand up to touch hers. "I'm really here. And I'm not going anywhere. I'm here, and I still love you just as much as I did before."

Her eyes began to water. "Tell me I'm dreaming," she softly said. "This can't be real. This must be a dream, I've been waiting for this day for so long, and it's finally here." Tears spilled down her cheeks. "You're actually here!" She lowered her voice. "Please come in, Matvey."

"Irunya, you don't look well," Matthew softly said, following her in and shutting the door. "Are you doing okay?"

"Well, I've had to sacrifice a lot in the past year, but it's all worth it," Irunya sighed, smiling.

"Why did you have to sacrifice?" Matthew asked, confused. "What were you sacrificing for? Let me help you while I'm here."

Irunya blushed. "Why don't I just show you instead of tell you?" she suggested. She opened the door to the bedroom. "Stay here and have a seat, Matvey. I will return in a moment."

Matthew sat on her small couch and drummed his fingers on his knees. She seemed so different to him, yet at the same time she was still the same Irunya that he had fallen in love with a year ago. He couldn't figure it out, but he was so happy to finally see her again.

She emerged from the room with a small bundle of blankets and Matthew's jaw dropped. "Matvey, I want you to meet someone," she said, smiling. "This is Vladyslav Matthew Williams, your son. He's three months old, born on December 29th."

He had no words to say as she came and sat next to him. As he looked at the baby's hair and noticed the shade of blond that matched his, he couldn't deny his own son. "You mean…."

"Yes," Irunya said with a nod. "Vlad is your son, Matvey." She smiled. "Would you like to hold him?"

Matthew's eyes filled with tears as he took the small bundle from Irunya. "He looks just like me," he said, voice choked. "He's so beautiful, Irunya." He looked over at Irunya, overwhelmed, as tears spilled down his cheeks. "If only I had known. If I had known, I would have come right back here. I would have done everything in my power to get my ass back here sooner." His eyes went back to his son as his vision blurred with tears once more. "Oh, my God…"

Irunya smiled and kissed Matthew's cheek. "He even has your eyes, Matthew," she said, giggling. "He looks nothing like me. But didn't you say that was a family trait for your family, for the boys to look alike or something like that?"

Matthew nodded. "I always thought it was some weird legend or something, but I guess it's not." He smiled down at Vladyslav. "You are the most beautiful and perfect son I could ever ask for," he softly told him. "And I'm so glad that you're my boy. I promise that I won't miss any more of your life. Because now I know what the most important things in my life are, you and your mother." He kissed the baby's forehead. "You are beautiful, Vladyslav."

Irunya smiled. "I love you, Matvey. You are the greatest man in all of existence." She smiled. "Please kiss me."

Matthew smiled and used one arm to wipe his tears away. "You don't have to tell me twice." He leaned in and kissed Irunya, his first kiss in over a year. It was perfect and everything he remembered it being. It was as if he were falling in love with her all over again, but now they had a child together, and a beautiful new beginning. He couldn't wait to tell Alfred all about it.


	14. Chapter 14

Late April, 1943, Ukrainian Border

Matthew smiled at his love as he bounced their son on his knee. "Irunya, I still see you in Vlad," he said, looking at their son. "His smile is more yours than mine." He then looked up at Irunya. "God, we have a beautiful child. You are absolutely marvelous."

Irunya blushed. "I couldn't have done it without you, Matvey. Remember that." She patted her stomach and sighed. "It wasn't easy, but now we have the most beautiful boy in the whole world." Her eyes lit up as she saw Matthew play with Vlad. "He's my pride and joy, the best thing in my life. I love him dearly because he is your child."

"And now I'm here with you," Matthew said, smiling. "It was supposed to be a punishment, but how could it possibly be a punishment when this is where I want to be more than anything?"

"That's where I'm confused," Irunya softly said. "What did you do to be punished?" She frowned and reached out to Matthew to take their son. Once Vlad was in her hands, she snuggled him close and frowned. "Now tell me, what did you do to be transferred back here as a 'punishment', Matvey? It must have been pretty bad to be punished…" Her pretty, pink lips turned into a frown. "What did you do?" she softly asked.

Matthew took a deep breath. "I know you would eventually ask this question, but I was hoping it wouldn't come so soon…" He sighed out softly. "This won't be easy for me to say, or for you to hear. But I did something very bad in the eyes of anyone…"

Irunya closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I can handle it," she softly said. "I can take it, I promise, Matvey. Just what did you do?"

"I, uh…" His voice trailed off for a moment. "I tried to kill myself, Irunya."

She shook her head in disbelief. "Matvey, why would you do such a thing?" she softly asked. "I can't believe someone as wonderful as you would ever want to end their life." She moved and went to sit next to him, leaning her head on his shoulder. "Why would you ever want to kill yourself, Matvey? Why?" Her voice had cracked near the end, causing Matthew's heart to shatter a little.

Matthew sighed. "It was because I was starting to lose hope," he softly said. "I thought I was never going to see you again. I thought I was never going to get out of this stupid war." He looked away. "The men in France were putting in my head that you didn't really love me, and that it wasn't for real. Yet you were always on my mind. But I was so conflicted with everything going on in my head. I was so confused. I couldn't understand myself." He bit his lip and sighed. "Irunya, I love you so much. I just couldn't focus on anything but you."

"That's not a good reason to try to kill yourself, Matvey," Irunya softly said, kissing his cheek. "I will always love you. You gave me Vladyslav. Matvey, you gave me a reason to live. I love you so much. Never leave your life on this earth, because what would I ever do without you?" Her eyes sparkled with tears of betrayal as she rocked their now-sleeping son. "You are everything to me. Never do something like that again. Do you hear me? Never!"

Matthew slipped an arm around her waist and pulled her closer, kissing her temple. "I promise," he said. "I won't ever do it again because now I know what's most important to me in the entire world. I have both you and Vlad now. There is nothing more important to me than my little family."

Irunya smiled. "There never should be anything more important than that," she softly said. She kissed his lips softly. "I love you so much, Matvey. "You're the best thing to ever happen to me. I mean that." Her smile was radiant, nearly blinding Matthew. "I will always love you, the father of my son."

Matthew smiled widely. "And I will always love the mother of my son," he said before kissing her softly. He smiled as he pulled away. "I love you, Irunya Chernenko. You are amazing and the most important woman in my life. You have given me all I could ever want in life."

"You're so good to me, Matvey," she softly said. "I cannot wait to be married to my wonderful American soldier." She kissed his cheek and leaned her head on his shoulder, sighing out happily. "Everything is so wonderful for us. Everything has gone so well that I could not imagine how our life could get any better."

"I can," Matthew said, smiling. He turned to Irunya and smiled. "I may not have a ring right now, my love, but I figured I'd ask once more and then again when I have a ring, just to make sure. Irunya Chernenko, would you marry me once this whole stupid war is over?"

Irunya smiled brightly at him, her soft, pink lips curving into a grin of pure delight. "Of course I will, Matvey, but only if you'll have me." She smiled and met his lips with hers once more. "You are everything I could ever want and then more. I love you, Matthew Williams, forever."

.

Matthew smiled as he stuck his letter in the mail with the military mail. It made him happy that he could at least write to Alfred, considering that they were both military personnel. He was going to send so many letters to his brother, detailing his life with Irunya and Vlad. In his letters, he made sure to include pictures of his happy family and letters telling about them. It was the least he could do to keep his brother in the loop. After all, it was thanks to Alfred that he was still there to enjoy them. And he thanked God for his brother every day.

As Matthew thought back to it, he couldn't help but wonder what would have happened to Irunya if he would have killed himself. He didn't want to think about it at all. It was too sickening to think about. What would have happened to his precious Irunya and their beautiful son? His thoughts always went to dark places when he thought of that, so he didn't bother thinking too far into that. Instead, he focused on how happy he was with his family.

He walked down the office corridor of the base only to hear a bit of a conversation that he probably wasn't supposed to hear.

"You know that Williams guy used to be a captain, right?" a soldier asked another one. "But I heard he tried to kill himself and one of his men, so they transferred him here."

"He tried to kill one of his men?!" another soldier asked. "Why the hell did they send him here?!" He sounded scared, but with a story like that, Matthew couldn't exactly blame him. "Doesn't the military realize a guy like that shouldn't belong in the military?!"

"I heard they were going to send him back to America and discharge him from the military, but he requested to come here," the first soldier said. "What the fuck is here that he would want?!"

"I don't know, but he's a freak!" the second soldier said.

Matthew smiled to himself and continued down the hall. He didn't care that the men were gossiping about him at all. After all, now that he had Irunya back and could see her daily once more, why should he care about trivial things of that sort? As long as he was happy and had the woman of his dreams by his side, nothing else in the whole damn world mattered.

.

Vlad smiled when he saw Matthew walk in the door. He reached for him when he sat down, wanting to be in his father's arms. "Dadadadada!" he sang happily.

"You know, he used to be his mother's little boy," Irunya mused, smiling as she looked from Vlad to Matthew, "but now he's turning out to like you more. Who would've guessed." She patted their young son on the head. "He rolled over today after his nap and can get into crawling position. Toris says he'll be crawling before we know it."

Matthew smiled. "That's our boy for you," he proudly stated. "He's very smart and very developed for his age." He kissed Vlad's forehead. "I wish I knew what age I was doing all of that at. I mean, he's even got my name down."

Irunya laughed. "All babies do that, though, Matvey," she said, smiling. "You never know what he really thinks your name is. For all we know, he could think it's what I call you behind your back."

"Oh really?" Matthew teasingly asked. "And what do you call me behind my back?"

Irunya giggled and whispered dirty things into Matthew's ears that made his face turn darker shades of red than the maple leaf on the Canadian flag. She laughed out loud when she saw his face. "Oh, Matvey! Your face is so red right now! I love it!"

"Do you really call me that?" he asked in shock. "Not that I would mind, since it's true. But still…"

"Maybe," she said, leaning in. "But it's been so long since I've experienced what I've nicknamed you for that I've forgotten why I've nicknamed you that," she teased, lips dangerously close to his ear.

Matthew's face felt even hotter than before. "Then why don't I let you experience it once the baby is back to bed?" he suggested. "I'm sure you'll be reminded just why you call me that. And if you want, you can think of other things to call me as well."

Irunya's face turned a dark shade of red as well. "What are you suggesting?" she asked.

"After being deprived of sex for so long, I've thought more and more about things I could do to you," Matthew eagerly stated. "And I've been dying to sleep with you again. After all, I've taken a month to get to know my son. It's time I familiarized myself with his mother once again," he teased.

"Oh, you're bad, Matvey," she said, giggling like a schoolgirl. "But there is no way I could object to something like that. I've been waiting for you to suggest it for awhile now. I've been dying to make love to you again."

"I've been dreaming of it for a little over a year," Matthew admitted. "So this will be perfect. Let's do it after we lay the baby down for a nap?"

Irunya smiled. "How about you hand him over, Matvey?" she suggested. "I can have him out within minutes."

Matthew kissed his son's forehead and whispered to him. "Do Daddy a favor and go to sleep for Mommy, okay, Vlad? I love you, and I'll see you when you wake up." He then handed the small infant over. "He's all yours, dearest."

Irunya smiled. "Did you really just ask him to go to sleep?" she laughed softly. She kissed Matthew's cheek. "You're eager and you want it badly, don't you?"

Matthew sheepishly shrugged. "What can I say? From a woman like you, who wouldn't want love?" He kissed her cheek. "I would have to say I'm the luckiest man in the world." He smiled as he watched her rock their son with expert skill. "Do you sing to him as well?"

"Sometimes," she softly answered. "A lot of the time, it's humming that does the trick. He loves it. And it's so easy to do because I don't have to worry about getting any words wrong." Irunya winked at him. "So much easier than singing."

"Well you do have a point there," Matthew said as he listened to her hum a lullaby. He liked whatever song it was, though it didn't sound familiar to him. "Your humming sounds beautiful, Irunya," he complimented, smiling. "I like it a lot."

"Thank you, Matvey," she softly said. "Perhaps I should hum to you after we make love?" she teased.

"Only if you want to," he teased back, winking.

Irunya's cheeks flushed and she looked away. "Matvey," she sighed out, "you're embarrassing me."

"You're the one who suggested it," he reminded. He watched as the baby's eyes fluttered closed. "So you only have to keep up the humming for a little longer, correct?" he asked.

Irunya nodded as she continued humming, pressing a kiss to their son's forehead and cheeks. "Patience, Matvey," she softly said, not wanting to disturb the baby. "All in due time."

"I just feel as if our time is overdue," Matthew softly said.

Irunya softly giggled. "Oh, Matvey," she sighed before standing up and going into the bedroom. "Come along then. I'm going to put Vlad in his cradle. Come with me." She beckoned him in with her large, blue eyes.

Matthew didn't have to be told twice as he followed her in eagerly. He began to undo the buttons on his shirt. "Irunya, I've been waiting for this moment for so long," he told her.

She turned to him. "Before we remove our clothing, I must warn you of one thing," she softly said, holding her stomach in her arms. "My body doesn't look the same as it once did. After all, I did have a baby. It won't look the same as you remember it."

"Would you really think I would care about something like that?" Matthew asked. "I love you, Irunya," he softly said. "It would be terrible of me to love you only for your body. What kind of a man would I be? I love you for who you are, Irunya. If I was so obsessed with your body, I would've wanted to be in bed with you long before now."

"I suppose that is true," she softly said before unbuttoning her shirt. She opened it, exposing her stomach, which was a little bigger after holding a baby inside of it. "So you don't mind this?"

Matthew walked over and placed a hand there. "Of course not," he said, smiling. "You carried my son inside of you. How could I possibly mind?"

Irunya smiled up at him. "I love you, Matvey." She kissed him softly. "You are wonderful." She discarded the shirt and her brassiere, her breasts much larger than Matthew remembered. "The worst part of having a baby is that my breasts have gotten even larger than before due to the breast milk inside of them for Vlad."

Matthew nodded. "I understand," he said discarding his shirt to the floor before working with his belt. "You're still just as lovely as I remembered."

She blushed a deep crimson. "Oh, stop it," she giggled, undoing her skirt and letting it drop to the floor before taking off her stockings. "You forget how flawed my body is as well."

"I don't remember you having such low self-confidence," Matthew stated as he dropped his pants to the floor.

"That's because I was too overcome with lust to remember myself," Irunya admitted, blushing. "And also when everyone is calling you a whore, it kind of gets to you after awhile…"

"I don't think you're one," Matthew stated, lowering his boxers as well before taking off his socks, rendering him completely nude.

"Well, of course you wouldn't," Irunya said, removing her panties. "Vlad is your child. But to all of the other men, I was suddenly an ugly whore." She looked down. "It got to me after awhile because it made me think that you would think of me as ugly as well when you got back. And that maybe you wouldn't want Vlad."

"Of course I want him," Matthew said, holding her close. He kissed her softly. "I love him so much. Just like I love you." He kissed down her neck and ran his hands down her sides, feeling her shudder. "You're the most amazing woman in my life."

Irunya pressed herself closer to him and reached between his legs,stroking him gently like he had taught her over a year before. She grinned as he shuddered like he had made her. "I love you, Matthew Williams," she said, grinning before kissing him. "Make sweet, sweet love to me. Never let me go. Never leave me again, my love. I will never let you leave me again."

Matthew struggled to say, "Yes. I will never leave you again. I will make love to you. I will never let you go. You're mine forever and I will be yours for as long as you'll have me." He tipped her onto the bed.

Irunya giggled beneath him. "You are everything to me, Matvey. God's precious gift to me."

"Is that really what Matvey means?" Matthew asked. "Toris told me that's what it meant awhile back."

"Looks like he gave it away, didn't he?" she said with a soft smile. She grinned at him and kissed him once more. "Now make love to me."

"Call me my names," Matthew softly encouraged.

Irunya turned a deep scarlet. "No way!"

Matthew shushed her. "Vlad is sleeping," he quietly reminded. "I thought you, of all people, would remember that. Now be a good girl and call me by my name you have given me."

"Then make me yours, Almighty Sex Beast," she softly encouraged.

"I know there are some better than that," Matthew complained.

Irunya winked and giggled. "But those are for later."


	15. Chapter 15

May, 1945, Ukrainian Border

Matthew looked up into the sky as he stood at his post to defend from the enemy troops. That day, there weren't any as far as he could tell. On a good day, he fired his gun maybe about five times. On a bad day, he was firing it at least twice every hour. So far that day, he hadn't fired it once, and his eight hour shift was almost finished. What was going on?

"Williams!" he heard a man calling from behind him. "Williams, put your gun down! I have news!"

The Canadian-American man put his gun down and looked over at the man who was almost gleefully running toward him. "What is it?" he asked. "You look like you're out of breath. Did you run all the way here?"

"That's beside the point," the soldier panted, taking a deep drink from his canteen. Once he was thoroughly replenished, he smiled widely. "The war, it's over! We can all go home! You too, Williams! We're all going home!"

Matthew blinked his eyes in surprise. "We're what?" he asked, rising to his feet. "We're going home?" He could barely believe his ears. He could finally go home! No more cold Russian winters! No more of any of this! He couldn't wait to tell Irunya!

That meant another thing to him! He was finally going to be able to quit the military! He was going to finally be able to settle down with Irunya and live a happy family life with her! His heart pounded with anticipation! He wanted to run straight to Irunya and tell her!

"That's right! We leave in two days!" the other soldier excitedly said. "Aren't you excited? We finally get to see our families again! For me, it's been too long! I've been here for a year, and I feel like I'm going crazy! How long has it been since you've seen your brother, Williams?"

"Two years," Matthew answered absently. But he wasn't thinking of Alfred at that moment. He was thinking of Irunya and their children. She had just given birth to their second child together. Would she be okay to travel, or would he have to come back for her after buying their house? He would need to discuss such matters with her before thinking any further into this all.

.

Matthew found himself in Irunya's home before he knew it. Though it had taken an hour to get there, he hadn't really noticed. He was so happy, he felt as if it had only taken minutes! He could hardly contain his joy as he kissed her happily and passionately the moment she opened the door to him.

"Matvey, what is it?" she asked him, blinking in a pleasant confusion. She wasn't used to being kissed like that at the front door, but she loved it when she was. Her hands held his tightly. "But please keep your voice down. I just got the kids to bed."

Matthew walked in and smiled at his beautiful Irunya. "The war," he excitedly whispered, "it's over! We can go to America now! Me, you, Vlad, and Olivia can all go to America!"

Irunya's eyes widened. "You're not just joking around, are you?" she asked.

"Darling, normally I wouldn't even be done with my shift by now, would I?" Matthew asked her. "Check the time."

She turned her eyes to the clock and they slowly widened. "Matvey, it is true!" Her arms wrapped him in a tight embrace as tears of joy spilled down her cheeks. "We're free to leave! We can go to America!" She kissed his lips over and over in excitement and joy. "Matvey, we can leave!"

He picked her up and spun her around. "We are free to leave," he confirmed, smiling. "But I have to go with the troops first. Here's a suggestion. Would you like to wait here a month for me to return, or would you like to go alone with the kids?"

She was quiet for a moment as she thought. "I am in no condition to travel alone with both of them," she softly said. "And here I know Natalia will help me watch them. But you must promise to return for us the first chance you get. I will not accept another year alone!"

"I would never make you wait another year," Matthew told her. "The longest it would be is two months so I could get us an apartment in Des Moines."

Irunya nodded. "I can wait that long," she slowly said. "If it is what's best for our family. But no longer than two months. I will not wait longer than that, Matvey, unless if you write me and give me a damn good reason as to why."

He nodded. "I understand you perfectly," he told her. "I won't make you wait longer than what's necessary." Matthew's lips pressed against her cheek. "Irunya Chernenko, I love you, and I would never want to be with anyone else for the rest of my life. You are the only one for me, and I want to cherish you for the rest of my life."

"Until the day we die, Matvey," she agreed, smiling. She kissed him gently. "Vlad has been waiting all day for you, by the way. He's so excited to see you that all he could do was make up songs about seeing you today."

Matthew smiled. "That sounds like him," he said. "He really does like to sing, doesn't he, Irunya? That must be a trait from my father's side, because Alfred really liked to sing a lot when we were younger. I was always quiet like my mother."

"You, quiet?" Irunya laughed. "I don't believe that for a single moment."

"That's because when I met you was when I finally found my voice and my confidence in myself," Matthew stated. "It was like I became an entirely different person. I suddenly felt like I could be confident in myself, and it was all thanks to you."

Irunya blushed. "I'm sure it wasn't all me," she softly said. She sighed when there was a faint cry from the bedroom. "Olivia, I just got you to sleep," she groaned.

Matthew gestured to himself. "I've got this," he said. "Let Papa handle his little girl." He took his shoes off and went into the bedroom to pick up his sobbing daughter. She was about a month old and looked just like her mother, which Matthew absolutely loved since her brother looked like him. "Livvy, what is wrong, little girl?" he cooed at her, picking her up.

The wailing infant snuggled into her father's embrace, her sobbing coming to an end as she became captivated by his cooing at her. She looked up at him with her blue eyes that matched her mother's, and Matthew felt as if it were a tiny Irunya looking up at him.

He smiled down at her. "Who's got you, Livvy?" he softly cooed down at his daughter. "That's right, Olivia. Papa's got his angel. There's no need to cry when Papa's here. Papa's gonna keep his little girl safe and happy. And that's a promise, my little princess."

Irunya smiled in the doorway, leaning against the doorframe with her arms crossed, a smile playing on her lips. "Little girls always tend to make fools of their fathers," she softly said. She walked into the room and peeked over Matthew's shoulder, smiling down at Olivia. "Papa's wrapped around your little finger, isn't he, Olivia?" she sighed. "He used to be wrapped around mine."

"What's with this 'used to be' nonsense?" Matthew asked, glancing over at her. "How else do you think you go these two kids in the first place? Not my fault Olivia happened to be a girl." He smiled back down at their daughter. "Not my fault at all, now is it?" he cooed at her.

"She really does make a fool of you," Irunya sighed. She kissed his cheek. "But a lovable fool at that." Her arms circled his waist from behind as she rested her head on his shoulder blades. "Our fool, right, Olivia?"

Matthew smiled. "I would be your fool any day of the week," he said. "As long as I can be your fool forever."

Irunya giggled. "Then stay our fool forever, Matvey. We wouldn't mind that at all." She squeezed him closer to her and smiled. "We love you so much, all three of us. We love our Papa."

He smiled. "But where would they be without Mama?" he asked. "You're the one who is with them all day every day." He turned in her grasped and kissed her forehead. "But soon we'll all live together, and we'll be happy forever. It's all I've ever dreamed of and more."

Irunya smiled. "I believe that to be the same for me as well."

Matthew then went to kiss her, making sure not to squish their daughter between them. He kissed the mother of his two children softly at first, but then more passionately once he noticed Olivia was asleep. "I love you, Irunya," he softly said. "And I'll love you forever."

"Until the day I die," she confirmed, closing her eyes and leaning her head on his shoulder. "Forever, Matvey. Forever."

.

Matthew always hated saying goodbye every night. He didn't like how Vlad would cry when he tucked him in, knowing he wouldn't see him first thing when he woke up. It broke his heart that Vlad knew those kinds of things.

"I promise that things will be different soon," he softly told his son that night. "You will see me every morning and every day and every night very soon, Vlad." Matthew kissed the sniffling toddler's forehead. "Just be very patient, buddy. But soon, we'll all be together forever. Nothing will ever keep us apart, Vladyslav."

"Promise?" Vlad softly asked, looking up at his father with the deep blue eyes that matched his perfectly.

Matthew smiled down at his young son. "I promise, big guy," he said. "But before that happens, I have to go for a little while. So I need you to be good for Mama and be a good big brother for Olivia. Can you do that for me?"

"Where are you going?" Vlad asked, rubbing his eyes tiredly.

"I have to go and get out new house ready," Matthew said. "It will be a nice house that you will like. But I have to go and make sure it's ready for me, you, Mama, and Livvy. So I need you to be good while I'm doing that."

"I'll be good," the little boy yawned. He smiled as he eyes fluttered closed.

"I know you will be," Matthew said. "I love you, Vladyslav."

"I love you, Papa," Vlad yawned back before drifting off to sleep.

Matthew sat there for a moment, feeling like the luckiest man in the world. He leaned forward and kissed his son's forehead again. "I know you'll do just fine, Vlad," he whispered, smiling. "I'm not one bit worried about you." He got up and joined Irunya out in the common room of the shack.

"Is he sleeping?" she asked softly, rocking Olivia as she nursed her.

Matthew smiled. "Of course," he said. He put an arm around Irunya. "We have such beautiful children, don't we?"

She eyed him suspiciously. "What are you hinting at, Matvey?" Noticing that Olivia had fallen asleep, she removed the infant from her breast and put her shirt down. Itunya put the infant over her shoulder and began to pat her back. "Are you wanting more than two?"

"I'm only wanting as many as you're willing to give me," Matthew said, kissing her cheek. "You are the one who decides these things, after all. I mean, you are the one who carries them."

"True," she mused. "But isn't it a woman's purpose in life to bear children for her husband?" Irunya looked at Matthew. "That is what my mother told me when I became of age to bear children. But now that I have given birth to two, I'm not sure how many more I can handle bearing." She sighed. "Although they are worth all of the pain, it does so many things to a woman's body." Irunya looked at Olivia. "I will never tell Olivia what my mother told me. Her body is hers to do what she wishes with."

Matthew smiled. "I am glad that you are so wise, Irunya. You are an amazing woman. I truly mean it." He smiled and put a rag on his girlfriend's shoulder just before the baby spit up all over it. "Caught it just in time," he said, smiling. "I am a great father."

Irunya smiled at him. "I always thought you were a wonderful father, Matvey." She brought her daughter down and snuggled her until the baby fell fast asleep. "You've always just been a wonderful person since the day we met. And now that the war is over, I can't wait until we can spend the rest of our lives together as husband and wife."

"Neither can I," Matthew agreed. He smiled and took his small daughter from Irunya, looking at the tiny human that the two of them had produced together. "It's so strange to think that we made this," he softly said. "Irunya, we made another human. We made this beautiful little girl and our handsome son. We made them, and they're the most perfect children I could ever ask for."

She smiled. "That's right, Matvey," she softly agreed, snuggled close to him. "We did make them. And remember that making them was a team effort, so I require that raising them will be a team effort as well."

"If you think I'm going anywhere after we move to America, you're crazy," Matthew said, smiling over at her. He gazed down at the infant in his arms and suddenly felt overwhelmed with joy and pride. "We made this," he whispered, so quietly that Irunya barely heard him. "Olivia is the most beautiful baby girl I have ever seen, and I helped create her."

"She wouldn't have come to be without you," Irunya agreed, smiling. She looped her arm through Matthew's and hugged it tightly to her. "I'm so glad that you're all mine, Matvey. It means the world to me that you're here with me and our children. We all love you so much."

"I love you all too," Matthew said, turning his focus to Irunya. "And I would never want to lose any of you." He smiled down at her and then smiled at Olivia. His arms slowly brought her up so he could place a kiss on her tiny forehead. "She's so little. I don't ever remember holding a baby this small in my entire life."

"Well I hope you get to hold more one day," Irunya said with a smile. "More of your own children, that is. I want to bear more children for you to hold just like this. That would mean the world to me, just to watch you hold them like you are with Olivia."

Matthew smiled at Irunya. "You really mean that? I know how hard it is on your body."

"Just watching you hold them makes it all worth it," Irunya said, raising herself to kiss his cheek. She smiled at him and snuggled into him again. "I love you, Matthew Williams, and I will bear as many children as I can for you. It's not because my mother told me it's my role in mind. It's because it's my desire to."

He smiled at her. "Even if we only had one more, I would be the happiest man in the world," he admitted to her. "I'd be so happy because I'd even just have you. You're the most wonderful thing to ever happen to me. I want nothing more than to be married to you and to live the rest of my life with you, even if we are to have no more children."

"You really mean that?" Irunya asked, smiling. "You really wouldn't mind if I couldn't bear anymore children?"

"Irunya, you have given me so much more than I could ever ask for," Matthew said, smiling. "Of course I wouldn't mind. We have the two most perfect children in the world, and I have the most amazing woman in the world to love. I think I'm pretty fortunate."

She smiled and put her hands on his face, directing it toward hers so she could kiss him. "You have no idea how in love with you I truly am," she softly said. "Matvey, there are no words in any language that can express it." Irunya kissed him again and again, trying to get her point across.

Matthew laughed softly. "Irunya, you have no idea how much you are arousing me," he admitted, blushing. "And I am holding a baby, in case you forgot."

"Then how about we go lay her down and fool around for a bit?" Irunya giggled.

"I cannot argue with that," Matthew said, smiling.

.

July, 1945, Des Moines, Iowa

Irunya stepped off of the bus that she had been sitting on for hours, though it had felt like days. She was carrying Olivia, who had fallen asleep an hour before after screaming until Matthew switched out with Vlad. Her eyes widened when she took in her surroundings. "Matvey, it's…" How could she describe this city?

"This is where I'm from," Matthew said, carrying Vlad behind her. He looked around and took a deep breath before smiling at his son. "This is where Papa is from," he told him. "Do you like your new town?"

Vlad inspected his surroundings. "I like!" he said, giving Matthew a thumbs-up. He clapped his hands gleefully.

"I'm glad," Matthew said. He walked up behind Irunya. "And what do you think, my love?"

"It's amazing!" she enthused. Her eyes took in all that was around her. "This is where you grew up, Matvey? I love it!" She looked over at Matthew as he grabbed their suitcase with one hand. "How far do we live from here?"

"Not far at all," Matthew said. He pointed down the street. "It's just this way."

He led his family down the street to a white house with dark blue shutters. It had a decently-sized yard that was closed in by a white picket fence. There was enough space for Irunya to have a garden if she wanted one. The house looked just perfect for all of them.

"Matvey," Irunya said, looking to him. "It's perfect."

"You should've seen if when I got it," Matthew laughed. "Luckily, my brother helped me fix it up in the week that he was here."

"Where is he now?" Irunya asked.

"He went to be with his family in England," Matthew said. "It seems he discovered his own family in the same way that I did." He smiled at Irunya. "Here's to the greatest happily ever after of them all."

"But Matvey," Irunya laughed, "this is only just the beginning."

.

The End


	16. Epilogue

July 1, 1955, Des Moines, Iowa

Matthew woke up when he felt movement on his bed, well more movement than his wife stirring or getting up. He reached over to the nightstand for his glasses and put them on, blinking his eyes open to find his wife and six children sitting all around him on the bed, smiling at him. A wide smile found its way to his face as he was greeted by a chorus of "Happy Birthday!" from all seven people.

"Thank you all," he said, bringing each of them in for a hug. He kissed each of their foreheads as he hugged them. "You are all the best!" His smiled widened as he reached his wife and kissed her softly. "You're brilliant, Irene!"

"Only the best for you, Matthew," she said with a smile, her silvery-blonde hair framing her face as her blue eyes sparkled with joy.

Irunya had changed her name to Irene when they had gotten married, wanting a more American name. Matthew had objected at first, but eventually gave in when he remembered how happy she was when she had suggested it in the first place. Although she had changed her name, she had insisted on leaving Vlad's name the same, insisting that it was important to who he was. Matthew couldn't argue with that.

Bailey, their third-born, smiled at Matthew. "How old are you now, Papa?" she asked him, crawling into his lap. She was only six and looked like the perfect mixture of Matthew and Irunya, having Matthew's hair and Irunya's eyes.

"Too old," Matthew answered, laughing. He kissed the top of her head and snuggled her. His gaze went to Vlad, who was now twelve, going on thirteen. It almost made him nervous how much they looked alike. Then again, all of his sons looked just like him, minus the glasses. "I'm way too old, Bailey."

Olivia giggled. "Papa, you say that every year!"

"I do, don't I?" Matthew laughed, smiling over at his ten-year-old daughter. She looked just like a young Irunya. That was enough to worry Matthew. She was already getting a lot of attention from the boys her age, and Matthew didn't like that at all.

"Silly Papa!" Matthew and Irene's fourth-born, Warren, giggled. "You're old!" He looked just like Vladyslav did when he was four. His giggling caused his father to smile. "Will I be big and strong like you when I get that old, Papa?"

"Of course you will, Warren," Matthew answered with a smile. He looked to Irene. "It's something that runs in the family. You'll be strong just like me and Uncle Alfred."

"But not a wimp like Uncle Arthur, right?" Warren giggled.

"Warren!" Irene gasped out, trying not to smile.

"Mama, you're the one who said he was a wimp," Warren defended. "I heard you say it to Papa one night. You said that Uncle Arthur was a wimp and needed someone like Uncle Alfred to keep him safe like how Papa kept you safe."

Irene blushed. "Warren, you need to stop listening to conversations that do not concern you," she scolded half-heartedly.

Warren bowed his head. "Yes, Mama."

Irene smiled and kissed her son's cheek before rescuing one of their two-year-old twins, Helen, from falling off the side of the bed. Helen and Emmett, the two youngest looked just like miniature Matthews, only Helen was a little girl. "Careful, Helen," she softly said. "That would hurt." She kissed her daughter's cheek and placed her back toward the middle of the bed near her twin. "Matvey, these kids have been crazy all morning."

"I can imagine," Matthew said. "Do you need any help now that I'm up?"

"Well, Papa, we've been working together to do something special for you," Olivia told him, grinning widely. She had her hands behind her back. "Mama went to a store awhile back and had it ordered specially from Quebec." Her hands came out from behind her back, and in it was a bottle of maple syrup. "We all got you this for your birthday."

Matthew, deeply touched, pulled them all in for a group hug. "You are the greatest family I could ever ask for!" he said, kissing each of them on the top of the head. "I haven't had the real stuff in so long that I forgot what it really tasted like!"

"It was Vlad's idea," Irene told him, smiling. "He heard that you were originally from Canada and that you haven't had real Canadian maple syrup since you were his age, so he wanted to do something special for you for your birthday. Then he told Livvy, Bailey, and Warren about it and they wanted to do it for you as well." She was beaming by the end. "By far, we have the sweetest kids in the entire world."

"We really do," Matthew agreed, grinning at her. He turned the bottle over in his hands. "What do you say I make some pancakes and we have some pancakes and syrup? I don't mind sharing the wealth since it was my amazing family who got it for me." His smile was almost too big to fit on his face. "You all most definitely need to try it anyway."

"Are you sure, Papa?" Bailey asked, looking at the mouth-watering syrup in her father's hands. "It's yours."

"Of course I'm sure," Matthew said, smiling. "It's mine to do what I'd like with, right? So why not share it with my family? That's what I'd like to do with it."

Irene smiled. "Do you see where you all got your kindness from?" she asked. "You all have wonderful, kind hearts like your father here." She turned her loving gaze to Matthew. She breathed a sigh of happiness, knowing that he was still that wonderful man that she had fallen in love with all those years before. That made her happier than anything in the world. Every time she realized that, she fell more and more in love with him than before. "Matvey, what do you say we go start on those pancakes?"

"Right," he said, smiling. "I just have to get this little Bailey off of my lap." He began to tickle the six-year-old, who began to squeal with giggles. "Whenever that will be."

Bailey crawled off of his lap, squealing, "Pancakes, Papa! Pancakes!"

"All right," he laughed. "I'll make them." He smiled and got out of bed. "But don't expect me to change from my pajamas. Pancakes are something that are to be eaten in pajamas, and pajamas alone. So, if any of you are not in pajamas, you had better go and change back into them."

His four oldest kids looked down at their clothes and quickly hurried from the room, taking the two-year-old twins with them so Irene could change back into her pajamas as well and have a moment alone with Matthew.

Irene walked over to Matthew and looped her arms around his shoulders. "Hello there, handsome," she said, smiling. "Happy Birthday. You're how old now? Twenty-five?"

"Wouldn't you just know?" Matthew said with a smirk. He kissed her lips softly as his hands rested firmly on her hips. "I'm actually thirty-three, if you must know," he told her, matter-of-factly. "But who's really counting?"

"Obviously, you are," Irene told him with a slight giggle. She smiled at him and kissed him again. "If you would have asked me, I tried to keep you younger than that."

Matthew smiled. "You're always trying to keep me young, Irene." His hands squeezed her hips as he kissed down her neck. "Now, get changed into your pajamas. It's pancake time, dear."

Irene smiled. "I remember the first time you ever made me pancakes. It was when we first moved here." She giggled. Her eyes seemed far away as her mind went back to a decade before when they had moved to America together. She suddenly kissed Matthew passionately. "Our life together is the best thing that has ever happened to me, the children, the nitpicky fights, the dancing, the love, all of it. I love you, Matthew Williams."

"Speaking of dancing," Matthew said. He walked over to the record player across the room from them and put on a record.

A familiar tune filled the room and instantly brought the two of them into a memory of a shy military captain and a young waitress in a Russian restaurant. Matthew remembered crossing the floor and asking her to dance. He remembered the joy in his heart when she had agreed to dance with him, starting their love story right then and there.

"May I have this dance?" Matthew asked her, walking over to her.

Irene's eyes sparkled with tears of joy as she remembered and took his hand. "Of course you may have this dance, and every dance after, my dear Matvey," she whispered to him. Her hand went to his shoulder as his hand went to her hip. She leaned her head on his other shoulder as they swayed back and forth to the music.

"Some folks can lose the blues in their hearts,

But when I think of you, another shower starts.

Into each life some rain must fall,

But too much is falling in mine."

"Remember the first time we danced to this together?" Matthew asked her softly. "I was only nineteen years old, but I was so unknowingly in love with you at the time." He smiled and kissed her temple. "You were, by far, the most beautiful girl I had ever seen, and that opinion still hasn't changed."

Irene smiled. "Back then, I was just simply Irunya Chernenko, some waitress at some restaurant in Russia. Now look at me. I'm Irene Williams, mother of six and wife to the most amazing man in the entire world." She laughed to herself. "I wouldn't change it for any amount of money anyone could ever offer me. I love my life the way it is."

"Into each life some rain must fall,

But too much, too much is falling in mine.

Into each heart some tears must fall,

But someday the sun will shine.

Some folks can lose the blues in their hearts,

But when I think of you another shower starts."

Matthew smiled at her. "When we're apart, you're all I ever think about. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I'm so glad that we're going to be growing old together. We'll be the happiest two there ever were."

"Isn't that Alfred and Arthur?" Irene teased, smiling up at Matthew as the song was beginning to reach its end.

"Then we'll be the happiest heterosexual couple there ever was," Matthew corrected, smiling back. He kissed her lips as the song ended. "Now get into you pajamas. We have pancakes to eat."

Irene smiled. "You're so demanding," she teased. "I like that." Her eyes danced and sparkled as she pulled away from him. "I'll change while you make the pancakes, okay?" She kissed his lips again and walked over to the dresser to pick out some pajamas. "I'm honestly quite excited for this."

"You should be," Matthew laughed. "It's not often when you get real Canadian maple syrup in Iowa." He smiled and looked down at the bottle in his hands. "We really do have the greatest family, don't we? Our kids are the best there ever were. They're thoughtful and would rather think of the ones they love before themselves."

Irene smiled at Matthew as she unzipped her dress in the back. "And I wonder where they got that from," she sarcastically said. "It couldn't have been from you, could it?"

"Or you?" Matthew asked, smiling. "You're a very kind woman. I'm sure they could've gotten it from their beautiful and caring mother as well."

"There's a reason why I call you 'God's Gift', Matthew," Irene said. "It's because I believe that you truly are God's gift to me." She smiled at him and blushed a little. "There is no better explanation than that. You have been nothing short of amazing since we've been together. I love you, and I always have. Ever since the day we met, you have held a special place in my heart." She let her dress fall to the floor and pulled her nightgown over her head. "That's why I hope that every day is as wonderful for you as it is for me." She walked over to him and grabbed his hand. "I know that there are times that we may argue and fight, but what couple seriously doesn't?"

Matthew smiled and grabbed her hand as they walked out of their room together. "That's true," he said. "That's very true." He squeezed her hand as they made their way to the kitchen together. "This is what I live for, my life with you and the kids. My family is what I live for. I love you all so much."

"We love you too, Matvey," Irene answered, smiling. "You are our everything. I hope you know that. The kids and I, we wouldn't even be able to function properly without you. You are our world."

"And you are all mine," Matthew told her, getting a bowl from the cupboard and wandering the kitchen, gathering ingredients for pancake batter. He smiled as he got it all and began to mix it. "I remember meeting Vlad for the first time. I didn't even know about him until he was a few months old, but do you remember how proud I was. And I was actually there to witness Olivia being born."

Irene nodded. "And then we moved here and you were there for the births of Bailey, Warren, Emmett, and Helen," she reminded. She sighed out happily as she sat at the table. "We have an amazing family, Matthew. And I think we're going to be the happiest couple in all of America. Notice I said that because your brother lives in England."

Matthew smiled. "We'll be the happiest married couple in the world," he stated. "There, now we beat him out for all of it since he can't get married."

"That's so mean," Irene laughed, but she still smiled either way. "I really do like them, though. Alfred is a very kind man, and his partner Arthur is wonderful. Arthur's son was always really good with Vlad. He's eighteen now, isn't he?"

"Nope," Matthew answered, smiling. "He turned nineteen today. We have the same birthday. I remember that much about that little boy."

"He's not a little boy anymore, is he?" Irene asked, giggling. "Leon is the same age you were when we met. Doesn't he have a partner as well?"

Matthew wracked his brain. "He does, but the man's name escapes me," he answered. "I always forget. All I know is that he's Scandinavian or something like that. Moved to London when he was really young. His older brother was friends with Alfred back during the war, if I remember correctly. Something about his brother dying but not really dying. I don't remember the whole story. I just remember that there was something that had to be kept a secret from anyone not involved."

Irene nodded, confused. "Right," she stated, lost. She shook her head. "Anyway, I hope they're all doing well. When was the last time you heard from Alfred and Arthur anyway?"

"A week or so ago I got a letter," Matthew answered. "They're doing well. My letter should be getting there in about a week or two. I wished Alfred a happy birthday in it."

"When is his again?" Irene asked. "I always forget, is it three days before or three days after yours?" She looked as if she were putting a lot of thought into it. "His is Independence Day, right? I think that's right."

"You're correct," Matthew said, smiling. "I'm three days older." He poured some of the batter into a skillet as the kids all began to filter into the kitchen. "There you all are," he greeted, smiling widely. "I was beginning to wonder where you all were. Get ready for pancakes. The first one is already being made."

Vlad smiled as he and Olivia helped the two youngest into their booster seats at the table. "Papa, you're so nice," he said, patting Emmett on the head. "I'm glad that I take after you."

Matthew nearly dropped the spatula upon hearing his son say that. "Why thank you, Vlad," he said, smiling. "It means a lot to hear you say that. But just remember that your mother is just s kind and caring as I am. I think that you're kind because of both of us."

Irene snorted, laughing. "Learn to take a compliment, Matthew," she said. "He was trying to compliment you on your birthday, but as always, you directed it at me." She shook her head in disbelief. "Unbelievable."

Matthew shrugged sheepishly. "I'm just giving credit where credit is due," he stated, smiling. "Is there something wrong with that?"

"Not at all," she stated. "Just learn to properly accept a compliment from you children when they give you one." She winked at him when he glanced over at her. "Otherwise, they'll never learn to accept one either."

Matthew blushed. "Right," he stated. "I'll have to remember that."

"Ten years, and you still have trouble even accepting them from me," she laughed. "You're unbelievable." She smiled. "But I guess that's something I love about you, my darling."

Matthew smiled at her as he flipped the pancake. "I'm sure there's more than just that to love about me." He winked at her, watching her turn a bright shade of red in the cheeks. "The first pancake will be done soon." His smile widened as he heard his kids cheer from the table. It was like music to his ears. He was certain that this kind of joy was what his father felt whenever he made pancakes for his family on Saturday mornings when Matthew was young. "I'll make them all quickly so we can all eat nice, warm pancakes together."

Matthew was true to his word and they were all soon sitting together at the table, maple syrup on their pancakes and taking their first bites. The children all had wide smiles on their faces, making noises of awe as their taste buds exploded in their mouths. Matthew specifically watched Irene's reaction, curious as to how she would react. He was not disappointed as he saw her blue eyes widen as she smiled at him.

"It's amazing," she softly told him, nodding as she smiled. "Thank you for sharing something so special and magical with us, Matvey."

"Thank you, Papa!" all six of the children chimed in.

And right then and there, Matthew felt like the luckiest man in the world.

.

The Actual End.


End file.
